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Christmas

Can’t say it to those close to you? Come say it here. Judgement free zone.

564 replies

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 27/12/2021 10:22

I’ve 4 grown kids. They are all here for Christmas. Ds1 is going home today. I can’t wait. (Of all of them hardest to get on with, hates his brother-it’s mutual. He’s a lazy git.) I’ll be able to relax when he’s gone.
I am also looking forward to dh being in work tomorrow so me and Dd can sprawl on sofa watching shite.
I also hate Christmas cooking.

OP posts:
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Thurlow · 27/12/2021 10:34

I'm at my parents for a few days with the kids. Parents don't actually want to do anything but potter around the house. They want me up and dressed and sort of just sitting around with them. I love that they love the kids and are happy to have us here but in over the past few weeks we've just done a massive house move, I just want a few hours on my own reading a book to try and recuperate!

First world and selfish rant over.

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JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 27/12/2021 10:37

My visitors don't go home until tomorrow. I cannot bloody wait. I'm sending DH to take them home, so I can have the house to myself for a few hours.

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Holly60 · 27/12/2021 10:38

Love DH dearly but going to go for a solo walk later to have a break Grin

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Madamswearsalot · 27/12/2021 10:42

Oooh, can I have a moan?

Yes it's been lovely to be with everyone - I agreed the first 5 times you said it and I still agree now but I'm hoping that if I ignore you you'll switch to a different conversation topic.

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Lily019 · 27/12/2021 10:46

My eldest son is a greedy git. I had a fridge groaning with food, meant to last us for a few days. He's made it his mission to empty the fridge as fast as possible so looks like Im doing another shop well before New Year.

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Totalwasteofpaper · 27/12/2021 10:50

My mil invited herself for the full period we were off 23rd -28th and it is my last childfree Christmas.

She won't shut up about my BIL who isnt here because he was too cheap and lazy to come home she is enmeshed with and favours to an outrageous degree. Bil got gifts worth £1k, we got a baby monitor which is a joint Christmas present combined with baby gift a regifted bath set and mens jumper worth £200 max.
It also transpires she gives him about £400 pm - he is a grown adult man with a job.

She brought fuck all down with her and keeps trying to drink my good wine.

Dh is a mix of sad angry and wanting to keep the peace.
I can't relax in my own home.
I hate it. It's shit.

I wish she would fuck off to the far side of fuck. Then fuck off some more.

Now I'll go down and smile at her and ask her she slept while tidying up after her and making her drinks despite me being 7 months pregnant

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Ladyflip · 27/12/2021 10:50

My MIL has been staying with us in very sad circumstances for two weeks and I'm about sympathied out and need to have my period pain day my own way, meaning chocolate and books and Netflix without her being here. It's not going to happen so I'm in hiding which is considered a passive aggressive move on my part.

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Totalwasteofpaper · 27/12/2021 10:51

Thanks that cathartic

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CovidisaThiefofJoyandcandoone · 27/12/2021 11:04

Lol i do the hiding thing too :)
My in-laws are lovely but completely take over my kitchen.... to the extent of telling me what I can and cannot eat.

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psuedocream3 · 27/12/2021 11:05

I fell out with a toxic family member not long before Christmas so decided not to go to their family festivities this year - and secretly it was the best decision I have ever made. I didn't have to put up with pretentious self righteous behaviour and being the subject of passive agressive comments, or have to deal wih that one family member that gets absolutely wasted, has ruined every family event including my wedding day, and becomes vile and abusive to anyone trying to help them whilst trying to keep the children shielded from it. I had a lovely day with my husband and children, completely relaxed and not a worry in the world or a sniff of drama. Truth be told, I wish we had decided this years ago!

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EnjoyingTheSilence · 27/12/2021 11:06

My mum has turned into a child. She does this every time on the day she’s due to go home but it’s really doing my head in this time

I love her to bits and she’s be gutted if she knew so I’m having to really bite my tongue but it’s so damn hard.

And I already posted on the thread about narrating everything. Why? Just why? Is this what I and my children’s have to look forward to?

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Clareyck · 27/12/2021 11:08

We are at mils who I generally get on well with she is really lovely but has a certain laissez faire approach to food safety Turkey has been put on kitchen side for 48 hours for people to help themselves. Kitchen is baking I've said I'll sort me and the kids out for lunch as its been out the fridge for a while...apparently I'm paranoid...thing that annoys me most is there is a fridge with 16 bottles of prosseco that I suggested we half empty ans put meat in and was looked like I was bonkers...I like proseco but prefer not being ill and surely 8 chilled bottles at one time enough for 11 people 4 of them kids?

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hulahoopqueen · 27/12/2021 11:13

Deep breath:

DM - Yes, you ARE passive aggressive. Nobody has ever been more so than you. Yes, next year we will be seeing DH's family because they have a new baby, whose first christmas it will be, and they are relaxed and nice people to be around. I will be avoiding you like the plague, because being at your house is like purgatory.

M - Fuck you, for making DH jump through every imaginable hoop to see his son on christmas day. Frankly I am astounded on a daily basis that a scumbag like you managed to raise such a thoughtful, kind, empathetic little boy. Despite what you tell everyone who crosses your path, I will never treat him any different than I do my own children, no matter how many slurs you throw my way.

THANK YOU @OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow. Fantastic thread and even better username.

