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I hate myself

(16 Posts)
GetYourHandsOffMyUnicorn Sat 21-Oct-17 22:49:01

All I do is upset people and annoy them.

I feel like nobody actually likes me and that they're just pretending they do but really think I'm annoying.

I have a 3 week old DS and even he doesn't like me sad.

Santawontbelong Sat 21-Oct-17 22:50:46

Sleep deprivation plays weird games with your mind.
Confide in your health visitor who can be a great support in the early days.
And to your ds you are the best thing ever!!

Sugarpiehoneyeye Sat 21-Oct-17 22:54:00

There is nothing surer, than your little baby loves you.
Maybe you have post natal depression, or a touch of the baby blues.
Please speak out, to your GP, or Health visitor.
Everything will be okay, but a little support, goes a long way.💐

GetYourHandsOffMyUnicorn Sat 21-Oct-17 22:54:23

Yes i am very sleep deprived. I constantly feel on edge.

dantdmistedious Sat 21-Oct-17 22:55:13

Sleep deprivation. Where’s the baby’s dad is he helping, family support?

Wolfiefan Sat 21-Oct-17 22:55:34

You sound really unhappy. Any chance it's anxiety/depression? You are your baby's whole world right now. Love doesn't even start to cover it.

GetYourHandsOffMyUnicorn Sat 21-Oct-17 23:16:26

His dad is around and is very supportive. Right now he is in bed as he has to be up early in the morning.

Am probably being silly.

Wolfiefan Sat 21-Oct-17 23:31:54

I don't think you are at all. You sound a bit overwhelmed. Please chat to your MW or GP. Could be an element on PND here.

RabbitSaysWoof Sat 21-Oct-17 23:35:36

I had feelings like that about how other people perceive me when my ds was very small, I was fine in every other way, but I thought I annoyed people. If I text someone and they didn't get back to me that day I would think they are ignoring me, If someone couldn't make it for a meet up I'd think it's because I annoy them.
Looking back afterwards I thought maybe I had too much time on my hands on maternity leave, but maybe it was something more post natal.

RavenclawRealist Sat 21-Oct-17 23:42:24

I agree with pp sleep deprivation is awful! As are hormones post birth! You aren’t silly at all you DS loves you as do many others I’m sure! Talk to your DP, family, close friends or your health visitor whoever you feel most comfortable with. You are not alone! Let those closest to be ou help.

WhatWouldGenghisDo Sat 21-Oct-17 23:45:54

I was having a lot of thoughts like this when I was really sleep deprived with the babies.

Your DS thinks you are the whole world. He's just finding it hard to cope with being born, he's not used to it yet.

I suggest plan A: get more sleep (discuss ways and means with your oh ASAP) and plan B: if you're still feeling like this in a week, or if you start to feel worse in the meantime, talk it over with the dr.

aintnothinbutagstring Sun 22-Oct-17 00:16:35

You are your baby's world, there is no one more important to him than you. If he is grumpy, its mostly one of three things, he's hungry, tired (and can't sleep/settle), needs a poo/wind. They're pretty simple creatures babies are, you can't always fix the crying, frustrating though it is. Get sleep when you can, even a short nap can work wonders, you will have to retrain your sleep pattern out of that 8hr block you used to get before children and train yourself to accept shorter but frequent sleeps. Nap when the baby naps, I know its hard because you'll want to catch up on things but right now its about survival and you're fine to let housework etc. slip flowers

AnonEvent Sun 22-Oct-17 00:27:29

Congratulations on your new baby.

When DD was ten days old I wondered if I'd actually have to die in order to send her to an orphanage. I Googled the words 'why does my baby hate me?', DH and I slept in 4 hour shifts and during my shift I just sat on the sofa, holding DD and weeping at the interminability of it all. DH went back to work, his world was 'normal' again, and I was struggling.

I was exhausted, I was overwhelmed and I was overrun with hormones and emotions that my body just didn't know what to do with.

Believe me, it gets better, I wasn't depressed or otherwise unwell, it was just the scale and enormity of the change in my life.

By six weeks or so, DD and I got into a little routine and I could better anticipate her needs, she cried less, I slept more, feeding became easier, everything started to straighten out.

Now she's a year old, and feeling like you do now feels like a distant memory.

Of course, seek support from friends/family/partner and HV/MWs but be kind to yourself, as a PP said, you are your DC's world, feeling alone and overwrought right now is very very normal.

intergalacticbrexitdisco Sun 22-Oct-17 00:28:34

You've just had a baby. Everything is weird and new for you both. You are getting to know each other. Your body is full of strange hormones, doing strange things.

So please, don't hate yourself. One step at a time. It is very early days.

ItsLeviosah Sun 22-Oct-17 12:15:28

Remember a 3 week old baby can’t show proper emotion to you.
In a couple of weeks he will start to smile at you and it’s lovely.
A few months after that he will raise his arms to be lifted Les up by you and cuddle into your shoulder when he sees someone he doesn’t know.

Eebahgum Sun 22-Oct-17 12:21:42

Just wanted to agree with pp- seek support for this. Sleep deprivation plays tricks with your mind. I guarantee no one would waste the energy pretending to like someone - trust that they really do like you. And you are the centre of ds's world - in a couple of years time he'll be giving you the best squidgy cuddles and telling you he loves you and that pure unconditional love is the BEST thing ever!

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