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Friend thinks this is too much

(30 Posts)
HotHandle Tue 12-Dec-17 23:23:46

My life in a nut shell - PT job (though currently on maternity), PT business owner, 4 year old, 8 month old, no family support, FT working DH with 1hr commute, 11 year old stepson. In the new year I want to fit in exercise 2-3 times per week (evenings) and I return to work in early Feb when baby will be 10 months. Childcare is local nursery. I do all pick-ups/drop-offs.

My friend thinks that’s not realistic and that something will need to give. I’m a bit hmm and feel it should all be do-able and now feel I need to prove a point!

Bobbiepin Tue 12-Dec-17 23:30:54

If you can fit it in between work and pick up then do it. I'd expect to be quite tired though.

debbs77 Tue 12-Dec-17 23:52:48

Even half an hour at the gym is better than nothing! Do it!

HotHandle Wed 13-Dec-17 06:13:10

Exercise would probably be after work (so 7-9pm clashing with kids bedtimes) and for an hour long class. So I’d be out for more like 1.5-2hrs by the time I’d got there and back.

Baby is currently

HuskyMcClusky Wed 13-Dec-17 06:15:30

I think it totally depends on how supportive your husband is.

PomBearWithAnOFRS Wed 13-Dec-17 06:17:09

What the actual fuck has it got to do with your friend?
Do what you want, and just get on with it.
You will either fit it all in and carry on or find you don't have time and decide to stop doing it. Either way it's totally not anyone else's business.

HotHandle Wed 13-Dec-17 06:18:44

Oops pressed post too soon!

Baby is currently a bad sleeper day and night (and this is getting to me), but I have put on weight (which is also getting to me).

My friend thinks that “something will have to give” if I plan to do all I intend to. Is it really that difficult to juggle things? Next year I’d have school pick-ups to factor-in too so my non-job days would incorporate school and nursery runs, the gym plus running my business! I’m now wondering whether being on maternity with no nursery or school runs is giving me a false sense of free time!

HotHandle Wed 13-Dec-17 06:21:14

No I know it’s no one else’s business. But we were chatting yesterday and my friend knows I have form for taking on too much then crashing. This all feels doable but I was talking to her about whether the reality would be different.

Cupoteap Wed 13-Dec-17 06:24:21

I think she's coming from a good place - all you can do is try. I had a bad sleeper and could not have managed it with work and my other dc cause I was fucked doesn't mean you won't.

MaverickSnoopy Wed 13-Dec-17 06:33:58

I wouldn't be able to do it but that might be because I spend a lot of time managing household finances in great detail (as well as other computer based things which makes our lives better), as well as trying to fit in housework when DH isn't here so that when he is we get family time without chores (rare).

Fwiw I work PT (20hrs) and am trying to set up a PT business. I have a 6yr old and a 1yo and do school run and nursery run (the collections for the latter are done by DH). So similar circumstances but I feel you have more to do. However each day I have a list of approximately 10 - 15 things to do (on top of housework and work) to keep everything running. DH does his fare share too but nonetheless I don't have the capacity for more.

That being said we're all different and perhaps you could do it. Definitely try and see how you get on, but maybe try not to feel like you need to prove a point as you don't want to burn yourself out.

LiveLifeWithPassion Wed 13-Dec-17 06:38:35

If you’re an organised person and can get enough sleep to function well, then why not?

RosaDeZoett Wed 13-Dec-17 06:43:39

I had 2 terrible sleepers in a row, plus a not hugely supportive husband and a ft job. Exercising actually saved my sanity. Even though I was wrecked, when I exercised it was often the best I would feel all day.

I'm no expert, but tbh brisk walking or jogging may be better mentally, physically, and easier to fit in? You're not tied to class times, you can walk out the door as soon as Oh walks in, and the fresh air is like magic. (I was going to suggest getting a dog, then you'll be forced to walk/run at least once a day.... But that would depend on your circumstances)

Shadow666 Wed 13-Dec-17 06:44:22

I’ve started brisk walking during my lunch hour. It’s great exercise and not too difficult to fit into a busy family life. I try to do 40 minutes every day.

Shadow666 Wed 13-Dec-17 06:45:18

Crossed posts with Rosa there 😝

SnowGlitter Wed 13-Dec-17 07:01:54

Well there's nothing to stop you trying, is there?

Mummyoflittledragon Wed 13-Dec-17 07:14:58

It depends what time you pick up. Doesn’t sound like very much time to do anything much including things with the kids eg feeding, homework, baths and fun etc.

Appuskidu Wed 13-Dec-17 07:19:07

my friend knows I have form for taking on too much then crashing.

Do you agree?

I wouldn’t do it because I hate the gym-if rather eat less and lose weight that way, but if you are commuted and enjoy it, I don’t see why not. Who will look after the children whilst you’re at the gym and are they ok with that regular commitment? If it’s your DH-will he get regular down time, too?

zeebeedee Wed 13-Dec-17 07:30:08

The only thing I would suggest is that you join a pay as you go type gym, instead of starting a contract, so that if you can't make the time, you're not beating yourself up about the money spent!
I would agree with others though, that walking/running is free and more flexible, and you start as soon as you step out of the door rather than adding travelling time on top of gym time.

Imbroglio Wed 13-Dec-17 07:33:10

Does any local gym have a creche?

InvisibleKittenAttack Wed 13-Dec-17 07:34:00

Can you look for a buggy fitness class on your non-work day? Usually run in parks. If you could get into a routine of that being the thing you do on that non-work day it might help.

If your DH will be back in time for you to go to the gym and will do the bedtime routines alone 3 nights aweek, then it might be perfect for you.

Only you and your DH know if this will be possible for you.

OllyBJolly Wed 13-Dec-17 07:34:14

I find exercise gives me more energy - I am far more productive when I'm active than when I get lazy. Great destressor as well.

Is there a gym with a creche?

Ragwort Wed 13-Dec-17 07:36:47

I think if you are motivated to do it then you can do it; I have a friend who fits so much into her life that it amazes me, but she enjoys being super busy all the time and her idea of hell would be an evening on the sofa reading a book with a glass or two of wine which is what I do most evenings grin. She is super organised - does her housework and 'life admin' between 5am-6am every morning, commutes over an hour and a half each way to work (f/t very senior role), looks after elderly parents, has an amazing social life, exercises every single day, organises 4-5 short breaks abroad every year, brings up 4 children etc etc etc.

We are all different - try it (as someone else says, don't fork out for an expensive contract at the gym though).

user1493413286 Wed 13-Dec-17 07:41:34

I think it depends whether you’re the kind of person who needs time to relax in the evening, how supportive your husband is, whether any cleaning or shopping needs to be done in the week and what time you go to bed.
It sounds like a lot to me but I know I need time to chill out in the evenings and I go to bed early. Rather than launch into it why don’t you start with one class per week then built up; also if you haven’t exercised since before your baby was born that’ll be too much to launch into all at once

zzzzz Wed 13-Dec-17 07:43:44

I think you can do it but I would worry about missing three bedtimes a week, especially when getting your eldest settled into school. I think those bedtimes will be very precious to you both.

As far as work load goes, it sounds fine to me, but I enjoy busy.

RosaDeZoett Wed 13-Dec-17 09:48:58

It sounds counterintuitive, but I used to get up at 5.30 to walk/jog. (even with a constantly waking baby) Then it's done, and you're not infringing on anyone else's time. If I left it later then I just didn't get out. I'd be in bed by 9 most nights mind you smile

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