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Anyone else a 'social chameleon'?

(9 Posts)
Lexiconlessons Sat 23-Sep-17 21:53:07

What do you take this description to mean? I've always excelled in my ability to relate to and get on with people from a diverse range of backgrounds. Not blowing my own trumpet at all and to be truthful it has been an asset in my career working with people in mental health. I moved around a lot as a child. So I was often the 'new kid'...I am confident in who I am but I often find myself adapting in role (and chat) according to who I'm talking to. Is this normal?! I question my integrity at times. Existential Crisis!! Or is this ok?

Mollypolly2610 Sat 23-Sep-17 22:23:00

I would imagine (like me) some people change their personality to deal with different people. But then I am a people pleaser so change to suit others. Maybe a bit of a wimp then. I am sure other people do this to fit in with different people. Or tell me I am wrong.

BulletFox Sat 23-Sep-17 22:25:32

It just sounds like you have a skill at adapting/reading people. It could be worse, I sometimes temporarily pick up accents!

Lexiconlessons Sat 23-Sep-17 22:31:42

BulletFox..I do this too. Hence questioning my integrity and bigger questions like "who the fuck AM I?"

Lexiconlessons Sat 23-Sep-17 22:34:24

A giant sponge perhaps?! confused

TheScottishPlay Sat 23-Sep-17 22:37:27

I do this too. Similar job as well.

CotswoldStrife Sat 23-Sep-17 22:53:10

Well I think there is a difference between adapting your conversation, say, so you have something to talk about versus developing a completely new interest purely because a friend does it.

Finding a common interest - fine IMO. Suddenly developing an interest in obscure items that you have never mentioned before X came in to your life - chameleon I'm thinking of a friend who changes according to the current male she is seeing

Lexiconlessons Sat 23-Sep-17 23:10:45

Cotswold, I am definitely and truthfully talking about things I have a genuine opinion on and certainly not swaying in the sense you describe. Sounds like a true horror show what you describe in your friend

CotswoldStrife Sun 24-Sep-17 21:45:31

I think that's a good thing Lexicon and you are being polite, some people are good at listening picking up hints and reading between the lines of what peopl!e are saying to catch their interests and keep the conversation going (or starting, in some cases).

A friend of a friend liked to establish common ground to talk about but used to do it by quizzing you 'do you like/watch/go to x' which was effective, but not as subtle as you and a bit wearing after a bit tbh.

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