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I'm unhappy

(9 Posts)
MashLover Fri 23-Feb-18 17:12:23

i feel like I'm having a mid life crisis. I'm not even 30!

I can't believe I'm admitting this but I honestly feel like I could just pack some things and leave DH and the kids.

I moved to the village DH is from and I hate it. We've been here years and I still hate it. I'm trying to organise moving away but there seem to be obstacles constantly. I tried learning to drive but had panic attacks so can't. There's nothing to do here and I'm stuck Day in day out. No proper public transport.

I have a few friends but none I'm really close to. I used to have loads in my hometown. I used to be so social. I have nothing to do anymore.

I just feel like nothing brings me joy apart from running but because of a reoccurring injury I can't do it much.

I work a few evenings a week and hate it. It's a minimum wage shitty job. I work with teenagers who are nice enough but I have nothing in common with. I've tried to get a different day time job but there's no childcare here and DH works 11/12 hours days not including traveling time so it's all down to me.

I hate myself for it but I can't wait to get the kids to school in the morning and then once they are home I just feel like I'm waiting To put them to bed.

The thought that this is my life for the next however many years is so depressing!

I'm not depressed. I had pnd with DC1 and this definitely isn't the same. I'm just really bored with my life and not sure what to do about it.

I feel sorry for my kids.

Chugalug Fri 23-Feb-18 17:15:16

Sounds like you need to move ...how did you end up there? Was it your choice?

snackarella Fri 23-Feb-18 17:16:17

Didn't want to read and run - I guess moving to somewhere things are more accessible would be a start.
I hate it when life gets like this, I've had periods of it and am not far off one now! Make whatever changes you can. The DC probs won't notice anything is up they're very resilient - but do what you can to improve things. Good luck xz

MashLover Fri 23-Feb-18 17:17:37

It was a choice but wasn't at the same time. I'm from a town near London and we are living up north. We couldn't afford to live down there. I know we still can't but I'd love to move to a town/city up here.

Chugalug Fri 23-Feb-18 17:20:14

That might be a good solution,to move somewhere more busy

Thetruthfairy Fri 23-Feb-18 17:22:02

Definitely try and speed up your move if you can. Have you thought about some thought of treatment to help your panic attacks? Hypnosis maybe? Learning to drive has been the best thing for me as I am the type of person who likes to do different things every day.

lolaflores Fri 23-Feb-18 17:25:51

if you nail down the driving, you will have choices. Perhaps find a different instructor, explain your nervousness, let them go at your pace and get lots of practise in between lessons. Just short journeys at first on quiet spots so no one is getting hot and bothered and making your panic.
Get the car. Get a different job. Get more control.

Scullerymaid Fri 23-Feb-18 17:27:05

Look in to getting an electric bicycle so you can get further afield, OP. Seriously they're life changing when it comes to getting about without a car.

fia101 Fri 23-Feb-18 17:41:22

I hear yah - I hate where I live too. I live where my husband is from and it reminds of that Morrissey song "everyday is like Sunday everyday is silent and gray". I work in the nearest city but it's a big commute. I'll sometimes get home at 9 simply to sleep and do the commute again in the morning. I think what a waste of life. Husband wouldn't move though.

If your husband would do it please. Life is too short to be miserable. There are too many amazing towns and cities to be stuck in shithole

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