Any survival tips for first Xmas with baby?(23 Posts)
My PFB was born six weeks ago.
I am v v v much looking forward to the saccharine parts of babys first Christmas as in dressing her up in a ridiculous outfit, doing a stocking that she won't inderstand, singing incessant tuneless carols at her etc.
However I am dreading the following:
Too much prodding and being passed around relatives leading to overtired meltdown
Total lack of routine leading to multiple overtired meltdowns relatives drunken behaviour meaning I'm on edge about her safety (did I mention she's my PFB??)
Any survival tips? How can I escape relatively unscathed??
do you have a decent, preferably wrap*, sling? stick her in that, she will be comforted by your presence, is safe and can't be passed round/poked unless you want her to be, and can sleep. This is going to be my strategy for much of the day with dc2 who'll be almost 8mo.
*wrap simply because they are even harder for annoying relatives to poke babies in, and you can tuck them in so well
*poke babies through
tucking them in refers to baby not the relatives.
Avoid staying out late. Practice saying 'it's ok, I'll take her now'. Leave the room and be alone with her if that's what you want/she needs. Agree with your partner before hand that you will leave when you are ready and that they must make their own way home if they're not ready to come home. Don't try and do too much. Do take a million pictures!
Oh, and keep your routine! My DD was 5 months on her first christmas. I kept to her routine despite bring out all day. Yes the ils rolled their eyes and huffed when i told them it was DD's nap time, took her out of the room and settled her. But, my kid., my rules and dd was happier for it.
Personally I'd accept any routine you have will go out the window for a day or two and readily accept option of passing baby around so you can relax a bit. When LO is tired, take it as an opportunity to escape off for a walk together.
My DD was about 10 weeks old for her first Christmas and to be honest all I remember was being very grateful she slept through lunch...everything else an exhausted blur!
If I forget the routine and let her be passed around she will be a little purple ball of misery come bed time. This has already happened twice.
She loves the cuddles at the time but gets all agitated and desperate afterwards.
And who has to deal with the aftermath?? MOI.
I don't know about a stretchy wrap thing. It could be an option I suppose. Have never worn her in anything yet though!
Remember she will be a very different person by then as she will be twice as old as she is now. What are your plans for Xmas? Our DD was 7wks old on Xmas Day & we just spent bit as the three of us which was bliss. If you're going to see family, it will obviously be harder but hopefully your family will understand & let you dictate things to an extent.
We have my parents and aunt staying with us for 4 days and we're all going to the in laws for Xmas day (will be 15 people total then)
My DS was 18 days old on his first Christmas.
My PFB will be 15 this Christmas.
How DH and I look back and chuckle at our retina searing tiredness, passing the baby between us. How can two adults be run so ragged by a tiny baby (we were )
We didn't open presents till Boxing Day.
Nicest bit was wrapping up warm and going for a late Boxing Day walk - he would sleep in his pram, moving.
Good Luck and take lots of photos
My DD was four months last christmas. I caught my mother giving her a cadburys chocolate finger to suck.
People will excuse you being PFB. Just leave the room whenever you can with murmurings of feeding and nappy changing.
And use your own tiredness as a reason for ducking out of activities.
Happy first christmas!
She'll be much more able to cope with being passed around by then.
When it's sleep time just pick her up and say "ok it's sleep time, see you later" to the fam. I can't see why the routine needs to be abandoned?
What happens at your family Christmas that is do incompatible with feeding/resting a baby as per normal?
Also remember that people probably don't actually want to hold your baby that much or for that long.
You'll be fine!
I faked being a bit shy feeding ds, so he and I could escape together when he 'needed' a feed
or i needed a cuddle and some quiet time you could also be really honest and say, ''she is tiny and just wants to be near her mummy & daddy although will really enjoy seeing everyone, I'm sure you'll understand that we'd rather not pass her round, there will be plenty of time for cuddles when you next visit individually ''
candykane25 I just snorted my tea reading that remark about the chocolate finger. My DM was guilty of similar tricks
Ds is now 4 but was 4mths old for first Xmas we spent it at home and have done every Xmas since but visit between Xmas n New yr our family are 200miles away though.
Number 2 is due end of this month and again we will not see family at Xmas as we are the ones who always travel to them, some family will visit in Dec.
Don't be worried about saying "no" and take yourself off somewhere to feed to get some peace.
Make sure you have about 4 changes of clothes for you and DD!
Last Christmas my DS had a out of the blue pukefest on Christmas morning and after running out of clean babygrows he ended up in a elf costume (which was a gift I hated). I ran out of clothes after the 3rd change and ended up raiding the wardrobe and wailing that nothing fit while DH held DS and made soothing noises to us both. I'm coming over all faint just remembering it
Oh lordie I hope we don't have a puke fest!!
My mum and mil will be having a Who loves the baby most competition. So I might barely get to hold her at all.
Even when I'm (breast)feeding her, mil insists on stroking her head or face. Sometimes she strokes boob by accident. Tis all a bit much really
Oh god, that would just be too much! Stroking your baby while you feed her? I'd be liable to punch them square in the face. (The MIL not the baby!)
I remember having to go to a Xmas gathering with lots of family when DD was about 12 weeks old. She ended up smelling of everyone's perfume which was most upsetting while feeding her!
Definitely make excuses to take baby somewhere quiet and away from the prodders for a breathe and refresh.
She'll be about the age where everything is more interesting that feeding and she'll be breaking off to stare round her, so you could say with complete truth that you need to go to a quiet room to feed her. Could you get your DH to step in to fend your MIL off if she tries to follow?
The idea of my MIL stroking my boob is just horrifying, you have my admiration for not shrieking at her to back off!
Ohh the boob stroking mil has really made me chuckle. Bless you - that sounds like something straight off a film or comedy tv programme xx
I think you need to be stronger, especially with your mum and mil. Just say 'mil, let her have her milk and you can hold her later on.' My FIL always used to interrupt whilst dd was eating her dinner until one time I said 'grandad, go away and let her eat please!' He didn't like it, but playing peekaboo whilst dd is eating is distracting and annoying!
Enjoy it, it is supposed to be fun!
I have had newborns at Christmas twice and family newborns around too, including very new as in only days old when Santa came - I am the chief cook and bottle washer so baby just came along with me for the ride. Meant I stayed on home turf so called the shots and all is/was good. Can easily leave the room on short notice to see to the dinner or replenish drinks etc so easy to hav your own space, and pleasurable in its own way.
Make sure you take a picture of the baby next to the turkey. My turkeys have always been bigger than the baby on their first christmas!
Aww op I've been where you are (my FIL kissed the baby's head whilst I was bfing her!!) but I'm 3 dc down the line now and honestly, I really agree with a pp, it's supposed to be fun. Just don't stress, relax. It will honestly be fine.
When you think she needs a nap just say, oh I think she needs a nap now. And off you go upstairs to settle her. But it doesn't really matter if she gets a bit grumpy afterwards, just feed her and she'll settle down eventually. It's just a few days.
Pick your battles. But make sure you do which one will cause you the least stress / make you happy.
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