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Mil and photos

(22 Posts)
Lou573 Mon 18-Dec-17 15:01:59

I'll try and keep you brief: my mil constantly has a camera in my 2 year old' face, with accompanying commentary of 'sit here, smile, look at granny, put the cup down.' No idea what she does with all these photos.

It drives me bonkers, but should just bite my tongue and let her snap away? Ask my husband to say something? Just wondering if anyone has dealt with a snap happy relative already before I have a whole day of it over Christmas?

CuriousaboutSamphire Mon 18-Dec-17 15:05:39

"MIL! DC doesn't want to sit still and smile s/he wants a hug from / to play with / to talk to granny"

Blackteadrinker77 Mon 18-Dec-17 15:06:59

Following with interest as I am terrible for this.

Think my DD would tell me sod off though if it bothered her.

Scrowy Mon 18-Dec-17 15:10:12

My mum did this. She even went as far as re-dressing DD in something else once.

I took the piss out of her and she stopped doing it as much, but I appreciate that’s a bit more difficult with a MIL.

Is DD bothered? If it’s an actual camera rather than a camera phone can it be ‘lost’ for the duration of the visit after a few obligatory photos? It would be a bit bah humbug to stop MIL taking any Christmas photos fgrin

My MIL is more of a stealth snapper. I suspect she has hundreds of photos of DD I’m unaware of.

user1493413286 Mon 18-Dec-17 15:10:57

I’d let her take a few then say what the first person to reply said. Say it lightly and repeat as needed.

MrsDilber Mon 18-Dec-17 15:12:20

I will be this MIL one day.

I think, unless it's harming your child, you should bite your tongue. I'm sure mil can read if it's putting DD off.

Tinselistacky Mon 18-Dec-17 15:13:52

Get dd a toy camera off Santa and get her to click away in mil face! Prime dd before you see her though. Every time.

CuriousaboutSamphire Mon 18-Dec-17 15:15:41

Crikey MrsD! Can't you even begin to understand OPs issue with this?

Lou573 Mon 18-Dec-17 15:16:22

Love the idea of loosing the camera. Suspect I can enlist bil or husband to hide it when she's out the room!

The worst part is a single photo takes forever - the flash is on or she's looking the wrong way, or not doing something right! I did say to her last time that she'd be better off taking action shots, but mil didn't seem to take the hint.

MrsDilber Mon 18-Dec-17 15:43:37

curious she doesn't once say it upsets her DD. She's says she doesn't like her taking lots of photos. My dad was like this with my LO's, he adored them.** He didn't do it with bad intention, to be annoying, he just loved them to bit's.

CuriousaboutSamphire Mon 18-Dec-17 15:46:34

?? But it does annoy OP! She is allowed to be annoyed / bemused by it!

It doesn't really matter what we, or our family members, think or did. Op thinks it is odd and it makes her feel uncomfortable.

Lou573 Mon 18-Dec-17 16:03:10

To clarify - it does indeed annoy me - it drives me potty, but I just wanted some perspective on how to handle it, as I thought maybe I was being petty.

Aridane Mon 18-Dec-17 16:06:31

Maybe bombard MIL with photos of DC so she doesn't feel the need to take her own??

AdaColeman Mon 18-Dec-17 16:20:55

I'd be happy to let MIL take one or two photos, but then I'd get DD up and busy doing something else, preferably something involving Granny.
Can you help her with this jigsaw/doll/game please MIL?

I agree about making sure you send MIL lots of photos too.

Lou573 Mon 18-Dec-17 16:35:07

Mil constantly interrupts for photos regardless of what dd is up to - that's what I find so irritating. It's tough - if it was my own mum I'd just say 'mum, get your camera out of her face please!'

AdaColeman Mon 18-Dec-17 16:51:31

Well then, that's what you should say to MIL.

NewSense Mon 18-Dec-17 17:03:12

My MIL is exactly the same. And all my in-laws, in fact. It's so frustrating! It's what I hate most about "this day and age" ;) and I'm not even old! I hate that everything is viewed through a lens, and for them it seems to be that everything is an opportunity to get likes/comments. Mostly about what a wonderful granny etc... I'm always tempted to write "yeah, well she would be a wonderful granny if she actually played with the damn kid rather than just photographing it!"

Not worked out what to say yet though.

Oh, and after taking for thousand pictures of child eating lunch, the next half hour is spent showing the child all the photos they took... hmm confused It's very bizarre.

MrsBonato Mon 18-Dec-17 17:09:05

My mil is the same, sees her GC roughly every 3 months, spends the time trying to get a photo of her boys with their kids or with her or together. Never happens as she wants and she seems annoyed. If she spent more time playing with them they'd be more willing for a photo. Also it's not even like she isn't inundated with ones I send, nursery has tapestry so we also get a lot from there and pass on to her. My ds is now 4 and tells her he doesn't want his photo taken and asks her to play games instead.

Beyond annoying and upsetting that she just ignores him and insists on it.

Lou573 Mon 18-Dec-17 17:34:02

AdaColeman - I can just imagine the collective gasp if I said that to my mil. She's a little bit more delicate about such things than my own mother so I think it requires a bit more tact.

AdaColeman Mon 18-Dec-17 17:40:48

fsmile Perhaps you need to be a bit PA? Keep calling MIL Patrick Lichfield maybe?

Thirtyrock39 Mon 18-Dec-17 17:44:04

I remember this well my imlaws were like the paparazzi with dd1.it does ease off though as they get older - not helpful now but I don't think it's an easy issue to tackle so might be easier to grin and bear it till the phase wears off

GummyGoddess Mon 18-Dec-17 17:51:38

My dm used to do it until I asked her to stop. It's like watching people constantly taking photos on their phones at weddings, they aren't "in the moment" with everyone else, they might as well not be there if that's all they're going to do.

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