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Christmas present - too expensive?

(104 Posts)
Netguru Sun 04-Nov-12 10:40:27

I'm married for a second time. My first (replacement) wedding ring had a large diamond in it - I adored the ring but unfortunately, after 20 years, not the husband!

My husband now is an absolute sweetie. My wedding ring has a large sapphire in it which he joked when we bought it that he would replace with a diamond if/when he could. No chance - I adore it as it is.

He's coming into a large sum (just under 100k) in a week or so and wants to spend a little more in Christmas than normal. He's offered to spend up to 4k on a ring for me - and I've found one I like. He's going to buy the kids a couple of nicer than normal bits and himself a new desktop mac. Then save the rest/pay off some of the mortgage.

We are not short of money by any stretch of the imagination but I can't help but think 4k on a ring is a little extravagant. I have looked to find one I like for less but can't - and would feel one which was 'ok' would be a bigger waste of money.

He genuinely wants me to be happy. Can't help but think I should be happy with less. To be honest, if I didn't get a ring I genuinely wouldn't mind. But he's right, we can afford it.

Can't help but wonder what I should do. He wants to share a percentage of his good fortune which is lovely.

I know it's a nice dilemma to be in and we are very fortunate. My BF said I should find something nice that I wouldn't buy myself like a pair of jimmy choos for example, which would be equally frivolous but less expensive. Can't find any inspiration on that but still looking.

Netguru Sun 04-Nov-12 14:32:58

Oh and to those who suggest investing it or giving it to charity, this is my husband's money to do with what he likes. I can refuse a gift or make a request but I do not wish to try to dictate how he spends it.

brighthair Sun 04-Nov-12 14:37:10

It's beautiful envyenvy

Beamur Sun 04-Nov-12 15:15:04

You love it, he wants you to have it.
I'd rather have something to keep than an expensive holiday.
Don't feel guilty, enjoy it.

Millie1 Sun 04-Nov-12 15:19:17

It's lovely Netguru - go for it. Forget about feeling guilty - and it's going to bring your DH a great deal of pleasure to treat you! Buy it, insure it, wear it, admire it and enjoy it!! grin

legalalien Sun 04-Nov-12 16:01:23

If it looks like anything, it's a raindance ring from boodles, not something from Dorothy Perkins - and that's a classic that won't date. Only two things - I'd agree with whoever suggested platinum, and you might want to consider a mix of diamonds and another stone like some of the boodles ones - more suitable for everyday wear. Will see if I can find a link.

legalalien Sun 04-Nov-12 16:05:39


Classic enough to be in the v and a.

sparkle12mar08 Sun 04-Nov-12 16:17:20

If you've got that amount of money to play with, then get one specially designed for you - go to Hatton Garden or the jewellery Quarter in Birmingham. Both the Boodles and the Gallacher rings are massively overpriced for the carat weight and quality of the diamonds included - massively. You can get two or three times the stones if you buy direct and get a jeweller to design & make it for you.

Netguru Sun 04-Nov-12 16:22:22

Indeed. I first saw the boodles ring and it was that which made me search for a similar ring without the boodles price tag.

Boodles want 8.4k for the same ring. Not sure what Dorothy Perkins want ;)

alphabite Sun 04-Nov-12 16:23:29

Sorry but I have to agree that it looks like a Dorothy Perkins £6 ring.

poocatcherchampion Sun 04-Nov-12 16:25:53

It sounds loads to me; buy then I realised my engagement and wedding ring are worth this combined and I have no problem wearing them everyday. And I love them!

BlingBubbles Sun 04-Nov-12 16:35:56

I think the ring is gorgeous and if your husband wants to spend the money on you and you have the money well then buy it! I certainly would grin

Mrsjay Sun 04-Nov-12 17:01:12

Not sure what Dorothy Perkins want ;)

7.99 grin

charleybarley Sun 04-Nov-12 17:09:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gregssausageroll Sun 04-Nov-12 17:31:22

If you want it buy it. My engagement ring is £4k. Made for me abroad. Just make sure it is fully insured and enjy wearing it n

Badgersnatch Sun 04-Nov-12 19:02:17

DH's wedding ring was 3k, his reasoning was that he will wear it every day until he dies. Doesn't seem much when you look at it that way.

Badvoc Sun 04-Nov-12 19:21:10

Now you see part of me is aghast that someone would spend that much money on a ring!
You can afford it.
Your husband wants to give you a meaningful gift.
It's not really anyone else's business what you do with your money.
If it will make you both happy do it.
(Looks fondly at £20 wedding band from Argos) smile

Loveweekends10 Mon 05-Nov-12 06:04:11

I just could not do that. It would never be a dilemma I would be faced with because 4k or 10k it would be back in his hand. Sorry but it's too footballers wives for me.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief Mon 05-Nov-12 06:21:11

If it makes you feel better, if you choose wisely it's just a transfer of wealth because precious metals and diamonds are a non depreciating asset. Therefore, he isnt really "spending" #4k- just transferring it from one asset class to another.

It's probably a better way to carry wealth than cash because when they print their way out of the financial crisis, cash will be inflated down, whereas the ring will hold it's value in real terms.

noviceoftheday Mon 05-Nov-12 07:22:10

I am so glad you decided to get the gorgeous ring Netguru! I don't think there is anything to feel guilty about and good you're not put off by the sanctimonious brigade hmm. Yes its a lot of money but it will give you so much pleasure to wear it and your dh pleasure to give it.

I have always loved the Boodles raindance ring and think your one is a very good version because it looks as delicate as the Boodles one. Other versions can look chunky. I have small childlike hands so this is important to me. I prefer platinum to white gold too. I loved your ring so much that I did not very subtly show it to my dh yesterday grin

whoneedstosleep Mon 05-Nov-12 09:35:56

I had my eye on a similiar one from Tiffany! It's lovely- enjoy it smile

noviceoftheday Mon 05-Nov-12 09:48:30

whoneedstosleep did you prefer the Tiffanys or Boodles one? Normally, I would go with Tiffany's but think in this case the Boodles original is nicer? i have looked at this ring a lot in the past!

Netguru Mon 05-Nov-12 09:52:22

I looked at both in bond steet last week. The Tiffany one is very pretty but has stones underneath which worried me as I thought I'd damage it.

If you are more careful than me, it is a beautiful ring.

whoneedstosleep Mon 05-Nov-12 09:55:34

The Tiffanys one is a staggering £7,600 and isn't any nicer than the boodles one.
The Tiffany one is chunkier.

noviceoftheday Mon 05-Nov-12 10:10:32

Thanks. Yes it's the chunkiness of the Tiffany's one that me off. I think both Tiffany's and Boodles are 1.5 carats and platinum but Boodles £1k more expensive so I am guessing the difference is diamond quality? Netguru's one is 1 carat and white gold but just as pretty as the Boodles one.

The other thing I thought about is setting and not choosing something too delicate. I have the Tiffany's cross and the top diamond has fallen out (and is lost) so I need to go and get it reset. It's either bad setting or design. My concern is that the same thing would happen with the Boodles one.

whoneedstosleep Mon 05-Nov-12 10:21:49

I am a platinum fan. But netguru's ring is gorgeous and wouldn't be something I would wear everyday so the white gold would be fine.

That is very dissapointing about the lost diamond. Do you think you could get the settings tightened?

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