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Day 1 no dummy breaking my heart

(24 Posts)
whyIsARavenLikeAWritingDesk Mon 19-Feb-18 12:24:08

I posted last week about taking the dummy off my 14 month old DD and the time is here!!
I put her down for her nap at 1140 and she's obviously still not asleep, she was quiet for a while to start with and since then she's been crying so hard it's breaking my heart! I keep going in, calming her down but the second I put her back in her cot she's screaming again. How long would you persevere for? Until she eventually falls asleep? Or do I give her the dummy? I'd rather she didn't have it as she is on her 3rd ear infection of the year and I feel her dummy isn't helping!

HanaK88 Mon 19-Feb-18 12:25:10

Just keep it for bed, I can't see it doing any harm.

PEARSON93 Mon 19-Feb-18 12:26:25

Just chuck them away in the bin. That way you won't be tempted to give it back.

SleepingInNewYork Mon 19-Feb-18 12:27:15

I think you need to decide that you are taking it away or else you aren’t. I took DD1’s dummy away when she was almost two and after three nights (I cuddled her to sleep instead of leaving her to self settle as normal) she didn’t ask for or want it again.

Aprilshowerswontbelong Mon 19-Feb-18 12:28:07

Ear infections are the worst pain. If her dummy makes her feel better yabu to keep it off her. My ds has his for bedtime and the odd cheeky nap at 3.5 and his speech and teeth are amazing!! From a year old it was a no no during the day apart from naps. He was fine with this, easy distracted! Why make your life and hers harder right now?

sundayfeeling Mon 19-Feb-18 12:33:55

This is the trick we used and it worked perfectly.
I cut off the tip of the dummy, gave it to DD as normal. She put it in her mouth and then said 'it's yuk, bin' and she put it in the bin. That was the end of the dummy. She remembered it once or twice after and I said to her 'remember, it was yuk and you put it in the bin'. And she just carried on.
Because she made the decision to put it in the bin herself she was fine with not having it.

Blaablaablaa Mon 19-Feb-18 12:35:07

My 3 year old has only just got rid of his dummy. He never had it a nursery but was obsessed with it at home. Once he was old enough to understand we told him he could only have it at night/nap time ( suddenly bedtime was much easier!) then we started to talk about how he might want to send them to the dummy fairies in return for a present. Took a while but one day he woke up and told us he wanted to send them to the fairies in return for a toy car.....hes never asked for one since.
Maybe wait until she can understand why you're taking them away? We really played on the 'dummies are for babies and you're a big boy now' angle which seemed to appeal.

Soubriquet Mon 19-Feb-18 12:42:53

Oh give her dummy. No one talks about taking away that special toy.

My dd had her dummy until she was 3.

If it bothers you, let her have it for bed and naps. She will give it up in her own time. It's just a dummy not crack cocaine

DressAndGo Mon 19-Feb-18 12:43:51

Give it back, then.

Isadora2007 Mon 19-Feb-18 12:45:08

For just sleeping time surely a dummy isn’t that bad?

NotUmbongoUnchained Mon 19-Feb-18 12:45:27

My daughter “donated” hers to the babies that live in the nursery. It worked straight away which was amazing because she loved her dummy.

TheArtOfNoise Mon 19-Feb-18 12:45:45

Give it back, poor thing.

Nyancat Mon 19-Feb-18 12:48:53

Another who waited til nearly 3 here and speech and teeth are great. We dropped it to just naps and bedtime, then when he stopped napping they had to stay in his bed. We gave them to the fairies or santa in exchange for a toy. First night was awful, he was like an addict looking for one final hit but after that no problems at all.

WanderlustHenpeck Mon 19-Feb-18 12:49:38

I would give it back too, 14 months is young to be giving it up. I personally think it's easier to give them up when they are a bit older and have a better understanding of what's going on. My son had his till just after he turned two.

I wouldn't have thought a dummy caused ear infections either, but it will help comfort her when she is unwell.

Troels Mon 19-Feb-18 12:56:52

We did it for bedtime only then Ds gave it up on his own at 3. He kept the dummy under his pillow. If he ever got upset or hurt, he would sit on his bed and suck his dummy for a few minutes, then put it back and go off to play.
Give it back, let her have some comfort she's a little baby. They grow so fast she'll be giving it up on her own in no time.

Awwlookatmybabyspider Mon 19-Feb-18 12:58:01

. Give it back to her. She clearly isn't ready to give it up. She's only a little baby. I've never saw the point in taking a child's comforter away before theyre ready.Theyre getting strssed you're getting stressed. Whos winning.
I've no shame in admitting. My dd had her bottle for bed until she was almost 8. She was happy so I was happy. I knew she wasn't going to walk down the aisle with it.

Meandmy4 Mon 19-Feb-18 13:00:36

Arrrr feel your pain but if there really isnt any medical issue (protruding teeth ect) give it back !!! wink
Its a comfort, keep it just for bed ? Give it back x

Pinkponiesrock Mon 19-Feb-18 13:04:30

My middle DS was the only one of my 3 who would take a dummy and HE LOVED IT grin

His sister was born just after he turned 2 so he definitely still had one then. We had a rule that once he was walking etc that dummys were only for the house then later on only for bed time so they stayed in his cot.

He did occasionally find a stray dummy in the house and would climb inside a kitchen cupboard with it and shut the door for a ‘dummy fix’ grin We called it ‘contraband doddie’!

HereWeGoAgain456 Mon 19-Feb-18 13:09:23

We took DS dummy off him just after Christmas when he was 9 months. We did as SleepingInNewYork said and cuddled him to sleep for naps and bedtimes for a few nights until he had forgotten about it. However if you're unsure maybe give it back. If it makes any difference I regret taking it away now - we always said we would before he turned 1 but in the last few weeks he's cut his molars and had 2 ear infections... my God do I wish he still had a dummy!!!!

SleepingStandingUp Mon 19-Feb-18 13:12:11

I'd wait til she's older and can understand. Just keep them out the way on the day. The dummy isn't causing the ear infection but I bet it's helping with the discomfort

QuestionableMouse Mon 19-Feb-18 13:14:54

If she's not well, now is probably not the best time to take away something she gets comfort from. 14 months is still very little.

mommathatwearspink Mon 19-Feb-18 13:15:49

We took DD's dummy away a couple of weeks before her third birthday. I threw them in the bin so we weren't tempted to give in. She cried for nearly two hours but then fell asleep... the next day she asked for it once and then that was it.

Soubriquet Mon 19-Feb-18 13:16:09

My Ds never took a dummy. I wish he did. Instead he sucks his blankets to sleep. I have to continually wash them as they end up stinking very quickly

Odiepants Mon 19-Feb-18 13:17:33

My DS loved his dummy. At 3 it was limited to bedtime only and he finally stopped sleeping with it at 4.5 - before that we tried a couple of times to give it up for present and each time he gave the present back and wanted his dummy again. It had no impact at all on his speech or teeth (8 now).

At 14 months I'd give it back -she doesn't understand why its gone and if its just for sleeping, I don't see the problem.

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