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how did you meet your DH/OH and was it completely random?

(73 Posts)
azimazi Sat 18-Nov-17 21:08:18

trying to meet a man for years, tried online dating (rubbish), socialising (ends up with a hangover or drunken snog / mistake), doing new activities etc. Even asked guys out! Nothing other than passing fling has materialised and been single for what feels like an age.

Not met anyone I felt a real "click" with... part of me wants give up looking, but am lonely and bored (it's been 4 years now). AFAIK nothing wrong with me - think I am attractive, intelligent, independent, and got a lot to give the right person.

To give me some inspiration please tell me how you met your OH / love of your life and was it completely random, did you stop looking, was it online dating? did you try new things? As all my attempts seem to end in failure so far would love to hear others stories about the moment they met their OH and how it happened...

Ellapaella Sat 18-Nov-17 21:23:25

I met mine at work. We worked together for a few months together before we had a snog on a night out and we arranged another date, then our fate was sealed. I fancied him as soon as I first saw him and used to plot ways to get him to ask me out long before the night of our first snog. He later told me he had fancied the pants off me too, long before that night.
It wasn’t just looks, it was obvious there was a chemistry between us and he was just so funny, we went out on a date and just had a really good time, conversation was so easy and we had a really good laugh together. 14 years and two dc on now and still fancy the pants off each other.
Before him I had a few bad apples. I didn’t know how much shit I had put up with from men until I met DH and realised that not all men were twats.

inappropriateraspberry Sat 18-Nov-17 21:41:32

Friend of a friend on a night out. Was VERY drunk, but he asked for my number and we went on a date. Together for 10 years now, married for 4, one daughter and expecting in Feb! I just decided not to be so picky and be open minded. So I gave my number if asked, went on dates and gave people a chance! Obv didn’t always work out, but eventually you do meet the right person.
I am glad I don’t have to go through all the tinder stuff etc. Seems to have complicated things I reckon.

Justbookedasummmerholiday Sat 18-Nov-17 21:44:13

Had an odd urge to go to a particular wine bar one night, met him at the bar as we ordered drinks, both with a mate each, mates left and we stood chatting, shared a taxi home as both lived only streets apart. Gave him my number and not had a night apart in 5 years since that first night!! Married with a toddler now!!

Breezy1985 Sat 18-Nov-17 21:45:27

Tinder. I only joined because I was bored one Saturday night, deleted it the next day but gave him my number before, we met a couple of days after and been together almost 2 years. We're moving in together next month smile

Floralnomad Sat 18-Nov-17 21:45:43

Met my dh in a nightclub in 1985 , he asked me to dance and we’ve been together since .

dodi1978 Sat 18-Nov-17 21:51:10

Tried online dating, no success. Tried various activities, including meet-up club for the over 30s - only meed weirdos.
Decided to start rowing as I fancied the idea. On introductory night for beginners at the local rowing club I started chatting to a guy an after five minutes found myself staring at his fingers to figure out whether he was married!
Two weeks later we chatted whilst we waited for our introductory 10 minutes on a boat. After the session, he asked whether I fancied a drink and a bite at the pub next door. I did. Their card reader didn't work so we had to throw together whatever few pennies of cash we had for a drink each and a shared plate of Nachos.
Hardly spent any time apart after that, moved in with each other 10 months later, now married with two DC! It can all happen all of a sudden!

LipstickHandbagCoffee Sat 18-Nov-17 21:51:33

Met the usual way,students in a club.dated through uni and still an item.was kaboom moment
Maintained own mates & interests.werent annoyingly joined at hip
Didn’t want to end as like smug marrieds.and we haven’t

Needadvicetoleave Sat 18-Nov-17 21:54:21

Tagged along to the pub with a friend (A) as I was bored and lonely, having recently broken up with the love of my life (or so I thought). I vaguely knew As friend (B). B brought her friend (C) which A didn't know was going to happen.

C is now DH.

Totally random and totally unexpected.

sooperdooper Sat 18-Nov-17 21:58:03

At a meet up for an online forum about 9 years ago, I only went because it happened to be organised for near where I lived and I didn't have plans that night, expected they'd all be weirdos and I'd be home in a couple of hrs

I married DH 5 years ago and a lot of the others are now some of my best friends

azimazi Sat 18-Nov-17 21:58:29

ahh thanks everyone, what kind of feeling did you get when you set eyes on them? was it instantaneous attraction? love at first sight? did it take a while to develop...?

StillMedusa Sat 18-Nov-17 22:00:43

I was on holiday in Malta with my family. Noticed this guy swinging back on his chair and being told off by his mother!
Started chatting in the pool. I was 20, he was 26. We are now about to turn 50 and 56 grin

Holiday romances can last!!