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Turkishangora · 27/12/2021 11:18

I don't like Christmas. I get completely overwhelmed, mil here for 3 days mutters and moans constantly, wants entertaining all the time, extremely needy, DH in a foul mood due to her being here, therefore opting out and not engaging leaving me to do all the leg work. DH has to give her lifts as she can't drive and no public transport. The fact that we go through this every year because she's refused to learn to drive sends me into an irrational fury.

Once he'd returned from taking her back yesterday (3 hour round trip) I said never again. Even the 2 DC felt the strain, they wanted their house back.

My new years resolution is to be a bit more selfish! A friend even sent me a picture of a paragraph in a book prompting me! I'm constantly accommodating everyone else's needs and am completely drained.

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PeonyRose80 · 27/12/2021 11:28

My eldest daughter is emotionally manipulative and didn’t want to see me and our side of family (not with her Dad) because we didn’t reply to a ranting msg as was stuck in bed with covid - could barely lift head- I am actually glad ! Can’t say that to anyone in real life

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CharityDingle · 27/12/2021 11:31

I enjoy my own company, so am almost peopled out by now. Looking forward to getting back home at this stage. Tomorrow beckons... Grin

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DifficultBloodyWoman · 27/12/2021 11:42

I love my husband dearly and he is a wonderful man but if we have to do one more thing ‘together’, I’m going to start digging the foundations of a patio.

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venusandChristmars · 27/12/2021 11:43

Adult dc have been away from home for many years. I've got so used to this being MY house, and I find it instrusive when they treat it like thier home again. They wander into my bedroom and bathroom, they go into my office to use the photocopier or look for scissors and selotape, they rumage in the fridge and cupboards...

When dc1 returns to home town they spend most time with friends or at parties; dc2 lives nearby so doesn't usually stay. Both of them here together and they revert to boisterous child behaviour, having secrets and 'ganging up' on me (in a loving, kind, family teasing kind of way).

They leave after lunch today. dh will retreat to his man-cave, I will reclaim the sofa and my choice of music.

I love them dearly but I hadn't realised how set in my ways I had become.

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Mistressofnone · 27/12/2021 11:46

FIL why are you still sulking that we couldn't see you Christmas morning when you only asked 3 days before when our day was already planned out. The whole point of us spending last Tuesday at yours was to do a mini Christmas so you would have Christmas Day to see your grumpy wife's family, before you jet off to the Caribbean on Boxing Day. You didn't even reply to DH's merry Christmas voicemail.

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TellySavalashairbrush · 27/12/2021 11:48

Dh has finally gone back to work and I have the house to myself . Very happy to watch all the programmes he usually talks through on catch up.
I also really really missed adult dd - her first Christmas living in her own place and when she wasn’t working , she was at in-laws. We had a long telephone conversation last night which was lovely but I must admit I felt sad not being with her.

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GrowBabyGrow · 27/12/2021 11:48

@CharityDingle I relate so much to being peopled out!

My rant is that my brother needs to grow up and stop reverting to a grumpy teenager who is perpetually embarrassed by his parents and the suburbs that we all (apart from him) live in and really like. The grumpiness and nitpicking and constant eggshells when he's home (with his wife!!) has got pretty old now, especially now he is almost 30. And my mum needs to stop treating him like a teenager and acknowledge that he is an adult and just reacting like he's 16 makes it worse for everyone.

And my MIL needs to also stop treating my BIL like he is a baby who just doesn't know how to be an adult. He's a homeowner who has been able to get away with everything and never learnt consequences because she treats him like he's her little prince when actually he is a bit of a selfish prick.

PHEW that feels better.

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Gingernaut · 27/12/2021 11:49

I've got four mismatched balls of yarn and a pair of knitting needles for a secret santa present. One has no label. Fuck off you weird skinflint.

I have had two days alone and not had to speak to anyone. It was fabulous.

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Covidfallout2 · 27/12/2021 11:54

Was suppose to be going home for 4 days to parents who are scared of covid. Got worried as was in close contact with positive cases at work. Now 12 people positive. My brother was flying up from London and him and my nephew full of cold.

We did pcrs beforehand and negative and daily lateral flows. Had a family phone all to ask parents if they are ok with risks.

This resulted in my mum becoming abusive. Telling us we are pieces of shit etc. she is heartbroken we ruined Xmas. We we never said that. Just asked if they are comfortable with what’s going on. My bro and I decided not to travel as the abuse was too much.

Now we have 3 families separated. I spent a relaxed day at friends. Now alone as all my friends have covid.

Very annoyed with their reaction and they don’t see what they have done wrong. We would of travelled up if we actually had a proper conversation. The abuse stopped it

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BillyAndTheSillies · 27/12/2021 11:56

DB moans and snaps and contributes nothing. So lazy and eats me out of house and home when he's here. Winds the kids up to a hyperactive mess and then moans that they're too loud. He's getting worse, or I'm getting less patient with it.
He's 28, still at home and I'm sick of never seeing my parents without him being around and being a smug knob who has never had to put his hand in his pocket for anything or lived in the real world.

For once, he's wound me up more than MIL and that's saying something!!!

I'm feeling for my DH. DBil cut off the family including DH at the insistence of DSil. It's his first Christmas NC with his brother - and not through his choice. He went to send him a Christmas message and reach out but he's been blocked. He misses his brother and is really cut up by the whole thing.

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CornishTiger · 27/12/2021 11:58

I’m looking forward to work tomorrow and I will not be wfh!

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