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Is anyone else's Christmas not "ruined"?

(231 Posts)
DumplingsAndStew Wed 18-Nov-20 08:35:08

Constantly reading about how Christmas will be awful due to restrictions on travel and numbers.

A few years ago, we started having Christmas alone at home, just me and the two kids. We take it easy, have a Christmas dinner and stay in pyjamas and just chill out. Its much more manageable for of us (additional needs).
In terms of activities leading up to Christmas, the main thing we do is go out looking at people's light displays, drink hot chocolate, watch movies etc.

But according to most people, our Christmas is awful and unimaginable to them. 🤷🏼‍♀️

OP’s posts: |
Fressia123 Wed 18-Nov-20 08:37:45

Ours. Nothing has changed in the slightest. We have no local family though and I'm sure that helps!

Hazelnutlatteplease Wed 18-Nov-20 08:41:01

DD is hoping. She said last year was perfect. I was ill and everyone in the wider family was doing their own thing so we had a quiet day and easy Christmas dinner just the 3 of us.

She's hoping this year might be the same if we're still in a degree of lockdown just without me being ill.

SnuggyBuggy Wed 18-Nov-20 08:42:18

We were planning a quiet, no travelling, fairly low key Christmas anyway. We are just lucky our Christmas hasn't been ruined and it doesn't stop me having sympathy for those whose it has.

teenagetantrums Wed 18-Nov-20 08:44:05

No last few years just been me and DP. I work every other Christmas day. And if l don't work Christmas day l work boxing day. Family to far away to travel for a day. So always just the two of us.
My son will stay in London as he will be working. My daughter making noises about coming but I'm presuming that will be allowed she in same county as us. But if not she will be happy with her friends who she lives with.
To be honest even when kids were little l preferred a chilled day at home. So in short nothing changed for me

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz Wed 18-Nov-20 08:44:39

Last Christmas day was manic and stressful at my parents. I said that night to dh we are having it just the four of us at home this year. Covid has (unfortunately for the world) taken the worry of how to tell our folks without seeming like bitches.

So we are getting the Christmas we planned and, thankfully, the dc are excited about it too.

DumplingsAndStew Wed 18-Nov-20 08:45:26


I do definitely still empathise with those who will be affected by restrictions.
I just wish that thought went both ways and those who don't have a big thing at Christmas weren't told how terrible their christmas is, if that makes sense?

OP’s posts: |
SnuggyBuggy Wed 18-Nov-20 08:51:01

No I do get what you mean. We never had big Christmases when I was a child and I still found Christmas magical. It's just not to everyones taste.

I remember doing Christmas as just me and DH one year as I only had Christmas and Boxing day off and his parents couldn't be bothered to travel to us for a change. He was genuinely miserable because to him it's not Christmas without a group. I guess it depends on what's normal for you.

AgnesNaismith Wed 18-Nov-20 08:51:36

Nope, we have a small Christmas and dm is in our ‘bubble’ although we’re not seeing her much as dc are at school. By Christmas they will have been off for at least 10 days so ours will be pretty much normal.

I will miss the panto, ballet, light switch on, carol service, school fayre etc etc

Bufferingkisses Wed 18-Nov-20 08:52:07

Every year is a pile on at my house, people arriving and leaving at various times of day whilst I cook all arsing day then rallying those who haven't legged it into the kitchen, far too much wine and exhaustion.

I am really, really looking forward to a quiet and cheap year!

Fleamaker123 Wed 18-Nov-20 08:53:47

I know what you mean, we have Christmas just DH and two kids, so no different for us. I do sense sometimes people feel a bit sorry for us! Like it's boring? We used to all get together at Christmas and it was lovely, but we've lost various family and we've had to recreate it ourselves. You can still have a lovely time.

namechangefail2020 Wed 18-Nov-20 08:55:31

Mine is if the pubs shut but was only my husband and our 2 small kids going for Xmas lunch there. I won't be too traumatised if it's closed tho, it's not that important

lazylinguist Wed 18-Nov-20 08:56:07

Not 'ruined' exactly - that's a bit dramatic. My parents are meant to be coming, if they're allowed by then. We tried for the first time spending Christmas just the 4 of us (me, dh and the dc) a few years ago. Tbh it was a real anti-climax and we all agreed we didn't want to do it again and far preferred Christmas with the extended family. So I'm sure we'll manage to have a pleasant time if it has to be just the 4 of us this year, but it's certainly not what we'd choose.

