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When do you think a brother and sister should stop sharing a room

(43 Posts)
Gingerninj Mon 19-Mar-18 21:50:02

DD2 (18 months) and DS (6 years old) have been sharing since she moved out of our room. Although right now they're still young and it doesn't really matter what gender they are or who they share with. I've been thinking about moving DD2 into DD1's (13 years old) room now rather than having to worry about it in the future. Not sure how DD1 would feel about this since she's never had to share her room before and probably won't get to have sleepovers as often. But it's going to have to happen eventually

LewisFan Mon 19-Mar-18 22:16:50

Housing departments say kids of different sex can share until 10yo, I think it is; same sex can share forever.

DearMrDilkington Mon 19-Mar-18 22:18:33

I think your 13yo needs the privacy a lot more than your 6yo.

OliviaBenson Mon 19-Mar-18 22:20:31

I think moving your 18mo in with a 13yo is a recipe for disaster.

It's too bigger age gap.

Passthecake30 Mon 19-Mar-18 22:20:38

I have a dd (8) and Ds about to turn 10. I recon 10 is correct.

PixieDust100 Mon 19-Mar-18 22:24:11

I wouldn’t put a 18m old with a 13 year old.
She needs more privacy then your 6 yr oldconfused

FlashTheSloth Mon 19-Mar-18 22:29:29

An age gap like that is partly what put us off having any more DC. It's not fair to expect a child of 13 to share with a toddler at all.

NualaCassia Mon 19-Mar-18 22:38:05

At some point in the near future, your ds is going to need privacy from his female siblings a lot more than your dd1 will need privacy from her sister.

If it has to happen at some point anyway, I would be moving dd2 into dd1’s room now. It’ll be much more of a disaster waiting until your ds is 10 and then trying to put your dd2 into a 17 year old’s room.

babydreamer1 Mon 19-Mar-18 23:02:29

I think it would be extremely unfair to ask your teenager to share with a baby! You'll completely take away her privacy given it won't just be her baby sister in her private space it will be you and your DH also. It sounds like a nightmare! Presumably the baby will go to bed a lot earlier than a teen? Never mind sleepovers, where will she go to relax, talk to friends, do her homework change her clothes? Will she just be expected to change in the bathroom and sneak in in the dark, no reading a book ect? Plus wake up when ever the baby does?! How would that work for exam time? I'd say you have no choice but to keep the baby in with the youngest until you can extend/find somewhere big enough to accommodate your family dynamic over the next 4 years.

Xmasbaby11 Mon 19-Mar-18 23:06:02

Anything to avoid putting toddler in with teenager. I'd have dd2 in with Ds and look for a solution in next 2 to 3 years. I actually think with those age gaps that sharing in any combination is very difficult.

SweetMoon Mon 19-Mar-18 23:08:12

About 10 or 11. I would leave 18 month old with the 6 year old.

6 year old will have a good few years before they are bothered about sharing. But a 13 year old, even if not bothered now will be bothered within a year I expect and need the privacy much more.

Littlelambpeep Mon 19-Mar-18 23:08:16

I think I would have the 18 month in with you quicker than your teen . ridiculously unfair

Notcontent Mon 19-Mar-18 23:55:27

Agree with everyone else - no way should you put a toddler in with a teenager.

dingdongdigeridoo Tue 20-Mar-18 00:00:53

Any way you can divide up one of the rooms instead? I would have hated sharing with a toddler at her age.

PussCatTheGoldfish Tue 20-Mar-18 07:17:53

Toddler can surely share with the 6 year old until he is 11?

So 5 years, by which time your 13 year old will be 18 and possibly at uni?

Grobagsforever Tue 20-Mar-18 07:24:51

Two little ones share til DS is ten or so and that gives you five or so years to save for a bigger home/extension/divide one of the rooms?

If your room is biggest you should divide that and you and DH squeeze a double into the next smallest room. You definitely can't make a teen share with a tot

FenellaMaxwellsPony Tue 20-Mar-18 07:25:00

I think you’d be better off putting the toddler back in with you than in with a 13 yo

ems137 Tue 20-Mar-18 07:44:31

I'd sooner have the toddler in with me than a teenager. What's she supposed to do on an evening? Go to bed at 7pm or sit downstairs with you all night every night?

I'd keep the youngest 2 together as long as possible and either expect the eldest to go to uni or look at having a loft conversion or changing a rooms purpose.

scrabbler3 Tue 20-Mar-18 08:43:01

Agree with the others. Keep the youngest two together for another few years and look into reconfiguration/moving somewhere bigger meanwhile, assuming finances allow.

juneau Tue 20-Mar-18 08:46:49

I agree - the teenager needs her space and privacy and should have her own room. It might be time to consider how you might create another bedroom - could you convert the loft? Divide a large room up? Convert a study or box room or something into a bedroom for your younger DD? I have a 10-year-old DS and he would hate sharing his room with a 5.5-year-old DSis - I think you need to sort this out by the time he's around 8-9 years old.

juneau Tue 20-Mar-18 08:48:14

Toddler can surely share with the 6 year old until he is 11?

Totally disagree with this^. Your DS will HATE sharing his room by that point.

Believeitornot Tue 20-Mar-18 08:50:45

A toddler with a teenager?!

My dcs were still waking early and at night when they were that age. I’d keep her in with you and seriously look at bedroom options.

Somerville Tue 20-Mar-18 08:57:25

You can't put a toddler in with a teenager about to start GCSE's. Your 13 year old will need to study in the evening, past the 18month olds bedtime. It makes no sense to have them together.
I'd be planning to keep the youngest two together (or fund an extra bedroom) until your oldest finishes school. At theat point DS will be 11 and needing his own space. Two primary kids sharing isn't as big a problem as teenager and pre-schooler.

Justanotherzombie Tue 20-Mar-18 08:58:50

Whenever either of them wants.

SuburbanRhonda Tue 20-Mar-18 09:00:32

No way would I put a toddler in with a 13-year-old.

What were your original plans for bedroom-sharing when you chose to have number 3?

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