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Do couples with a baby have to spend more on...

(9 Posts)
mameulah Mon 15-Oct-12 17:59:03 for couples without babies?

Our baby is due in November. We have really good friends who don't have children and I know they are planning on buying the baby an expensive gift. I always try and give thoughtful gifts that are a sensible price because I don't want people to feel they have to reciprocate and spend heaps on us.

So, do we carry on as before?

Or, do we carry on as before but also maybe make sure we pay for meals when we all meet up, therefore balancing the odds again?

Or, do we give them a substantial gift that more or less matches what they are planning on buying the baby?

I don't want to be tight. I also don't want to set up a ridiculous situation where for years we have to fork out heaps on expensive unnecessary stuff for each other.

Any wisdom much appreciated!

Heavywheezing Mon 15-Oct-12 18:01:58

No,I would buy them exactly what I would have done before.

Chances are you won't have anything, but the baby will.

It also will even it's self out over time when they have their own children and you will buy.

Loobylou222 Mon 15-Oct-12 18:03:07

To be honest, I think u should just spend what u can afford, I'm sure they will understand considering you will have a new born.
It shoulnt be about the money anyway, it's the thought that counts and if they really are good friends it won't matter to them how much u spend. smile

mameulah Mon 15-Oct-12 18:04:54

Thanks, that is what I thought. And I hope that they don't get us anything, especially because I get the impression they have big plans on buying the baby something expensive. I know that these friends really don't want children so that even itself out thing won't be a factor. It feels awkward because I don't want to embarrass them by starting something too much. Neither do I want them to feel that we are taking advantage of them.

DoodleAlley Mon 15-Oct-12 18:06:30

We have told some people just to buy presents for DS where we thought this would be a helpful suggestion

Clandy Mon 15-Oct-12 21:23:29

I just buy as I would previously have done for friends although now dd is a bit older I get a token gift from her like a photo in frame or something she has chosen as she enjoys giving gifts and celebrating with others.

RosettaIsMyFavourite Mon 15-Oct-12 22:23:57

I worry about this sort of equal-present thing. I buy for sibling and sibling-in-law and my nephew, but they buy for DH and I and our two DC. So they have to buy 4 presents, we only have to buy 3. So, should I be buying more expensive presents than then so it all balances out?!

loubielou31 Mon 15-Oct-12 23:25:37

Rosetta We've had this discussion today, I have a husband 2DSSs and 2DDs, DB1 is single (well gf but they don't live together) DB2 has a GF and Dnephew.
We are a family of six so if everyone got a gift we would definitely do best. I was wondering whether to suggest just getting one gift for the family or set a price limit/guide per family. It's mainly because buying six gifts is expensive no matter who you are.

mameulah Tue 16-Oct-12 08:21:22

It is such a conundrum! I think I have decided that we will do our usual sized gifts for everyone and be generous, as appropriate, in other ways, making meals or whatever.

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