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If you’ve both FF and BF - which did you prefer?

(71 Posts)
CestLaVie93 Thu 23-Nov-17 20:51:22

I don’t want any bun fights about what’s best for baby etc etc. This is purely a question about personal preference as I’m thinking about maybe having #3 one day & don’t know what I’d do.

DC1 Formula fed - dropped night feeds pretty early & was in a feeding routine quite quickly. Did some controlled crying at 10 months & has slept fine in a cot, then bed ever since.

DC2 breastfed - still has night feeds at 5 months & not expecting them to drop anytime soon. Cosleeping & can’t bare the thought of sleep training but equally can’t bare the thought of distrusted sleep for any longer. Won’t take a bottle.

I genuinely preferred formula feeding but I don’t know if it’s becauee it’s still ‘early’?? I’m so tired, I’ve not had a long block of sleep for so long now. I can’t share the care, it’s all down to me. I feel like I can’t give my other child what they need either, I’m a sleep deprived elastic band that’s at breaking point & I hate cosleeping but I don’t know how to stop without getting even less sleep! I don’t want to stop bf as I feel I’ve come this far after so many issues (& so much money spent 😂) so I appreciate I’m wallowing in a situation I’m allowing!

Now my issue is, I’ve always planned to have 3-4 children so I definitely want another but I don’t know if I want to bf or ff the next child. Just interested to hear if anyone else has been in a similar situation & what you think?? Does it get easier at 6+ mark or maybe I should consider combi-feeding next time round (but keep reading how it’s sooo bad for breastfeeding!)

Please no breastfeeding debates it’s been done to death & just ends in tears wine

TheWiseOldElf Thu 23-Nov-17 20:56:26

I have 3 DC and all we’re mixed fed to a greater or lesser degree. I hated BF for the first few days when painful but loved it for the few months after that when it helps to calm them and it’s easier to have milk on tap etc. After about 6 months I found BF more difficult again because it’s very tying as you say and difficult to establish a routine. Have you considered switching to FF now?

MissOrganisedMe Thu 23-Nov-17 20:56:27

I'll start this by saying I've only got my DD. I've BF from birth and she's 9 months now. Can count on one hand the amount of times she's slept through.

You're asking the question that I'm asking myself, if I go on to have another. If I'm honest, I don't know if I would exclusively BF again.

Tinselistacky Thu 23-Nov-17 21:01:05

Ebf many dc.
Range from sleeping though at 2 weeks old to still bf to sleep at 12 months, and all sorts in between.
Mixed fed last ds who slept through at 9 months when I stopped bf.
No pattern in my case at all.
Tbh I bloody hated washing and making bottles so would def ebf again. Sadly baby days are over. sad

Passthecake30 Thu 23-Nov-17 21:01:10

I mixed fed dc1 and then moved onto formula only at 3 months

I exclusively bf dc2, one drivers was that it was so much easier than sterilising and making bottles etc.

Both slept badly.

TheWorldIsMyCakePop Thu 23-Nov-17 21:01:25

I hand on heart preferred BF but the FF one slept/sleeps better.

EssentialHummus Thu 23-Nov-17 21:03:00

I’m only 11 weeks in with DC1 but a big fan of mixed feeding, even if it’s just chucking an occasional bottle in so DH can feed. We tend to formula feed in the evening as I feel she settles much better with it.

Theresnonamesleft Thu 23-Nov-17 21:09:10

I really hated bf. I tried with all 4. The youngest was the worst beicase there was so much pressure. All I kept getting told was it would get better. All he wanted to do was feed. It was exhausting.
I had 3 months of hell before I decided to give up. It wasn’t getting better. Everyone was suffering.

Schmoochypoos Thu 23-Nov-17 21:11:08

I mix fed DS1 and switched completely onto formula when he was 7months. He was sleeping through at around 10months.

I EBF DS2 until he was 15months. He was waking 1/2 times a night until then. Once I stopped BF he slept through almost immediately, he was obviously just waking for comfort.

However even with the night waking I preferred EBF. It was more convenient, my hands were ruined the first time round washing up bottles all the time. It was an amazing way to comfort DS2 and it was free!

