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Christmas or birthday present?

(27 Posts)
nickelbabe Thu 10-Dec-15 21:57:23

Dd will be 4 on Saturday.
In the past, we haven't even thought about presents really for either her birthday or christmas, mainly because we haven't had time nor been organised enough, with a little bit of "everyone else buys her loads"

But one of my friends suggested buying presents when you see them reduced, so that you don't have to worry about presents when you nees to buy them.

I might have ended up buying 4 or 5 "big" presents. (I bought a peppa pig fairground ride for 20 quid in august, a cuddly twilight sparkle half price in sept, a happyland dinoaaur set half price last month)
But she really wants "a phone" and I found a really cheap tablet.
Now we're struggling with having these presents and not knowing when to give them to her!
She's only 4 ffs, and these are massive presents!

She's also being really whiney about both her birthday and christmas - suddenly learning that presents are involved....
My mum and dad are visiting for the weekend, and ahe knows her birthday is when they get here.

I don't want her to feel entitled to any of this.

Lots of blathering just to ask - wwyd - tablet for birthday or christmas?

(In the interest of not dripfeeding - she keeps borrowing our phones to watch youtube and play stupid kids' games and it'll be lovely to have sole ownership of our own devices again)

spad Thu 10-Dec-15 22:05:51


I would let her use it but I wouldn't give it to her. It would be a family phone. She could use it but I wouldn't let her at all think it was hers.

What will you buy her when she is ten if you buy that now?
What will you

nocutsnobuttsnococonuts Thu 10-Dec-15 22:17:08

Tbh im not a fan of phones/tablets for children so no personal experience.

But in your position I would give the most 'wow' gift from santa. Then whichever has the tablet I would make sure I gave a toy aswell to balance it out.

nickelbabe Thu 10-Dec-15 22:36:40

Having it as a family device is a good idea.
We were coming at it from the point of view of making her look after it.

It's not a phone, just a tablet. It's to stop her using our phones.

nickelbabe Thu 10-Dec-15 22:38:24

It just seems like such a big item just to have as an everyday thing that's all.

Christ8l Thu 10-Dec-15 22:47:30

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Christ8l Thu 10-Dec-15 22:48:14

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nickelbabe Thu 10-Dec-15 23:05:26

Christ8l I'm not after inspiration though

I've got the present and am just asking which occasion confusedhmm

attheendoftheday Thu 10-Dec-15 23:15:49

It depends what your plans for Christmas are. She needs to have a bit of time to play of her tablet when she gets it, so if you have to travel or need time to cook at Christmas I'd give her it then, but if you want her to interact with visiting extended family I'd give it on her birthday.

My 4 and 2 to both have tablets btw, and I don't regret getting them. They use them in moderation, and are fantastic for long journeys.

attheendoftheday Thu 10-Dec-15 23:17:28

Also, if you're going to preload the tablet can I recommend the Toca Boca apps? They are really good.

nickelbabe Sat 12-Dec-15 00:02:34

Thank you.
Yes, it's useful to have something when she's going to be otherwise bored. But when she's with family she needs to interact with them.
Thank you for the app hint, I'll check that out

nickelbabe Sat 12-Dec-15 00:03:42

And yes, I think we've got some travelling to do shock

FrozenPonds Sat 12-Dec-15 00:10:19

I would give the Happland and Peppa Pig stuff as soon as possible, she will grow out of those very soon.

The tablet could definitely be a gift to the whole family for Christmas, and you could hang on to Twilight Sparkle.

My seven year old still loves My Little Pony.

OSETmum Sat 12-Dec-15 07:56:00

I'd give 3 of the toys for her birthday and the tablet plus 2 toys for Christmas, then it's even. Unless you are travelling a lot before Christmas, in which case the tablet will come in handy, so I'd do it the other way round.

