In tears ( how can I manage it all)(75 Posts)
I am so stressed and sad , I have no way to pay for the kids presents until wed and Fri this week! Its all going out of stock and I am so terrified that I won't be able to get them. What they want. I so want it to magical and feel so pressured. I spent £150 just yesterday on what was meant to be a Christmas shop and whenever anyone eats anything I am terrified that I'm gonna have to choose between toys and food. No one else cares about them and they are so amazing, they deal with everything so well and really deserve a good Christmas. They have no other family and their dad has just cancelled seeing them on boxing day. Its not what I wanted for them.
Someone help me please.
I used to find the things in argos and then just keep reserving them every couple of days until I got paid.
What do you want help with? You've bought the food shop and you've got the money to buy their presents coming later in the week. It all sounds fine.
I'm already looking at empty cupboards and its looking like I will need another same size shop by the Friday as kids as off school. I'm stressing mostly that I'm having to wait so close to the day to try and get all their gifts. I'm so in edge its making me tearful.
I can't reserve anything as the website keeps stating due to demand its cannot take any orders / reservations online.
The kids will love having an amazing Christmas with their mum
Your kids will have a good Christmas even if, worst case scenario, their number one toy sells out before you get paid. They have a mum who is brimming with love for them, they will all be together and I am confident you will make sure they have plenty to eat.
Make a list for Wednesday, stick to it, and try to remember that a happy day is not about the presents.
It's so hard doing everything on your own but your kids will benefit more from a happy mum who couldn't get them everything than a stressed out miserable mum who put Christmas on a credit card or similar.
I also get paid Wednesday so that's when I'm getting everything! I'm trying to see it as festive and fun ;-)
The times I had to do everything on Christmas eve because that was when I got cash!
What are the main toys they want?
Let's break this down OP
what's your Christmas shop? Or what do you want them not to eat for Christmas? Is that just your roast and pudding? Or are you counting nuts/crisps/cheese board? £150 sounds like you did a normal shop plus Christmas bits, so it sounds ok to me. Can you do a meal plan including soup or sandwiches for lunch so you don't worry.
Is your next pay just for presents? Have you worked out budgets? I'm sure you'll get something lovely for your DCs. There will be lovely things left in shops, I don't mean this to sound cheeky but honestly, think of all the Boxing Day sales! There's stuff left after the 25th so I do think you'll be ok.
How old are they?
What have they asked for?
Do they have their hearts set on anything? If so, is there anyone you could get a short term, interest free loan from (NOT payday loan sharks but a real person) so you can get them at least one thing each that they're really hoping for.
When you've done that, relax. Go to the Poundstore, Tiger, Wilkos and supermarkets for sweets and small toys.
Think of food thats cheap and filling -soupd, sheperds pies, jacket pots, homemade pizza etc and snacks so you know if you need another shop itll be cheaper. Homemade pizza and cales are cheap and entertain the kids free of chrage so a double whammy. You know what you want but list a few reserve itwms so when u get your money you dont panic. Youll be fine and as everyone says the kids have a mum who loves them so it will be special youll all be together so movie days and nice walks all together. X
Could you have a look for any toys on Very? You can buy now and pay later on a lot of stuff (interest free for the first few months). That way you could at least buy a couple of toys now and take the pressure off a little bit.
I'd also highly recommend Aldi/Lidl for your food shop if that's not already where you'll be going.
Relax. Your situation isn't really too bad, it's natural to panic the week before Christmas!
You can make it really special without tons of materialistic stuff. You gave each other and can have lots of fun.
Try Argos. They always let you reserve stuff.
How can you possibly be looking at empty cupboards if you spent £150 on food yesterday? You're catastrophising. Sit down and make a cuppa and a plan.
first, tell them that some stuff is being kept for christmas and they need not to eat it until then. I hardly think you are starving them.
second, roof, heat, bills and food are priorities over toys. If money is tight, that is how it is. Explain, take them to see some christmas lights (usually free), plan some things you all enjoy doing.
very little actually goes out of stock, and if they have to wait until after the 25th it really doesn't matter.
do NOT go into debt for dec 25th. rule no 1.
turn off the tv ads, stop reading the magazines, ignore the posters. It is all shit and you are better than that.
Keep calm. You have time to make this a very special Christmas. For my DC, now 14 and 9 the really important hits about Christmas are all being at home together, making paper decorations (Poundland or the Works) for the house, a family jigsaw (£8 from Amazon or try the Charity Shop) to do starting on Xmas Eve, a board game (ditto) to play on Xmas Day and a roast dinner (Lidl turkey is just a nice as Waitrose) on the day.
Presents are lovely but it's the family things we do together they would miss. We're had fat and lean Xmases over the years but these things have remained constant and I don't think the kids know which years were which really.
I had this problem last year and went into local shops and asked them to reserve items for me. They all did so willingly.
Try to reserve toys as others have said. Do you have a Foodbank nearby? They often give out extra treats at this time of year especially biscuits/ chocolates etc for the children.
We aren't having a massive Christmas meal, its all those snacky bits. I know its not about the presents but no one wants their children to have an empty stocking on Christmas morning. The girls want shopkins stuff which of course is mega popular and selling out fast, DS wants thunderbirds stuff and a bb8 thing. I would usually do that Argos thing too. But some of it is Smyth's branded my generation stuff. I have no one to leave them with to go get it either, so right now I'm trying to think up a way to go to Smyth's with out them cottoning on mummy is Santa. Let alone what they have got!
If you are not able to get the stuff you want, buy them a few small presents (box of sweets, "stocking filler" type toys etc) and a card saying that they have a surprise coming up...
Smyths are often open very late into the night in the run up to Christmas, and you can click and collect so have a look at their website for info. DH had to make an emergency run one year when we were all flu-stricken so if you have someone who can sit with them for an hour or two late at night you might be able to make it there! Or get stuff delivered? If you are short of money and are worried, could you give them 'toy tokens' that you've made which promise them the toy that they want/money to spend after Christmas?
Thank you, I know I am over thinking it. I don't do credit so don't worry. I got into huge debt when I was married and since I got clear I do everything cash or debit card only. I've done that panic catalogue buying thing previously never a good idea.
The food shop was normal week plus a few bits, normal weekly shop is £100 and I top up during the week which is why I am also worried as I know all that's meant for presents.
Maybe I need a stiff drink. So sad though this is the first year I have thought oh come on let's get it over with,I normally love it all
Kids really don't need to get exactly what they ask for or want in order to have a good Christmas. If you can't get hold of the things they wished for then just choose something else you know they'll like x
Cotswold, it wouldn't make a difference I still have to take them. I have no one to leave them with.
Sometimes if you order on eBay you can pay using PayPal and you don't have to pay until 2 weeks later.
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