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Unreciprocated gifts - pls tell me I'm no alone!

(5 Posts)
saltedcaramelicious Wed 24-Dec-14 09:37:56

Oh god I feel awful. My boyfriend has two grown up kids. I've only met them a handful of times.
Boyfriend had Xmas gathering with his kids yesterday and I was unable to make it.
When he came over last night he brought cards and a gift from his dc. I hadn't got them anything, and I feel AWFUL now. I've text them to say thanks, you shouldn't have. And I've made a mental note to make it up to them when it's their birthdays in early 2015.
But oh god I feel bad. The present feels like a little box of chocs or something but it's the thought that counts and I'm feeling so guilty. Too late to do anything now and even if I did it'd look like I was only doing it in response to the gift.
sad I am a terrible human being!

MsAspreyDiamonds Wed 24-Dec-14 09:55:01

Don't worry about it, it shows that they have thought about you. I always by a dear friend a gift every Christmas & she doesn't reciprocate but it doesn't bother me in the slightest. She does other things for me like take me put for lubch & has helped me enormously over the years so it is my way of saying thanks. I dont celebrate Christmas but have friends & family who do but I love buying gifts.

This is a new relationship so plenty of time to reciprocate if you want to. The pleasure is in the giving for the sake of it rather than because you
have to. Enjoy tomorrow.

Davros Wed 24-Dec-14 11:50:20

Isn't it kind-of assumed that you are included in the gifts from him to his DCs? Just tell yourself that and don't let it get you down. Do something special for their birthdays as you said. flowers you are nice to care so much about it

saltedcaramelicious Wed 24-Dec-14 19:33:02

Thanks you've both made me feel better!!

inchoccyheaven Wed 24-Dec-14 22:33:04

I am finding this first christmas with new partner a bit of a minefield too. I got a card with money in from gf grandparents and I hadn't thought to give them a card and I got a present from her sis as well again not expected. We have written each others names on presents to all family but I feel I should have got them something on my own?? I think its the not living together thing that makes it feel more difficult to me and is all new as lived with ex after 6 months so were always together from 1st christmas.

On the other hand have been really touched that they did and that they have come around to our very complicated situation.

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