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Please help me think of a suitable penance

(7 Posts)
boughtpastry Sat 16-Dec-17 05:52:10

It's been DH's works Xmas Party. He has form for his work parties in that he usually gets stupidly drunk and is found on the sofa with a half eaten kebab fast asleep.

I have a stinking cold and asked him not to go too crazy so he's functioning to help with the DCs tomorrow (now today).

2am I wake up hearing a loud gurgling sound coming from down stairs. We've recently had the nightmare of a burst pipe and I thought it was that again so I rush downstairs to find DH in the downstairs bathroom, trousers round his ankles, penis out, fast asleep snoring like I've never heard. His snoring is so loud it was rattling through the house and I've not been able to sleep since. Three times I've gone downstairs and he hasn't budged.

Finally I was just dropping off when he wakes up starts stamping around downstairs, (clearly he was able to get his penis out but too drunk to take his shoes off) comes upstairs turns the bathroom light so my eyes promptly ping open and now he's collapsed in the spare bedroom snoring louder than before!

It's almost 6am and little point in even trying to sleep as the DCs will be up soon.

How can I get my vengeance?!

rizlett Sat 16-Dec-17 06:00:43

Shave off his eyebrows?? wink

boughtpastry Sat 16-Dec-17 06:04:12

Ha ha I like it! However he does have some important client meetings next week and it may not go down too well with work!

PastaOfMuppets Sat 16-Dec-17 06:06:37

All the cooking, cleaning and child duties for every day until Christmas

WonkyDonk87 Sat 16-Dec-17 06:06:51

Shame you didn't take a quick pic of him asleep downstairs, wang out.... would have made a lovely Christmas card wink

LolitaLempicka Sat 16-Dec-17 06:08:37

I think that getting up with the kids will be punishment enough. Enjoy your lie-in, and then you could go out with your friends this afternoon?

boughtpastry Sat 16-Dec-17 06:15:56

I was very tempted to take a picture! Actually Christmas dinner duties is not a bad plan! I've done pretty much all the ordering already - he can cook whilst I waltz around topping up everyone's glasses! Although his parents are coming and no doubt his mum will think I'm terribly mean and tell me that an adult man is totally incapable of cooking a roast!

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