I’d EBF again if I had another. (Assuming I could)

Whizziwig Thu 23-Nov-17 21:11:47

DC1 - BF at first. Awful reflux and fed little and very often. I was not very well informed about BF and made lots of mistakes so I didn't build up a good supply and was advised to top up so ended up mixed feeding. I couldn't cope with no sleep and was too scared to co-sleep so decided to start bottle feeding at night from early on. I kept up mixed feeding for 3 months then went to just FF. I remember feeling relieved at no longer breastfeeding, but bottle feeding was no walk in the park either. Reflux meant she still fed little and often which was a PITA as I had to split each feed and she eventually ended up on Neocate which smelled and tasted like sweaty feet.

DC2 I wanted to breastfeed. Felt like I had learned from my early mistakes and fed her literally every time she opened her mouth. Also had reflux, but not as badly and we didn't get off to the best start as she had a tongue tie which meant she fed very inefficiently. We had that snipped at 3 weeks. I started co-sleeping as I was so tired I was falling asleep during night feeds while sitting up so wanted to do it more safely. There's no way I would have carried on BF otherwise and I actually got more sleep this way than with DC1.

BF became quicker and more convenient the older she got. I ended up breastfeeding for 18 months. I tried one bottle in the evening from about 4 weeks in but she turned out to also be intolerant to cow's milk and refused every bottle after the first feed, so I went dairy-free myself. I did find it was hard to leave her for any length of time because of this until she was established on solids.

I have no plans for any more but if I did I would aim to BF again as I enjoyed that more overall and ended up being more convenient. My perception of bottle feeding may have been coloured by DC1's terrible reflux though.

Whizziwig Thu 23-Nov-17 21:13:34

Forgot to say, despite barely sleeping for the first 3 months, the FF baby was overall a much better sleeper.

ZigZagandDustin Thu 23-Nov-17 21:14:21

I ebf to 4-6 weeks, then mix feed to 6-9 months.

Ff is sooooo much easier. I often think how pleasant those first weeks would be if I didn't have to go through the constant feeding, doubting about volume, split belleding nipples. But bf is better for the baby so I do it. By 6 weeks bf is going well enough that it's easy and by mix feeding I get great freedom so I think that's a great balance.

I've absolutely no criticism of people who choose to ff from the beginning.

PepperSteaks Thu 23-Nov-17 21:15:02

My milk couldn’t satisfy DD. I found it hard to eat because she was eating so often and it was a horrendous (at the time) cycle. I loved the closeness of it and miss it but I didn’t enjoy DD until she was FF. I felt like a new person over night knowing DH could help with feeding. I also felt like she was finally being satisfied and she started gaining weight properly. Also she has slept through the night every night since she’s been on formula. (She’s six months old)

GordonShakespeare Thu 23-Nov-17 21:15:05

I mix fed number one and Bf number two. Genuinely prefer bf. It's so easy and fits well around ds1. Both excellent sleepers and usually only needed the one night feed and would go straight back to sleep, so I'm not sure about the FF babies sleep better thing. When making ds1a bottle at night the slight delay between his waking and the bottle being ready usually meant he was much more awake.

Junebugjr Thu 23-Nov-17 21:22:38

Dc1- bottle fed, brilliant sleeper and was able to share the nightfeeds with DH if she did wake up.
The washing, sterilising and amount of paraphernalia though sad, and the smelly poos.
Dc2, breastfed. Never really slept, but the sheer bliss of never having to worry about washing fucking bottles, and did we have enough milk if we were going on an outing etc etc made up for it.

SprogletsMum Thu 23-Nov-17 21:25:13

I bf dc1 for 4 months dc2 for 28months dc3 for 15months and dc4 for 10 weeks.
I hate hate hate hate washing bottles but if I were to have another (I'm not, I'm done) I wouldn't bf past the first week or so.

SparkleFizz Thu 23-Nov-17 21:27:27

DS1 - couldn’t establish BF so bottle fed.

DS2 - BF until around 2yrs 9mths

DS3 - still BF at almost 12 mths.

