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How would you feel about this journey?

(92 Posts)
wethairisbadforyou Wed 21-Feb-18 10:21:01

How would you have felt about a two hour journey of 100 miles on a train or bus, alone, at 18? It would be there and back again to visit a friend at university for the day. Or alternatively how would you feel about your son or daughter doing this journey now?

ChessieFL Wed 21-Feb-18 10:23:21

Fine. At 18 (possibly still 17) I travelled on my own by train from Somerset to York and back for uni open day! Two hours is nothing.

FenellaMaxwellsPony Wed 21-Feb-18 10:24:04

18? Are there additional needs at play here? If not, I wouldn’t think twice about it!

chipsandcurrysaucemonster Wed 21-Feb-18 10:24:25

Sounds fine - I was a little daydreamy at 18 so if involves multiple changes and rushing for platforms at different stations then I'd have been a little nervous. But at 18 I was off to uni alone and had to travel around a new city, food shops, laundrettes, local bus timetables. Get to the station nice and early and have a decent plan to meet friend at other side and I see no issues smile

TheMogget Wed 21-Feb-18 10:25:14

Agree, fine. At 18 it wouldn't be usual for someone to have a gap year and go travelling.

BigEthel Wed 21-Feb-18 10:25:26

I think I would never have been able to visit potential universities if I hadn't done it.

You're talking about someone 18, not 8.

brizzledrizzle Wed 21-Feb-18 10:25:51

It's a non-issue unless there are other factors like special needs.

Marcine Wed 21-Feb-18 10:25:56

Fine, did it lots. You get than 18 too.

Aprilshowerswontbelong Wed 21-Feb-18 10:26:12

I left home at 17.....

Velvetbee Wed 21-Feb-18 10:27:30

Fine. DD 18 has anxiety but we would talk through the journey.
In the past I’ve even printed off plans of stations available online so that she could feel confident about changing train.
She went from Winchester to Cardiff a couple of times when she was 16.

Efrig Wed 21-Feb-18 10:27:34

My ds1 did 120 miles on three different trains at age 14.

DancesWithOtters Wed 21-Feb-18 10:29:08

I used to do this every fortnight on the National Express at 18. I'd left home for uni and was living on the other side of the country. What's the problem?

MrsCaecilius Wed 21-Feb-18 10:29:08

Fine. I went inter railing at 17 and travelling back to the UK from Budapest solo including multiple train changes!

Unless there are special needs I can't see the issue.

BrazzleDazzleDay Wed 21-Feb-18 10:29:34

Total non-issue. I moved to a college a 3 1/2 hour bus journey away just shy of my 16th, had been doing that journey weekly for 9 months before to visit friends.

irregularegular Wed 21-Feb-18 10:30:42

Not an issue. My 14 yr old has done not much different. 1.5 hours and 2 changes including a station he had not been to before. We were in touch by phone and he was met at the other end by his Grandad.

I wouldn't feel in need of as much back-up for an 18 yr old, obviously.

Babdoc Wed 21-Feb-18 10:33:36

I think it depends v much on the level of maturity of the individual kid. Some are shy and nervous, lacking coping skills even at 18, while others are very confident much younger. My dd1 went off alone by train to camp at a Dungeons and Dragons festival event 300 miles away when she was 16. I was a bit anxious but she was fine - the old guys put her tent up for her and gave her a lift to the supermarket to get food supplies. ASDA was stunned to find a load of axe wielding Viking warriors, witches and goblins walking their aisles!
DD1 had a ball and came home v chuffed with herself. She has Asperger’s syndrome, so it was great social skills practice.
Only you know whether your own child is ready for the trip, but at 18 they’re officially adult and you can’t stop them.

Slanetylor Wed 21-Feb-18 10:34:47

I was in university at that age doing this journey every week.

Matilda1981 Wed 21-Feb-18 10:35:44

I went to Australia by myself when I was 18!! Hadn’t ever flown before, a bus journey would be a breeze!

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks Wed 21-Feb-18 10:36:53

Fine. They're 18.

PersonA Wed 21-Feb-18 10:38:05

Do they have additional needs?

AmysTiara Wed 21-Feb-18 10:39:05

It's fine.

FluffyWuffy100 Wed 21-Feb-18 10:40:00

Do they have sever additional needs????? Why are you asking?

wethairisbadforyou Wed 21-Feb-18 10:40:43

I don't have any additional needs, my mum is just not very keen for me to do it and I think I'm taking her feelings onboard. I'm feeling a bit anxious about it.

wethairisbadforyou Wed 21-Feb-18 10:42:39

And I'm feeling the pressure to not feel anxious, because I know that logically how all of you reacted is the right response.

notacooldad Wed 21-Feb-18 10:44:57

Is this a joke?
Assuming no additional needs what is the problem?
DS is now 21 but by the age of 18 ( and 3 months ) had done a 10 day trip to Poland, Prague, Berlin and somewhere else and had visited his aunty Melbourne by himself transferring at Adu Dabi by himself. Also at 18 driven himself from the North West to Heathrow airport on a contracting job.
DS2 is 18 and has travelled from Lancashire to Skye to meet up with us ( we started our holiday before him) it never occurred to me to be bothered by it or feel anything.
I'd left home at 18 and a half and moved to a a different county all by myself.

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