Think the kids may be disapointed this year

[MrsSnape]

I know I'm being a bit daft with this...

But every year the kids wake up to a living room FULL of presents. I mean, you litrally cannot walk around, there are presents EVERYWHERE.

I always spend a stupid fortune on them, buying loads of stuff that I know deep down they won't bother with after 5 minutes and their grandma always buys them LOADS...as in car fulls of presents too.

After last year, ANOTHER year where the kids only bothered with the console games and nothing else...I decided enough was enough and I wouldn't be buying them much this year. Plus we're saving for a holiday so I've told them not to expect much.

So basically I've bought them a Wii to share. A few xbox 360 games, a few wii games, a couple of DVDs and clothes. Everything I have bought them is hidden behind the computer desk and nobody has noticed...that's how small the 'stash' is but I thought "it will still seem like they have loads when MIL buys her usual masses..."

Anyway MIL has just told me that she doesn't intend on buying anyone presents this year, she's just giving money instead so they can buy what they want.

So what is usually an entire room filled with presents is going to be a room with two small piles of presents.

I've told them they won't be getting much but at 7 and 9, I think they're still a bit young to realise why things are different this year.

Am I being daft?

[lucysmam]

Nope, that's more than we'll have between us! & I don't care any more. We're having a home-made xmas this year after lots of fab advice on my thread

Maybe get them a stocking & fill with bits and pieces for them to open but I don't think they would be ungrateful looking at what you've listed, I wouldn't be anyways

Plus, if MIL is giving them money, you could build up to going sale shopping & they'll get more for their money than they would have as pressies

[MrsSnape]

They will also have a stocking

I think DS2 is expecting a playstation 3 . He told me he wanted one and I said "no you won't be getting that, they're too expensive" so he smiled and said "I know YOU can't get me on, but father christmas will!"

I told him again that he wouldn't be getting one but a few days later I was asked by a parent at school how much I'd paid for "the ps3" as her kids want one!! I said "what ps3??" so she said "oh, well your DS has told his friends that he's getting one for christmas, I thought you may have bought it already"

[TheProvincialLady]

I think it is healthy for them to realise that money is a finite resource and that they can't just expect or ask for something only for it to magically appear. I think at their ages they can start to understand that this year will be tighter than usual for whatever reasons. You don't want to raise children who equate love with gifts and you don't want to them to think it is necessary to bankrupt yourself to have things. I think you are being very sensible and actually, your children will still be getting a lot. Just imagine what you would have to buy them in 5 years time to keep them happy if you kept this up!

[Notquitegrownup]

Mrs Snape, if it's any help, I told my dss that after a certain age (it was 5 for us) Father Christmas only brings stockings. Parents or grandparents by the rest. If your ds is young enough to still believe in FC, he is young enough to be convinced of that too. We had friends who, from the start, told their dcs that FC only does stockings - it does make life easier.

We are going for the Wii as a shared present this year too, with Grandparents buying the extra controller etc. It's enough with a stocking too.

[mumblechum]

Sounds like you won't have much change out of £800, plus whatever your mum gives them.

TBH, £400 plus per child sounds like a lot of money to me.

[fumf]

my two also have birthdsays close to xmas. I have catagorically told them they will have nice birthday pressies but small, inexpensive xmas gifts this year.

[LackaDAISYcal]

We have explained to DS (6.5) that the parents buy the presents, and then Santa takes them away to deliver them on Christmas Eve, otherwisw he was expecting shed loads as well and we just can't justify it in the present climate, especially as I'm on SMP.

similarly we have bought a Wii to share so he will bet some games for that plus some other bits and pieces to open as well.

We feel into the trap of spending waaaaay too much on him when he was little and an only child whose parents were separated. Now we are back together with another one and one imminent, we just can't afford it.

but, it's what you make it isn't it? We have a fab day of fun and games planned so are hoping that he will remember that, rather than be disappointed by what he didn't get.

[lizziemun]

LackaDAISYcal

I have said almost the same to dd1 (4.10) i have told that mummy and daddy have to give father christmas money towards the presents he brings so she may not get everything that she would like.

[bobblehat]

Glad I'm not the only one worrying!

Usually we have a room full of presents, but this year, not only are finances tighter, but the things my ds's want are just smaller, eg ds games, although pricy, just don't wrap up very big.

I've usually started getting a few bits by now but this year I'm going to be making lists and sticking to them. Also, as the boys are getting bigger, they'll start noticing that present piles are different sizes, so I'm being strict - ds one has a book, so ds 2 will also have a book, and so on.

[seeker]

So they've already got an xbox and you're buying them a Wii - and you think they'll be disappointed?

[bobsyouruncle]

my dd (5) wants a nintendo ds and she isn't getting one. Too expensive and I think she's too young. But she's convinced herself that now she's at school and learned to write "nintendo ds" on her santa letter that she'll get it!? Don't want her to be disappointed, but she'll have lots of other presents to open.

[expatinscotland]

'So basically I've bought them a Wii to share. A few xbox 360 games, a few wii games, a couple of DVDs and clothes. '

A few of each? Those things are each at least £20 a pop unless they were pre-owned.

That is WAY more than most 7-9 year olds get I would think.

Now's the time when they get into the habit of having only one BIG present and then learn to enjoy the holiday in other ways - chocolate binge, activities, etc.

I grew up in a comfortable household but we got one big present - like an electronic game or Barbie dream house and then some smaller ones. But never a room full of gifts, even though as time when it on they could afford it, the point was to learn to be grateful for whatever you got and realise it doesn't grow on trees.

[Blandmum]

Blimey, that sound like what my kids get in an ordinary year!

and I'm not saying that to get sympathy, we are nice and comfortably well off!

Please don't tell my kids, they already want to shop me to childline for being the only kids in the Street without a DVD player in the car!!!

[expatinscotland]

'Please don't tell my kids, they already want to shop me to childline for being the only kids in the Street without a DVD player in the car!!!'

Those poor, deprived souls!

I'd tell threaten them with bus stops with no shelters in Western Scotland in winter .

[littlestrawberry]

It does sound like you have bought them quite alot TBH. My 2 are getting a wii between them which they haven't asked for specifically but we thought they were the right age (6 and 4) and we are fed up with buying them tat they never play with. Anyway because they have asked for lego, we decided to get some aswell but thats it.

Normally we could get away with £50 per child but this year with the wii and lego it will be about £120 and that feels like far too much. It certainly won't be so much next year. So I think your kids have got loads and they need to get used to less presents around. I'm sure they won't be disappointed with that lot.

[seeker]

I would take the Wii and the games back, or sell it on Ebay, then buy them some "proper" presents. Where are the books, the puzzles, the board games, the making things stuff, the chocolate, the paints, the hot wheels cars, the footballs, the.......I could go on, but I won't.

[seeker]

...the whoopee cushions, the trick severed finger, the annuals, the........

[Blandmum]

LOLOLOL . We do the buses in Scotland thing when we visit MIL. That will learn my soft southern jessies, eh??

[expatinscotland]

Tell them what doesn't kill them just makes them tougher, MB. Or that real men can not only stand there and not complain, but do it in a kilt .