Ps don't worry about letting her have the tablet, she won't sontaneously combust or turn into a reclusive super-hacker!

laundryeverywhere Sat 12-Dec-15 08:19:57

I agree with the family tablet idea. Keeping the screen time under control will be much easier that way
As my own birthday is close to Christmas I do think it's important to make her birthday just as special as you would if it were at another time of year, not just let it be swallowed up in Christmas. My family have always been very nice about that and I remember when I was little being sad my birthday was over, but knowing I still had Christmas day to look forward to. If you always like to keep things low key and not give too much that's fine, but don't do less than you would normally do just because it's so close to Christmas.

pretend Sat 12-Dec-15 08:23:30

I am in the same boat - DS has a a birthday shortly after Christmas. I have just bought whenever I've seen something since about August. There is now a mountain of stuff in the wardrobe blush

I will divide it up roughly in half and as we are going to family on Christmas Day the Christmas half will be the easier to transport stuff. Also I'll probably wrap slightly more for birthday as he'll also have things from other people at Christmas.

nickelbabe Sat 12-Dec-15 11:39:38

So, I think I'm swayed with the family tablet idea.
Do you think it should be a christmas present from santa to all of us (there's only dd, me and dh) or just turn up with it as an item not a present?

nickelbabe Sat 12-Dec-15 11:42:04

Her birthday's today grin
She's been given a pair of pants from me and a present from a friend (cd of kids' music so that's keeping her entertained!)
She won't get anything else until dh comes home. My mum and dad are coming this afternoon too, and I've been trying this week to persuade her it's her birthday when "gamarr gandad" get here.

laundryeverywhere Sat 12-Dec-15 12:04:57

It might be nice to have it as a present from Santa to all of you, then she can unwrap it, but make sure it is separated from her stocking or whatever and clearly labelled for everyone. Then when you set it up put a few apps for you and Dh on it so it seems to be a shared thing, not just hers.

laundryeverywhere Sat 12-Dec-15 12:06:15

Happy Birthday littlenickelbabe cakefsmilefsmilecake

MrsAmaretto Sat 12-Dec-15 15:49:02

I would keep the tablet until new year, so she understands its value and looks after it. But I think a tablet is too expensive/ age inappropriate gift for a 4year old. My neice at the age of 10 "expects an iPhone 6 as her first phone as she's always got whatever technology she wants from Santa/ parents previously.

Our iPad is the family tablet (& in one of those survivor cases) & boy does my 5 year old know it's not his own one, cost a lot of money, and we couldn't replace it if it got broken.

We could easily afford to replace it but it's really important for us that the kids learn to look after what they have & don't expect us or Santa to buy them whatever they want.

Personally I'd begin now telling your phones/ tablets are very expensive but you've been saving really hard to buy a family one and hopefully after Christmas you'll have saved enough. And once you unveil it make sure you use it every so often so she knows it's not just hers!

pretend Sat 12-Dec-15 17:21:30

If a kid is going to have a phone or a tablet, I can't understand the logic behind getting them a shitty cheap one unless you know they are likely to break it.

DS is good with his stuff and he's had an iPad for as long as he can remember. I can't understand getting a crap phone just because it's somehow immoral to get your kids a good one, presuming you can afford it.

Nonidentifyingnc Sat 12-Dec-15 19:01:25

It depends what they are going to use it for really, pretend. I bought my 7 yr old a galaxy tab. Not anywhere near as expensive as an ipad but just as good for watching netflix or playing games on.

hippoherostandinghere Sat 12-Dec-15 20:27:45

Seriously?? Why all this angst over present giving. She's 4 not 1, of course she knows whata going on. I have a 4 year old and if she woke up on her birthday to a pair of pants from us she'd be bloody upset. Give her 2 or 3 of the toys for her birthday and then the tablet and the rest for Christmas. She deserves to be treated on these 2 occasions, she won't turn into a spoilt brat because she got a few birthday gifts.

nickelbabe Mon 14-Dec-15 21:20:55

Don't worry, I'm not angsting grin

Just wanted to gauge opinion on it.
I don't want to be one of "those" parents.

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