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Take them to see a panto, and completely baffle them

Crackers, mince pies, Christmas pudding...

Crackers, Christmas pudding, goose, Christmas cake, mince pies.

Turkey dinner
Mince pies (v. Difficult to get in US)
Christmas pudding
Christmas crackers (we never found in US)
Decent cheese board - European type cheese is difficult to find and very expensive in the States

Turkey, crackers, charades.

Queens speech (try YouTube)
Sherry
Board games
Muddy walk followed by mince pies while stood round the boot of someone's car

Give them something alcoholic at 8.30 and then continue drinking solidly throughout the day. Find some random uncles to have a row that turns about pushy half way though dinner.

You must serve sprouts, turnips, parsnips, bread sauce and at least three proteins.

Just our normal xmas really as Americans have a much more casual xmas day.

Xmas pud, mince pies, pigs in blankets, stuffing, trifle, queens speech (see if you can find a recording of last years?!), stockings,

Definitely crackers. Read the jokes, wear the hats.

Full lunch will all the bits. Sprouts. Roast potatoes. Pigs in blanket. I’d even throw in a Yorkshire pudding.

Oh yes, pants are great. Took our Thai SIL to one, she loved it!

That should read Panto obviously. SIL was aware of pants before she came to the UK for Christmas.

Panto is an excellent suggestion from Cinnamoncookie, my DH is Australian, he has never seen anything like Panto before and was totally bemused by it!

Stick on a Bond film and Mary Poppins.

In all seriousness, I like carols from kings on in the morning and then elf or the grinch. I e have Buck's Fizz and Damon and eggs for breakfast. Lunch is at 2pm and after that we go for a walk and look at all the lights in people's houses. Just a twenty minute round the block walk. Supper is sandwiches, always turkey sandwiches and Christmas specials. Morecambe and wise or something equally nostalgic.

We have a game to see who can keep on their cracker hat the longest.

Trifle! If nothing else baffles them that should do it... Bucks fizz and bacon butties for breakfast, and if you have Christmas cake, offer some mature cheddar or a good sharp Wensleydale to go with it.

@Cinnamoncookie

Panto is an amazing idea, thankyou!

@LinoleumBlownapart @CountFosco @Equimum @DelphiniumBlue @KatnissMellark

Thankyou, will add all to my list.

@FridgeCut

Haha! Yes thankyou.

@BrieAndChilli

Thankyou, I hadnt thought of Stockings.

@SavoyCabbage

Yes thankyou, definately crackers and a yorkshire pudding!

@CountFosco

Haha! Yes we will definately go to a Panto.

@nancy75

Yes! Definately, I'm totally bemused by them also.

@VoodooCat

Good idea! Will definately find a good british film to watch.

You need to watch The Snowman at some point.

@FridgeCut

Thankyou, Bucks fizz and elf/grinch are a definate!

@mumonashoestring

Yes Thankyou, need to make a trifle and buy some bucks fizz!

Panto has been a hit with American niece of ours.
Crackers - they don't have them and niece loved ours so much, I'd send some in the years when they didn't come.

Christmas pud, sprig of holly on top, brought to the table flaming nicely, with other lights switched off for effect.
For anyone who's never done it, put hot pud on a plate big enough to contain any overflow, then on a good sized tray. Half brandy and half vodka does it nicely, about a cupful altogether, heated in a small frying pan. If you have gas cooker tilt pan when very hot to catch, pour immediately over pud, call to whoever get lights switched off and proceed ASAP to table.
If you don't have gas cooker, prob. need to light it with a long something or other.

Mistletoe as well, I think it's only found in Europe. Depends if you want to kiss then though . Stockings in the U.S. are far superior to anything in U.K, if anything I would ask them to bring you some over, we bought lovely large knitted style ones for our children in Target when we lived there and as a child I had a beautiful one that my uncle and auntie sent from Canada, it's still going strong.

Church?

Make sure you all have an argument over something petty

Playing monopoly with an argument about the rules and everyone storming off in a huff 😂