What to do re NC relative's gifts(3 Posts)
Name changed because I think my aunt has mumsnet.
I'm "NC" with my aunt and uncle, because they keep falsely accusing me of things. We tried to move past things for my Nan's sake in 2012, because I had my first child and my Nan wanted everyone to get along for his sake. My aunt and uncle agreed, and promised to help me, but nothing materialised. We met up very occasionally. At Christmas and birthday, they gave large showy gifts. I felt uncomfortable receiving them, but I accepted my son's and donated my own.
I had my second child in February of this year, and they all promised to try harder to interact better, but they still haven't met him. We have arranged to meet on New Year's Eve, but I doubt that it will happen. Today, in the post, I received two £50 Smyths vouchers, one for each child. I feel uncomfortable accepting them. Both kids already have every toy they want bought for Christmas, as we have a small house. I don't know what to do! Do I donate the gift cards? Do I get my aunt and uncle something for Christmas? What does everybody think? Thank you.
I would buy toys/donate card to tje Kids Company and not mention it to your aunt. Or you could wait and buy summer outdoor toys for your dc.
I think if you don't buy anything for her it may cause problems, it is tricky. If you want to stay nc then return all gifts politely or buy something like a heavily discounted food hamper. It is showy without you spending lots of money iyswim.
Then for next Christmas decide whether you want to terminate the relationship & forgo gifts completely.
The gift cards are for your children so yes you could gratfeully accept them and keep them for the summer time to buy something when they need it. You could then send a small hamper, and thank you card. M and s do flower type ones or there is a nice poinsetta plant one on there that you could have delivered to them.
Why don't they meet up more? Is it just a case of time moving too quick and not getting round to it - lets face it that happens to all of us. Do they have good intentions these days but are just bad at actually doing anything or are they simply horrid people who like to flash a bit of cash? Only you know this really. If they're that bad return the gift cards to them so you don't get put in this position again, but there will be no going back after that.
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