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Is there such thing as wiaitng room etiquette?

(614 Posts)
Apfelbunny Thu 16-Mar-17 19:55:43

I know it goes without saying if you're on your phone or playing music loudly you'll get tutted at loudly and maybe told to shut up (and rightly so)
The same goes for eating offensively smelly food or general bad manners (like belching the national anthem or smearing bogeys on the windows)

Here's the grey area...
What about babies?
I know a crying baby is annoying.
But what about a happy one?

I was waiting for a doctor appointment and was sat in the waiting room with my 6 month old.
There was me, a 40ish yr old woman, a 70ish yr old woman and a middle aged man.
One on their phone, one reading a book and another doing thumb twiddling (possibly wishing they brought something to do)

Anyway, my baby wanted out of the buggy for a cuddle and to look around at the new sights. Which is fine an non offensive.
Then my 6 month old decides to get very noisy (in a happy squealing way, i don't think babies have volume control do they)
In the long wait for us to be called the little monster decided to blow raspberries (loudly), babble at me, giggle, eat my face and generally be pretty damned cute.

Except we got eye rolled at and stared at by one member of the waiting room. Not the man. It made me think - what did they want me to do? I'm not about to ignore a 6 month old who has no concept of what socially acceptable, i didn't stick a dummy in because i just didn't.

What's the unwritten rule here?
I know with crying babies you have to at least show you're trying everything even if you know nothing will work and they're fed up of waiting.

Apfelbunny Thu 16-Mar-17 19:56:26

Sorry for any typos, like in the title. This phone hates me.

dustarr73 Thu 16-Mar-17 19:57:42

They sound miserable and your baby sounds adorable

amysmummy12345 Thu 16-Mar-17 19:58:01

Take no notice.

Sirzy Thu 16-Mar-17 19:59:35

In a waiting room though you don't know why they are there. Could easily be a very valid reason they aren't over the moon at noise.

I think the polite thing to do is try to keep noise to a minimum

Apfelbunny Thu 16-Mar-17 20:00:09

Lol, thanks dustarr. I was wondering if i was somehow weird for playing along with my baby or whether i had to pretend to be an adult.
Sometimes it's easier being like a baby than like an adult. Adults don't like you blowing raspberries on their cheeks.

Sparklingbrook Thu 16-Mar-17 20:01:03

I think if you at the Doctors and not feeling well your patience for stuff is probably a bit low.

sonjadog Thu 16-Mar-17 20:01:10

I think you were behaving fine and the person was being grumpy. On the other hand, in the doctor's waiting room will be people who aren't feeling well and that will make them grumpier and less tolerant than usual, so I wouldn't hold it against someone for being a bit miserable about it.

Apfelbunny Thu 16-Mar-17 20:01:28

Seriously though, if anyone knows how to turn the volume down on a baby I'd love to know the secret! This one is stuck on noisy - especially at 2am!

dustarr73 Thu 16-Mar-17 20:02:49

Sirzy with a toddler maybe but not a 6 month old.If the baby was crying I would remove them.But a babbling happy baby is lovely.Maybe the other people should have blown raspberries rather than moaning.

Annesmyth123 Thu 16-Mar-17 20:03:30

I wouldn't let a baby be really noisy in a doctors waiting room. I mean a 6 month old can't help it but the person didn't actually say anything did they. They might be waiting for bad news

TheUpsideDown Thu 16-Mar-17 20:03:53

Ignore it. Who rolls their eyes at a happy giggly sweet baby?! What a grumpy bastard.

Annesmyth123 Thu 16-Mar-17 20:04:56

I certainly wouldn't do Noisy parenting in a doctors I'd try to keep it down a bit, if I could. It's a bit insensitive not to be mindful of that other people might not be feeling great.

PunjanaTea Thu 16-Mar-17 20:05:06

Well babies are babies and they obviously don't know how to behave but you're an adult and you do, so perhaps less joining in and encouraging the raspberries and squeals and more empathy with those in the doctors waiting room who could have all manner of reasons for wanting a bit of peace and quiet.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:06:38

People at the doctors could have all kinds of illnesses or expecting bad news etc. It can't be helped but you have to expect some people to roll their eyes.

And tbf you aren't going to get the 'person on the street' view on what is predominantly a patently site!

Apfelbunny Thu 16-Mar-17 20:06:59

I know. Im not really holding anything against anyone. Doctors waiting rooms are awful.
I was sort of feeling a bit weird for being made to feel like i should of done something. They actually go up and moved away and sat glaring at me. I smiled apologetically at them. Well, as much as i could do with a baby who had their mouth over my eye and their hands in my ears.

Annesmyth123 Thu 16-Mar-17 20:08:06

I was at the doctors this week and there was a middle aged man. Visibly distressed. Wringing his hands with paperwork in them. He was really upset and struggling to hold it together.

He was there to get some forms signed to cremate his wife. I know because i know him and I went to offer my condolences.

I know that's extreme. But you just don't know.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:08:19

So people who could be in pain, depressed, seriously ill etc are 'grumpy bastards' because they don't delight in a happy but noisy baby?

Wow.

hippyhippyshake Thu 16-Mar-17 20:09:02

Happy giggly baby? Op said very loud squealing baby. For the first few minutes I expect everyone adored him/her. It's when it goes on and on and on and encouraged by the parent that it becomes tedious. And if it's anything like my doctor's surgery it could be for an hour or so! 😱

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:09:10

They didn't say anything though? They moved away because they didn't like the noise - I can't believe that makes them unreasonable!

NavyandWhite Thu 16-Mar-17 20:09:11

Well nobody is at the doctors because they're well! There could be hundreds of different reasons why the woman rolled her eyes.

Your baby does sound lovely though smile

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:10:26

I always get the rage in the waiting room anyway - I hate going to the GP and I get really wound up beforehand blush

I would have moved away if I had been them - nothing personal, just uncomfortable.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:10:50

And don't forget some people just don't like babies!

Witchend Thu 16-Mar-17 20:10:54

What you have to realise in that in a waiting room you may have any of the following:
1. Person there who has struggled to get there with a chronic illness, feeling exhausted just from being there.
2. Person who knows the appointment may bring life changing news-including possibly life expectancy
3. Person who is just feeling really ill and any noise is painful
4. Person who is there to discuss something which is painful for them (eg infertility, suicide attempt of loved one, depression etc)
5. Person who is there to ask for more information/further referral after news of a life changing diagnosis.

I'm with you on the baby can't be expected to be quiet, and a happy baby is better than a crying one but:
In the long wait for us to be called the little monster decided to blow raspberries (loudly), babble at me, giggle, eat my face and generally be pretty damned cute.
actually comes across as rather unaware that the other people there don't have to share your opinion of your baby.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta Thu 16-Mar-17 20:12:42

Some people would have found your baby cute. The ones who didn't, moved.

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