I prefer BF. DS1 was the worst sleeper out of the 3 of them and I hated the FF night feeds, especially as DS1 refused to have milk unless it was warm. He’d be so upset by the time the milk was warm enough which was also upsetting for me.
BF night feeds have been so much faster and easier. Plus DH is a very heavy sleeper so I ended up doing all the FF night feeds myself anyway.

BF also much easier than FF when out and about, especially taking DS1’s refusal to drink cold formula into account.

I also found BF got easier as the baby got older. It’s an awful lot easier breastfeeding DS3 now than it was when he was a tiny baby.

Whatsthekey1 Thu 23-Nov-17 21:28:29

1st DS was EBF for 9 months and then switched to formula which was when he started sleeping beautifully.

2nd DS is 5 months and EBF and i’m hating it! He currently wakes every hour and refuses to take a bottle of breast milk or formula. I am so tired that i am just limping through most days and counting down until i can stop.

I know it’s not forever but when you’re in the sleep deprived phase i am currently in, i really regret BF!

GerrytheBerry Thu 23-Nov-17 21:29:38

Ds1 ff, terrible sleeper from birth, finally slept through at 18 months in his own bed.
Ds2 bf, terrible sleeper, woke every single night for boob into toddler hood. Finally slept through from his 3rd birthday weirdly.
Dd is almost 7 months and bf, slept amazingly until the dreaded 4 month sleep regression hit, and has coslept with me since then. She's only happy with me at her side, wants regular boob through the night.
I do prefer bf by a million miles but I think if I'm honest it's just the ease of it, no making bottles etc, can just go out and take baby and change bag and not worry about feeds and if I've brought enough, plus I hated getting up in the night with Ds1 making up a bottle half asleep.
I have friends that have bf babies that have been fantastic sleepers so I really don't think it's to do with how they're fed.
If you preferred ff then just go with that?

user1493413286 Thu 23-Nov-17 21:30:07

I had a love hate relationship with both breast and formula feeding. In the end I did half and half from 4 months and now at 7 months I just do formula. I loved the bonding of breastfeeding, the ease of it and the comfort it gave my baby but at a certain point I found it too much that no one else could do much and I found it incredibly physically draining.

Animation86 Thu 23-Nov-17 21:31:57

BF, I got more sleep. It was wonderful days.

HellsBellsnBucketsofBlood Thu 23-Nov-17 21:32:37

Dc1 bf for 9 months.

Dc2 bf for 5 months and then dd.

Bf was best when it worked. Easy, convenient, etc. I really thought I’d just bf any child I had.

But with dc2 it just didn’t work and was a massive source of stress, tiredness and mastitis. It was a relief to finally say screw it and deploy the bottles.

Purpleforest Thu 23-Nov-17 21:33:07

I bf both at first, but when they reached about 6 months they both started waking more at night and only suckling a little too drop back to sleep, then waking again an hour later. I tried a bottle and that was so much easier - they would drink the whole thing and back to sleep for the rest of the night.

I then mixed fed DC 1 for many months, which was great ,- best of both worlds as he had a nice full tummy (FF) at night, but still got the convenience of bf at other times.

DC2 once she'd tried bottles couldn't be bothered with BF any more, so we dropped it. She was about 8 months by then and I didn't mind.

I think children sleep differently, and also it's always harder with a second as you can't sleep when they do in the daytime.

If I was having another I'd bf at first - for health and because I enjoyed it and found it very convenient with a tiny one, but probably go over to FF at some point when I wanted a bit more of my own life back or if they started waking more at night and weren't suckling enough to fill themselves up properly in night feeds.

anothernetter Thu 23-Nov-17 21:33:20

DC1 was FF because he wouldn't BF (I tried for months). DC2 is BF. DC2 is definitely more happy and contented than DC1 and sleeps through most nights but I do not think this is because she is BF. I think that all babies are different and have their own personalities. Breast is best but my little boy doesn't seem to have suffered any ill effects because he was FF.

Addictedtothisbloodyforum Thu 23-Nov-17 21:38:58

Breast feeding without hesitation! The 2 I bf are much healthier than the 2 I ff ! it was harder bf but the benefits far out weigh the exhaustion, mastitis , baby only wanting me , feeding frenzies during growth spirts . My bf kids are far far healthier and have less illness than my ff two ? They are all amazing and I love them all the same

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