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House guests, love or loathe them?

(112 Posts)
pfrench Mon 20-Nov-17 13:30:48

I'm a loather. Other people's bathroom habits, snoring, stuff all over my house, certain guests just taking over the kitchen. Urgh.

whiskyowl Mon 20-Nov-17 13:32:44

It depends on the house, and on the guest!

I used to love having people to stay. Then I moved to a house where the kitchen was the size of a postage stamp, and it became a LOT less enjoyable.

TossDaily Mon 20-Nov-17 13:35:05


Three hours is my max. It's just too anxiety-inducing for me. I can't relax and find the whole experience completely draining.

allertse Mon 20-Nov-17 13:41:49

I love them. But I only invite people I like, so....

MayFayner Mon 20-Nov-17 13:45:09

Loathe. I had BIL and SIL a few Christmases ago. They were meant to stay 3 days but actually stayed for 10. God I was glad to see them go.

FuzzyCustard Mon 20-Nov-17 13:48:40

Happy with guests for coffee or tea or dinner but I have real difficulty with overnight guests.
I'd like to like it, but it gives me dreadful anxiety and panic attacks.

FilledSoda Mon 20-Nov-17 13:49:10

Hate it , I hate being one and I hate having one

DumbledoresPensieve Mon 20-Nov-17 13:49:15

I can tolerate, and even enjoy one night. Anymore than that, no!

Acrosstheuniverse123 Mon 20-Nov-17 13:49:33

I can't cope with it anymore. I used to enjoy it, but now I find it utterly exhausting and stressful. i wish I didn't , but i do.

kalinkafoxtrot45 Mon 20-Nov-17 13:50:39

Mostly love it, but only if they're fairly self sufficient. And they have to stay out of the kitchen when I'm cooking!

MsHarveySpecter Mon 20-Nov-17 13:52:50

Polite, clean, considerate guests who stay in a spare room, bring wine, help with clearing up and are good company - love them!

I wouldn't tolerate anyone taking over my kitchen and luckily the spare room has an en suite.

Wixi Mon 20-Nov-17 14:02:03

I don't really like house guests at all, I feel on edge and uncomfortable even if they only pop in for a coffee. I always feel that me and my house are being judged, even if it is perfectly tidy (unusual these days with an 8 year old), but find it very stressful, even family.

heron98 Mon 20-Nov-17 14:05:01

HATE them. I love my own space and even hate people staying late into the evening.

Unfortunately DP is the total opposite, always inviting people to crash on the sofa. It's the only thing we ever really row about.

I think IABU, and could do with chilling out, but I also think he could do with not being quite so hospitable!

lostpurplehoodie Mon 20-Nov-17 14:08:51

Loathe. I had a thread last week on one who turned up empty handed and then avoided us as long as he was here then brought a woman back. I appreciate he's peak cheeky houseguest but I can't relax with other people here - the extra mess and noise and constantly having to be "on". Hate it.

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser Mon 20-Nov-17 14:09:07

I like having guests, but it's also nice when they leave and you have the house to yourself again.

The Italians have a saying that can basically be translated as "guests are like fish: after three days they start to smell" grin Very apt!

SecretSmellies Mon 20-Nov-17 14:11:37

On the whole I loathe. But mainly because we live in a tourist town that is not too far from an airport and people like to use us 'as a base'.

I'm better at putting my foot down nowadays.

(And I have a CF story that I cannot even tell because no-one would ever believe me.)

Bluntness100 Mon 20-Nov-17 14:14:36

Yes I love it and have guests often and am one often, for the simple reason when we all socialise together we all like a few drinks so we stay over at each other’s houses. My house guests are always friends I wish to spend time with though.

FuzzyCustard Mon 20-Nov-17 14:15:24

secret oh you NEED to tell us. I promise to believe you!

monkeywithacowface Mon 20-Nov-17 14:16:52

Loathe it. Especially if children are involved.

LittleMissBrainy Mon 20-Nov-17 14:17:35

That's exactly what I was going to say!
My grandma used to say 'fish & visitors stink after three days!' ( I didn't realise it was an Italian saying) so I've always used that as a rule for me. One night is fine, two nights ok, three if you must but any more than that is rude!
I personally wouldn't mind it as much if I were living in my dream house (huge farmhouse on a 6-20 acre site), but in my current house with only 2 rooms downstairs, I'm not so keen.

DJBaggySmalls Mon 20-Nov-17 14:17:53

I would rather sleep on a motel carpet than someone elses house. And I would rather have your dog stay for the weekend than you. At least he wont flush the toilet at bastard o'clock.
SecretSmellies you cannot tease like that. You have to tell.

Delatron Mon 20-Nov-17 14:19:22

It's just so exhausting! The manic cleaning beforehand, washing all the bedding and towels (yes I could be more organised but I seem to be forever doing laundry). Working out what to cook, getting in all the food and wine.

Doesn't help that DH does bugger all. Last time he decided to organise the top of a chest of drawers, claiming he is helping, whilst there are loos to clean. Massive avoidance technique.

I'm very selective about who stays this days.

AsMuchUseAsAMarzipanDildo Mon 20-Nov-17 14:21:20

If they’re obviously relaxed and help themselves to tea (even better make me one!), great. If they’re the sort to stand on ceremony and expect you to entertain them, no.

SecretSmellies Mon 20-Nov-17 14:23:46

I have not even been able to tell DH.

I met DH 15 odd years ago. Every summer his house that became ours would be filled to the bloody brim with his friends over the summer periods. I moved into his house, so did not feel it was my place to argue, even though some of his friends were pretty high maintenance. We had one summer where we had 11 consecutive weeks of people staying. They were jetting off to a summer holiday and using us for a night before /night back scenario. (near airport). Or, before the Olympics where we were near an event we had people dossing down who neither I nor DH had even ever met and so forth, but were usually friends of friends.

About 3 months ago we had an old friend of DH's for dinner over. DH can't cope with alcohol and he went to bed early. I stayed up to be polite to his friend. After being very very well-lubricated DH's friend said with a laugh;'Did you ever realise I've been subletting your spare room out all this time'?

DH would be destroyed. He is very generous and giving. I used to let any friend of his friend's stay, out of loyalty to my DH and his friendships (I have always thought this parti friend was a slimy fucker).

I can't tell DH. I can't. I have no compunction though about folding up the welcome mat though next year.

flutterby12 Mon 20-Nov-17 14:24:55

Depends who it is.

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