Hoppinggreen Wed 18-Nov-20 08:56:39

Nope, we usually have my mum come for Breakast then just the 4 of us go out for a curry. If we can’t have my Mum here I will drop a hamper on the doorstep and if we can’t go out for a curry I will cook something. I have an Ocado slot booked on 20th so can order whatever we want for then.
Only things we may not be able to do are our usual Xmas eve visit to Manchester for a bit of Xmas atmosphere and visiting the in laws a few days before for pressie Exchange (which we do under duress)
So all fine here

Newuser991 Wed 18-Nov-20 08:57:48

What is Christmas but exchanging gifts and eating a meal?

I really don't understand people who can't do that only with immediate family for one year in a lifetime

GregoryRowling Wed 18-Nov-20 08:58:35

I like to make the most of things. Usually we have the whole family to ours and love it! This year we’re getting excited about a pj day and lots of movies, playing games etc! When life gives you lemons and all that!

OrangeIsTheNewTwat Wed 18-Nov-20 09:00:00

Really looking forward to this Christmas. Our family are all horrors - I barely see my own family (racist & turn every social event into an attempt to convert me to start attending their church of bigots). PILs are a pain in the arse, narcissistic, have zero boundaries & are hoarders. 2020 has been blessedly peaceful in this respect.

GalaxyCookieCrumble Wed 18-Nov-20 09:01:02

Nothing has changed with our Christmas, the press like to make it as dramatic as possible, but, I guarantee, those muppets in Government will be having the same old Christmas.

stealthninjamummy Wed 18-Nov-20 09:03:01

My Xmas day will be the same as last year me and dc as I’m a single parent. I will miss the build up like pantomimes, visiting Santa, having friends over and we get invited to a party every Xmas eve, but I’m looking for alternatives - light displays at big gardens, cooking together, drive in cinemas, and it might be possible to go ice skating. I wouldn’t say Xmas is ruined because it will be what I make it but I can understand it will be difficult for larger families who perhaps can’t see each other and / or have a reduced income.

AndNoneForGretchenWieners Wed 18-Nov-20 09:03:51

Mine was ruined last year when my DH was no longer with us so this year is more of the same, only as a single adult I have a bubble with my parents and my nan, so everyone who is most important to me will be there on Christmas Day. My DSS will be missed but he will be with his wife and puppy so we can do socially distant visits to the bottom of the front garden. People who are being so dramatic about not being able to stick to the routine are irritating. However I can empathise very strongly with those who worry it will be the last time to visit someone who is elderly or terminally ill. That would be very painful indeed.

PrincessButtockUp Wed 18-Nov-20 09:04:22

In ordinary circumstances, a small Christmas at home with just the three of us could be nice, we have done it before though we do more often gather as a bigger clan. However, my mother in law is at the other end of the country, alone and lonely. We want to go to her for Christmas as we alternate years with each side of the family. I am worried about her and the thought of her spending Christmas alone after having spent most of the year alone upsets me. My Christmas will be fine either way but hers will be ruined if we can't see her.

MsTSwift Wed 18-Nov-20 09:04:38

Love a big jolly Christmas. Agree with lazy Wouldn’t it fall flat just the 4 of you? We were going to be 3 siblings families and our parents

Ideasplease322 Wed 18-Nov-20 09:07:14

Don’t be so precious!

Everyone is entitled to their own version of Christmas.

People are also entitled to express their opinion.

lazylinguist Wed 18-Nov-20 09:07:22

What is Christmas but exchanging gifts and eating a meal?

It's what you make it. For me it usually involves spending several days with family whom I see rarely because they live a long way away. My dc love spending time with their cousins. We play lots of games, go on long walks together, cook and eat together etc. So for us it's a lot more than just exchanging presents and eating one meal.

So yes, we'll cope fine spending Christmas just the 4 of ys this year, but no it's really not going to feel exactly the same but with fewer people.

LittleTiger007 Wed 18-Nov-20 09:07:59

I’m with you, quiet and easy is the best. Movies, walks, hot chocolate, naff indoor fireworks, our Christmas will be peaceful and lovely.

I am worried that we may not be able to see my parents and sad not to have a gathering or two with friends ... but it will be ok. It is what you make it.

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