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Disappointed in best friend.

(94 Posts)
GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Mon 12-Feb-18 21:55:18

We had quite a traumatic weekend with one of our children. When it was all over, I put a reassuring message on Facebook as I couldn’t cope with replying to all the individual message I was receiving.

My best friend was away with work and sent a message asking if all was ok. I replied with details and said how I was feeling (scared, shaken, restless etc). I got a very generic message back and that was that. Oh well I thought, she is working and I’ll see her Monday (work).

I saw her today and she said nothing at all regarding the situation. At one point she even asked if I’d done something (work related) over the weekend and I said no due to ‘stressful weekend with X’. It didn’t even jog her memory or encourage her to ask how we were, just moved on to something about her own child.

That’s pretty shit isn’t it? Or am I making a mountain out of a molehill?

Anymajordude Mon 12-Feb-18 21:56:29

Nope, that's shit.

threeelephants Mon 12-Feb-18 21:56:42

Hard to say without knowing what the traumatic event was.

Anymajordude Mon 12-Feb-18 21:57:19

I hope your child is ok. flowers

Bobbiepin Mon 12-Feb-18 21:57:46

Pretty shit. Maybe she didn't know what to say?

MadMags Mon 12-Feb-18 22:00:59

I do think it depends. Are you prone to dramatic fb posts? And it depends on what happened too, I think.

Smidge001 Mon 12-Feb-18 22:01:33

Hmm. Well, I think maybe that because whatever the traumatic event was has all been sorted, there's not much more for her to say I guess. You already put a reassuring message on Facebook when it was all over....
If she'd heard about the issue during the traumatic part, I would expect her to ask more/be more interested etc. But once you've already effectively said it's done and dusted and now all's ok, there's not much more for her to do really.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Mon 12-Feb-18 22:12:30

My child had to have an emergency hospital admission and surgery. Though it’s over, they are still recuperating.

MaggieFS Mon 12-Feb-18 22:15:08

It is shit, but we're all only human and sometimes a bit crap and sometimes forget things. Rather than play games and try and jog her memory, why not just tell her more outright?

Nottheduchessofcambridge Mon 12-Feb-18 22:16:42

Ok are we talking tonsils out? Broken bone? or something life threatening?
Though I probably would have given a bit more sympathy than your friend did, it does also depend on the severity.

AnimalBrain Mon 12-Feb-18 22:16:42

A lot of people make such a big

AnimalBrain Mon 12-Feb-18 22:17:34

Posted too soon!
A lot of people make such a big thing out of these things but I think it’s very weird she didn’t ask after your DC!

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Mon 12-Feb-18 22:19:49

Not life threatening no. I don’t see how that matters, I would still ask after someone’s poorly child. Or asked if they needed anything.

Witchend Mon 12-Feb-18 22:21:13

It does depend.
I know someone who has frequently got things along the lines of "so traumatic. Up at hospital again with Twinkie-poo. All okay now, but couldn't stop crying earlier"
If you ask them how they are they will give you a full 30 minute episode of how they went to hospital and every doctor was amazed at the resilience of their child during the horrific operation of... removing a splinter that from the photo they show (always lots of photos) I wouldn't have needed anything except a quick flick of the finger to remove.
So I tend to try and steer them off the subject because firstly it's quite boring because it's always happening and secondly because at some point I'm going to say something that isn't totally complimentary. grin

For other people I would respond to similar messages with personal offers of help because I know if they're posting that there is something badly wrong.

Hissy Mon 12-Feb-18 22:21:19

You poor Thing! Hope everyone is ok now! What a shock.

Your friend isn’t a good friend

When my ds has his accident, my friends were unbelievably kind! My family were pretty shit tho.

Lucymek Mon 12-Feb-18 22:22:06

You told her it's fine now though why would she ask again?

Unless it was a tragic accident life of death I don't see the need to discuss it.

MadMags Mon 12-Feb-18 22:22:54

Without knowing the ins and outs, it sounds like it wasn't too serious, and thankfully you posted when your child was OK.

She texted to ask when she first saw the post...

She might think you were being a little bit attention seeking by posting about it? Have you done that type of thing before?

I would have asked, but in don't think its a heinous crime either.

Lucymek Mon 12-Feb-18 22:23:21

Did your child swallow something. Was it money ?

Chattette1 Mon 12-Feb-18 22:24:33

Strange behaviour from a very close friend. Why do you think she's behaving like this?

FluffyWuffy100 Mon 12-Feb-18 22:25:23

So child is fine and recovering?

Obviously it was a shit time over the weekend but the situation is dealt with and all is cool. No need for dramatics.

gamerchick Mon 12-Feb-18 22:28:18

Quite honestly it’s impossible to comment on this. There could be too many factors. From drama lama quite regular or she’s pre occupied with some shit in her own life and anything in between.

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe Mon 12-Feb-18 22:29:55

Just because there may be even worse things dc could have been hospitalised for doesn't mean what actually happened was irrelevant, it was still shocking and worrying for you. It's really odd for a friend not to ask after him confused. Is she usually a bit uncaring?

ButteredScone Mon 12-Feb-18 22:30:57

Sorry but you sound like one of those Facebook posters.

gamerchick Mon 12-Feb-18 22:31:37

You didn’t check in at hospital and then not answer any of the ‘are you alright hun’ posts did you? I tend to ignore those posts personally.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Mon 12-Feb-18 22:34:13

I did not ‘check in’ at hospital.

I have never ‘checked in’ at hospital. I’ve never needed to.

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