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Private schools I know it's wrong to think this

(151 Posts)
mercurymaze Fri 23-Feb-18 20:18:27

But I can help feeling just a little disappointed when I read about an actress or someone going to a private school it just gives people such a great advantage in life and bugs me I know it's unreasonable

mercurymaze Fri 23-Feb-18 20:19:35

I guess in all creative industries it's who you know to get a break too

Dozer Fri 23-Feb-18 20:20:57

It’s not wrong to be concerned about inequality in many fields, creative industries being one.

mercurymaze Fri 23-Feb-18 20:42:48

It will never change

SuperBeagle Fri 23-Feb-18 20:50:09

Even if you remove private schools, particular people will still continue to be privileged. It won't automatically put everyone on even footing.

Lowdoorinthewal1 Fri 23-Feb-18 20:55:31

Is it not just a function of the fact that excelling in anything at a young age requires parental money?

There was a recent thread about winter sports along the same lines.

MyBrilliantDisguise Fri 23-Feb-18 20:56:42

The thing about private school is the confidence it gives you, I think, rather than anything else. When you think about it, if you're in a creative field (and don't have a famous parent) then you're judged on what you've actually done - that book, play, TV part, song, etc. Yes, there are dynasties like the Foxes where they seem to get work whether they deserve it or not, but generally speaking they're going to be judged on their performance/creation. If you're from a public/private school you generally feel you're capable of doing anything; if you're from a sink comp then sadly you often don't feel that.

user1497863568 Fri 23-Feb-18 20:58:32

They are already advantaged Mercury. It's not necessarily the case that going to a private school is going to make them more advantaged. It's a bit like university - some people used to look at it from the outside and say 'he's rich because he went to university' rather than 'he went to university because he's rich'. Then everyone goes to university and the bar just gets raised higher by the advantaged (or they don't have to compete at all).

Abra1de Fri 23-Feb-18 21:00:37

Are you as indignant about people buying houses in expensive areas so they can get their children into high-performing state schools?

And about state-school children having private tutors?

Yvest Fri 23-Feb-18 21:05:48

Confidence comes from within and from the family. My kids are confident in their abilities because we as parents tell them that the world is their oyster. They have the advantage of interested professional parents but they go to a (very good) comprehensive. DS is currently planning on studying economics, preferably at Bristol with a plan to go into the City and DD plans to go to Oxford because it will help her in her career. She’s 12 so said career is as yet undefined. They have absolute belief that nothing is beyond their reach and they’re correct.

Their biggest advantage is a) that we can afford to supplement and support their aspirations and b)the connections my husband and I, our friends and our family can introduce them to, not the fact they haven’t been to private school.

mercurymaze Fri 23-Feb-18 21:05:51

Well yes I do think it's utter madness

user1497863568 Fri 23-Feb-18 21:09:38

As for things never changing that's not true. There's actually a fair bit of panic in the monied classes about the demographic collapse of the classes of people they've often picked on and relied upon to fight their wars. Not enough to actually change that behaviour of course ..

RollTopBath Fri 23-Feb-18 22:04:46

Yvest is absolutely right. Our two who went all through in a comprehensive are as confident as those who went to a public school for several years. We too supplemented whatbthe school could offer. We too used (and continue to use) connections to confer advantage.
Independent schools do give huge advantages, not least an elite peer group. It is not insurmountable to achieve similarly from a state school.

In terms of performing arts, you have fabulous schools lie BOA but young people really need supportive parents to take them to auditions, to pay for their travel to performances, to subsidise their living costs etc. As well as years of coaching in acting/singing/dancing.

Ructation Fri 23-Feb-18 22:45:22

If it's any consolation DH went to a very expensive private school, and was a total failure as an actor.

user1497863568 Sat 24-Feb-18 05:54:08

Expensive private school types also have a very singular and nasty tendency to turn to fascism when their boundless confidence doesn't quite get them the results they expected... generally you don't find it as strong amongst those who have been exposed to a wider variety of people.

Abra1de Sat 24-Feb-18 06:02:44

Wrong extremism—it’s communism they for, like the Cambridge spies, user.

Justwanttosayplease Sat 24-Feb-18 06:21:57

I think many more brainy people who you see on telly and things went to public school than private school. Public schools anyone can go there, private you have to pay £8 for a card.

Abra1de Sat 24-Feb-18 06:29:54

Public schools are private schools.

Justwanttosayplease Sat 24-Feb-18 06:42:53

That doesn't make sense Abra1de. When I go down to the Coach and Horses - which incidentally says Public House above the door - you see all and sundry in there. And the Red Lion round the corner. But the Conservative Club is a private club and you have to pay an annual fee to get in for a gin, so I think it must be private schools that you pay for and public schools anyone can go.

Justwanttosayplease Sat 24-Feb-18 06:44:40

The Green Man on Wentworth Street also says Free House. But when I go in they always charge me for a drink! I think that is privatisation of our public houses via the back door. Just like schools.

ifyoulikepinacolada Sat 24-Feb-18 06:51:13

Public and private schools are definitely both fee paying - weird but true!

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sat 24-Feb-18 06:51:54

Private schools = public schools Justwant, they are the same thing.

BigGreenOlives Sat 24-Feb-18 06:53:33

I don’t think the confidence thing comes from going to a particular type of school, shy people tend not to go on stage. It’s more likely that if your parents can afford to send you to a fee-paying school they will be able to support you working in a low paid industry, even if it’s only because their friend who has a spare room you can live in while you are starting out as an actor and so you can afford to be in London and audition. That kind of privilege makes a huge difference.

Rumpledfaceskin Sat 24-Feb-18 06:59:02

Confidence maybe but I think it’s more that they are just in the right circles from day one. It’s basically people paying for their kids to network, normal people won’t do that for their careers until they’re adults because there’s not much opportunity. I agree that it’s incredibly sad that so much talent must be wasted, and it’s irritating that some pretty talentless people do manage to forge careers (I mean they’re prob not going to win an Oscar but still).Acting is notoriously hard to break into unless you move in certain circles.

Justwanttosayplease Sat 24-Feb-18 06:59:50

That's just weird ThroughThick even more confused now. If they are the same thing why do people bother paying for private school when they can just go to public school for free. David Cameron went to public school - so I'm not sure its good value - but at least then his parents did not have to pay for it. The best value must be public school for boarders because then the parents save money all round on kids food and laundry and stuff. When I have kids they are going to that kind of school. Makes much more sense economically.

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