Doilooklikeatourist Sat 18-Nov-17 22:01:40

My mum knew his step mum
They had a conversation about lovely son/ daughter
They set us up basically
Been married nearly 25 years

Frouby Sat 18-Nov-17 22:02:48

Met my dp in a club in 1999. My mate copped off with his mate and we all went back to my mates flat. Me and dp had a fling that lasted about a month then fizzled out but we saw each other occasionally while out and shared drugs and were friendly with the odd night together.

Saw him last in about 2001. Met a serious boyfriend who broke my heart that night and after serious boyfriend dumped me I moved away for a bit. Met another knobhead, fell pg and had dd, moved back home and dd was almost 2 when I met dp again outside a kebab shop after a shit night out. We got talking, him and his mate came back to mine with me and my mate and I put it down to a nice night with an old mate.

We have been together nearly 11 years now. Have a ds together who is 4 and we get married next May.

So the short answer is in a club. Then outside a kebab shop. I definitely wasnt looking tho. Wanted chips and çheese not a long term relationship!

ScaryDuck Sat 18-Nov-17 22:06:13

I met mine at work, but didn't get together til 3 years later after I'd moved jobs. I never thought much of him when we worked together but when we met again, it just clicked.

LipstickHandbagCoffee Sat 18-Nov-17 22:06:58

Kaboom,instant need to be with him.talked for bulk of night& exchanged no’s
Similar shared vales,politics,aspirations.different background.hes posh, I’m scheme
Importantly we have never been coupley or gushy.or over dependent on each other

Doilooklikeatourist Sat 18-Nov-17 22:07:03

Answer to follow up question
We just got on , went to the cinema on our first date , he phoned me the next day ( I’d just booked around the world air ticket )

Cancelled that , was engaged within 6 weeks , got married 6 months later ,
I still haven’t been round the world , but ?....one day ....

Biboundeo Sat 18-Nov-17 22:10:26

Met online, went to the pub for a date, he walked in, I thought no way I’ll ever sleep with this boring IT guy. But we had loads in common and I agreed to see him another time as friends. Then somehow we kissed and it was the best snog ever. So we married and had 2 kids.

welshweasel Sat 18-Nov-17 22:12:38

I'd done all the speed dating, on line dating etc. Had plenty of relationships but nothing serious. Met my husband in the pub after a rugby match. Invited him to join us for a game of jenga, he ordered a bottle of wine and the rest is history!

Rankellior Sat 18-Nov-17 22:13:24

Another one who met as students drunk in a club, arranged a date and 15 years later still together. Our paths had met a few times before due to mutual friends but only brief passing moments. I often wonder how different life would have been had I not gone out that night (or gone home early with my drunk friend)

Other friends have met in clubs, online dating, through friends, through work. All seems very random

BexleyRae Sat 18-Nov-17 22:15:06

Met by DP on my way home on New year's eve. He apparently saw me in the working men's club (think like Phoenix nights) but didn't want to approach me as I was with my parents. Yes, my life is so glam i went out on NYE with my parents. So he waited in the street when I left to ask for my number. I thought hmmmm you're not to bad looking and he came back to mine for a coffee

Topseyt Sat 18-Nov-17 22:16:34

It was random. Quite by chance.

I was a student in a shared house with two other girls and we had an additional room in our house which we needed to let in order to reduce what we would have to pay in rent. So we advertised it on a notice board at the university (no internet, this was the eighties.

We didn't even have a phone so respondents had to just turn up and knock at the door. One if those was DH, and he took the room.

I think we just gradually grew on each other. I don't think we were initially that enamoured with each other, but that changed during that academic year.

We have now been married for 24 years and have three DDs aged 22, 19 and 15.

Sarahjconnor Sat 18-Nov-17 22:18:02

I moved into a shared house to attend uni when I was 18. I walked out on the first morning and he was sitting on the steps of the house opposite and I just starred at the most handsome man I'd ever seen. I didn't know it was group home for foster kids (he was also 18 and in his last year)! 24 years later we're very happy. Ahhh beautiful fate smile

littlemissneela Sat 18-Nov-17 22:20:52

My dh was good friends with someone from our group. Several of my friends had met him already and told me about this really funny guy etc. Anyway, he had a toga party at his parents holiday cottage which we all went to and I finally got to meet him. The first time I saw him he was doing pull ups on the living room door frame! Took us another 5 or so months to see each other again (both ver ver shy) and then another week before he asked me out. The rest, as they say, is history smile

Winterflower84 Sat 18-Nov-17 22:21:04

Completely random. I am a film-maker and interviewed DH in that capacity. When he invited me out for a coffee the next day, I thought no way, it's beyond unprofessional. So refused. Our first date was 3 months later. Dated 2 years, have been married for 4, one DD.

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