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I think my 5 yo dd has a crush!

(42 Posts)
crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 21:15:50

For the past week my 5 year old dd has gone on and on about an older boy in her school. At first I thought nothing of it but she brings his name into almost every conversation. I said to her earlier do you like X more than me and she replied that she does like him but not more than me. Is this normal behaviour for 5 year olds? I was hoping to have a few more years before I had to worry about boys confused

CaoNiMwahaha Fri 20-Oct-17 21:34:57

It's not a crush. Don't be absurd!

With all the weirdos on here lately, this could be construed badly.

Shoot me for troll hunting. I don't care.

crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 21:42:06

I’m a bit confused by what you mean. Do you suspect I’m a troll? I’m genuinely asking if this is normal 5 year old behaviour. I’m not that sad to be sat at home pretending to be someone I’m not!

NNchangedforthis Fri 20-Oct-17 21:46:00

I know what you mean OP, my daughter definitely has an admiration for her friends 14 year old brother. He is very good with wee kids, always entertaining then when we go round etc, takes time and always talks to her, doesn’t just dismiss her as I’m sure other 14 year olds would! She always asks now if he’ll be at certain things and has decided she wants him at her birthday party.

Soubriquet Fri 20-Oct-17 21:47:06

Would you say the same thing if it was a girl?

It's the child's best friend that's all

BeerBaby Fri 20-Oct-17 21:51:42

I had a crush at 4. My friends older brother. I didn't know what it was but I loved him and thought he was great. I'd blush when I saw him.

crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 21:52:27

The boy is actually 8 so a bit older than dd. She said they play with him at playtime. I don’t know if they follow him around or he actually has started playing with them.

RebelFreddyVSRogueJason Fri 20-Oct-17 21:53:39

Why wouldn’t it be normal?
And “worrying about boys” when you’re talking about 5 yos is creepy tbh.

RefuseTheLies Fri 20-Oct-17 21:55:18

I had a crush on a boy in my class at school when I was four. I liked him because he had curly hair and really neat handwriting grin

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar Fri 20-Oct-17 21:55:51

Worry about boys... confused. It's a 5 and an 8 year old, fgs, get a grip.

crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 21:56:32

I don’t think I’m being ‘creepy’ rebel, just wondering if it’s normal as I don’t think I acted like this at that age.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar Fri 20-Oct-17 21:58:06

You are being creepy. Would you say the same if it was an 8 year old girl she looked up to?

SeamusMacDubh Fri 20-Oct-17 22:02:58

I don't think the OP is being creepy.

OP, I would say it is normal for children to like/befriend/admire other children of a range of ages. I wouldn't worry about it. If you really can't get it off your mind you could say something to DD's teacher like "it's so nice DD has settled so well this term and that she has some special friends. She talks about X all the time!" as a conversation starter.

RippleEffects Fri 20-Oct-17 22:03:42

Its really normal behaviour but the word crush probably isn't quite the right one.

When they're little and start to be exposed to the bigger world they're exposed to all sorts or interesting seemingly all knowledgeable people. It can be a teacher and all you here is Mrs X says, Mrs X likes, Mrs X, Mrs X, Mrs blomming X or a sibling of a class mate or elder child who seams all worldly from the playground.

bastardkitty Fri 20-Oct-17 22:05:10

It's completely normal behaviour and I'd say crush is exactly the right word.

Pennywhistle Fri 20-Oct-17 22:05:22

You might want to think carefully about you talk about this kind of stuff in future. “Do you like him more than me?” feels like an inappropriate question to me.

You’re her Mother, other course she doesn’t like some random boy more than you. The question feels like it’s putting unnecessary significance on this friendship.

Depending on how your DD views it, it might prevent her telling you about boys she likes in future.

I have both a DD and a DS. They’ve both had friends of the opposite sex over the years that they’ve taken a particular shine to.

We’ve always been careful never to tease them about these friends and treat the whole thing very casually.

At 10 yo they are still telling us who they like and I hope they’ll still be able to talk to us as they move towards their teenage years.

user1487175389 Fri 20-Oct-17 22:10:11

You'd be better off reading some books on child development than posting here tbh. People are very wary at the moment.

crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 22:11:18

When I asked her if she liked him more than me it was said as a very obvious joke which we both laughed about. She’s had many friends of her age that are boys. She gets on equally well with both boys and girls. It’s only as he’s that bit older and I just assumed an 8 year old would rather play with kids his own age as opposed to girls 3 years younger. When I was at school an 8 year old would be embarrassed to be playing with a 5 year old. Maybe times have changed.

Fitzsimmons Fri 20-Oct-17 22:11:28

I had a crush when I was five. I used to imagine scenarios where he had to rescue me from monsters grin

SeamusMacDubh Fri 20-Oct-17 22:12:59

OP, I don't mean this to come off judgey or accusatory but are you maybe a little paranoid after hearing something in the media lately? I heard about peer sexual abuse in primary schools on Jeremy Vine's BBCR2 programme last week and it has stayed with me, wasn't something that had even occurred to me before!

I stick by my previous post that your DD's new friendship/admiration is perfectly normal and nothing to worry about.

Namechanger2015 Fri 20-Oct-17 22:15:52

My 5yo DD has a crush on a boy in her class. When we see him on the walk in to school she tells me ‘mummy my smiling teeth have come out and I can’t stop smiling now’

It’s very cute, I love seeing her little face light up this way!

My older DD had a few crushes when she first started school, she is now 10 and really not fussed about boys at all.

It’s very normal!

May50 Fri 20-Oct-17 22:24:46

I remember my first crush was when I was 7, on a boy I think who was the year above me. I was very silly and giggly around him!

crispwhites Fri 20-Oct-17 22:24:51

Namechanger that is very cute smile

Pennywhistle Fri 20-Oct-17 22:35:57

If it was a joke I’m not sure why it was relevant to your OP.

Regardless, perhaps the boy is just kind.

My DS is a very nice looking boy and is regularly subject to adoring glances from friends’ little sisters. He’s rather bewildered by the attention but is always kind and wouldn’t ignore them if they spoke to him in the playground.

Figgygal Fri 20-Oct-17 22:42:54

What is up with everyone tonight?? Sheesh

My 5 year old ds is in year 1 and has alternated between marrying 2 classmates since reception at the moment he talks endlessly about one and draws pictures of them holding hands in a submarine or at the park. He's had love notes from his "girlfriend" no idea where it comes from but the whole class is obsessed with who they're marrying.

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