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I have spent more on DS(8) than on DD(4). Please reassure me that it doesn't matter!

(16 Posts)
CoffeeChocolateWine Wed 21-Dec-16 11:11:18

I've just been wrapping my DC's presents and I can't shake the feeling that they are imbalanced. They have the same number, which I think is more important to them at this age, but I have spent about £30 more on DS(8) than DD(4) (about £110 compared with £80 excluding stockings which are more balanced), plus I got some of DS's stuff for bargain prices so the value of them is even more still. Am I being ridiculous to be worried about this? Here's what I've bought them...
DS
Kindle Fire (£30 on Black Friday)
Remote controlled car (£40)
Chemistry set (£15)
Star Wars lava lamp (£12.50 reduced from £25)
Tom Gates audio books (£8)
Chocolate selection pack

DD
Kiddizoom camera (bought off friend who received a duplicate present for £25)
My Fairy Garden playset (£10)
Digibirds playset (£15)
Soft Anna doll (£15)
Beatrix Potter audio books (£20)
Chocolate selection pack

I guess it feels like my son is getting two main presents and my daughter is only getting one main present which is making it feel imbalanced. But it doesn't matter does it (please?!) I think they will both love their presents.

PberryT Wed 21-Dec-16 11:12:27

Chill out it will be fine.

ProudBadMum Wed 21-Dec-16 11:13:06

It's fine. Some kids cost more as they like different things. Don't worry about it

JeepersMcoy Wed 21-Dec-16 11:13:34

It doesn't matter. Equal does not mean the same. As long as they are both getting things they want it doesn't matter one jot how much they cost.

OhFuds Wed 21-Dec-16 11:14:02

They won't notice or care at that age, fast forward 10 years then they might grin eyeing up my 13yr old who's moaning already because I won't buy a £60 jumper.

Gardencentregroupie Wed 21-Dec-16 11:14:06

At their age they're hardly likely to be asking for the receipts! They're both getting a good selection of age appropriate gifts. Don't worry about it. Anyway Santa remembers whinging and ungrateful behaviour.

SquedgieBeckenheim Wed 21-Dec-16 11:14:07

My DD is much younger than your children, so I don't have first hand experience of that age group.
However, when I was 4 and 8 I didn't know the monetary value of things. Maybe kids are more savvy that way now? I don't think it matters though.

NightWanderer Wed 21-Dec-16 11:15:09

It'll be fine. I have four kids so balancing things is a nightmare. I tend to go on size and number rather than cost.

SpotTheDuck Wed 21-Dec-16 11:15:30

Don't think it matters, your DD won't notice or care what the monetary value is. At that age they only notice if the pile of gifts looks very different.

BadToTheBone Wed 21-Dec-16 11:16:36

I do 'try' to make them equal but it doesn't always work out. I figure their needs / wants are different and it all balances out in the end. My DC know they get things at different times and they barely even notice what the other has. The only time it matters is when it comes to dishing out sweets, they notice down to one smartie!!!!

twinmamma2b Wed 21-Dec-16 11:17:48

My mum and I were talking about this recently. She said this often happened when DB and I were children. One year she would spend more on him, other years on me. She always made sure we had the same number of gifts to open, which you have also done. We were blissfully unaware of the relative value of them. smile

Artandco Wed 21-Dec-16 11:17:54

It's fine. They won't know the value of items and both have a few gifts each suitable for their different ages.

I have never matched costs. Approximate sure, as in £20 on one and £200 on another is often unbalanced. But you might get a good offer on one item or one really wants something that's actually much cheaper

I remember as teenagers for example I received a laptop (£600 ish approx) and younger siblings a bike (£100). The bikes obviously look a bigger gift but aren't money wise. This will likely happen as yours grow with a 4 year gap as one may be mobile phone or laptop age say 12 years when the other 8 is still in toy mode

CoffeeChocolateWine Wed 21-Dec-16 11:26:36

Thank you. I was hoping you'd all say that smile I know my DD will be happy with her things...I just find 4 quite a tricky age to buy for as she's outgrown some of the younger range things but not ready for some of the older kid things. I found that with my son too. Over the years it will all balance out though!

harderandharder2breathe Wed 21-Dec-16 11:52:50

At 4 especially she'll have no concept of how much anything costs. You've said they have the same number which is what they will care more about, although if the 4 year old had more but same or less value, I'd expect the 8 year old to be starting to understand about value

Equimum Wed 21-Dec-16 19:34:35

I don't think they'all even know. We've spent quite a bit less on DS2 (1) than DS1 (coming 4), simply because DS2 doesn't really need much, and toddler toys are cheaper than bigger kids toys. I have roughly equalled out the number, but now DS2 pile is actually bigger because his toys are chunkier. I don't think you'll ever get them absolutely equal, and whatever measure we use to try to achieve it, is probably not the measure the kids will use once they are big enough anyway.

GoofyTheHero Wed 21-Dec-16 19:37:05

It's fine! I haven't even tried to balance my 2 (and have no real idea what I've spent blush). I've just bought them both a few things I think they'll like. They're too young to know or care what it all cost.

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