Can I tell relatives to buy less presents next year?

[GetMe]

Or is that really rude?

We only have a small family but are shocked by how many presents our generous family have bought for our children this year. Our youngest is only 8 months old and he got 20 presents and he really doesn't need much at all, he has his older siblings' toys.

DH and I are really trying to 'tone down' Christmas and make it about our faith, family and spending time together and not get too stressed. We don't want our DCs to grow up expecting 50 odd presents each so we have kept our spending down this year but our relatives have literally gone crazy buying 4/5/6 presents each for our children.

I think part of the reason is because we told them this year not to buy for us but just for the kids but this has made them go crazy buying for the kids which wasn't our intention!

It's so generous of them but can I tell them nearer the time next year to buy less or is that the height of rudeness?

[stiffstink]

Tell them sooner rather than later, I start shopping early!

Can any of the gifts be regifted?

[chocolatereindeer]

I feel the same except that we're not religious. I really don't like the commercialism of it all though, I want it to be about family, love and all that malarkey!

I find it really hard to ask people not to spend so much on the DC, especially when the majority of it is either tat or sugar, both of which I don't like them having (I'm not super uptight about sweets etc but they have about a ton of haribo and celebrations). Even when I do ask my relatives my requests go ignored so I'm going to nicely mention in October-ish that they haven't played with most of the junk gifts so please save your money.

It's really annoying, because I love the people that but them this stuff, and I know they have good intentions, but honestly it's ridiculous!

[chocolatereindeer]

Oh it's late and that makes no sense but it's posted so it's staying

[TyneTeas]

My parents did (in comparison to everyone else - including us) excessive presents the first couple of years.

I asked them to limit it to two for Christmas and Birthday, but 'just 'cos' presents whenever, which I thought was a reasonable compromise...

It made no difference for any year for six more years : (

(But we got there!)

[Donthackmenow]

We asked our family to tone it down this year. We asked that they only but each child one present and if they wanted to spend more then would they mind contributing to their savings. Everyone took it surprisingly well (it helps that every time they come and visit they comment on how many toys there are!) and the children enjoyed opening the presents they had (it was probably still about 15 presents though) and playing with them. We will be continuing this 'tradition'

[annabanana19]

yes you can, but they may not listen, IME!

I have a cousin who last year gave my 3 each a £5 Next voucher, box of chocs for me & a bottle of wine. I have never given him anything (nor his children) and I'm not gonna start now neither. I'm not one for handling out gift to cousins kids etc and I've already cut right down t my own kids, nephews & nieces which frankly is enough.

I thanks him and said along the lines of "ever so kind but really no need, you have your own family to buy for as well as nephews/nieces". But this year came a parcel, wine, chocs & £5 each for the kids again. I thanked him & reminded him "please no gifts, spend on your own".

I will certainly not be starting on his family. Simple reason I cannot afford to & I have lots of cousins with kids & don't buy for them so I draw the line.

So try to be brutal in a nice way!