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FN's Ponstastic Christmas Thread part Trois....

(839 Posts)
FellatioNelson Sat 22-Sep-12 06:43:07

....will be officially open for business on September 24th. I am just firing up the engines and dusting down the control room ready for action in case I forget to do it on the 24th

Do not post yet. Do not. Sit on your hands, ladies.

On your marks........................

champagnesupernova Sun 23-Sep-12 16:46:04

<marking place>
I have been a lurker on these thread but they move super fast
and I also have not been organised in years past.
Is it possible to ponce on a <ahem> streamlined budget?

VoldemortsNipple Sun 23-Sep-12 17:07:23

FN you shouldn't have posted this thread and expected us all to sit on our hands until Monday. It's like putting the dcs presents under the tree and expect them not to peal back the corners to have a peak.

And and and I'm in work tomorrow (stamps feet) Please open it early and I promise to buy a rustic bucket to brine my turkey.

FellatioNelson Sun 23-Sep-12 17:16:08

Nope. It can't be done. I tried to start early last year and I got soundly put in my place by the bah-humbugs who acted like I was doing something akin to Breaking Britain burning the bible for discussing the C word so early.

I think they just don't realise that is is necessary to plan certain things ahead if you are to make your Christmas properly poncetastic. I mean, really we could/should be making our puddings and cakes in July but I draw the line at discussing things then.

FellatioNelson Sun 23-Sep-12 17:16:48

Breaking Britain or burning the bible, that should have said.

Nagoo Sun 23-Sep-12 17:23:27


Infect me with the ponce. grin

LadySybildeChocolate Sun 23-Sep-12 17:53:43

I have an open fire in the study, and a fireplace with a log burner in the living room. I have to unpack the study before anything can be done to it though (and find somewhere for the wardrobe. Don't ask).

Swags on the top of picture frames look pretty. I used to trail one down the banister at my old house. smile

TeaOneSugar Sun 23-Sep-12 18:28:10

I'm looking at a 9 week old cocker spaniel sleeping at my feet and panicking about the christmas tree shock

skirt Sun 23-Sep-12 18:34:36

Marking place. I can't wait for tomorrow and am hoping for some poncetasticwrapping gift ideas. I've done the doilies, I've done the candy canes, I'm sick of brown paper and raffia. 2012 is going to be the year my gifts look like they actually contain something worth having. Waits patiently

LordFlasheart Sun 23-Sep-12 18:40:31

payday on Friday. My amazon basket is all full of stuff. I need to discuss whether i have to go out in the woods with the other Christmas ponces and gather bin bags of holly, or can i buy 'frosted spruce garlands' online in warmth and comfort and use them. Im guessing the woods

Jamdoughnutfiend Sun 23-Sep-12 18:41:40

First christmas at home for 3 years and have a house this year with ceilings and walls that is finally complete after 18 months of rennovations - I am so ready for a poncetastic Christmas. Spent last night reading Delia's Christmas book and am going to start my Christmas cake tomorrow - bring it on!!

UmamiOrange Sun 23-Sep-12 18:47:26

Clocking on for some ponce-lurking.

Taffeta Sun 23-Sep-12 18:48:27

<lines up Sarah Raven Christmas book and all ponce paraphernalia>

I'm reeeeeeeaaaady!!!!!!!!

skirt Sun 23-Sep-12 18:50:32

or can i buy 'frosted spruce garlands' online in warmth and comfort and use them.

No, no, no, no, no. You must gather your children and your dogs. Put cute woolly hats with ear flaps on the children and a jaunty beret on yourself. Take a wicker basket and some National Trust secateurs and enjoy your winter nature walk. Bring your glistening foliage back into your kitchen and you can all enjoy creating wonderfully unique centrepieces for your home.

You can then go online when the kids have gone to bed as you will I am sure, have thrown the misshapen, dripping monstrosities deep into the bin, whilst telling the weeping children that the dog sat on them.

dearprudence Sun 23-Sep-12 19:57:04

I am so ready for this.

MerylStrop Sun 23-Sep-12 20:22:28

So what are the absolute key elements and must-haves of a poncetastic christmas

Just so I can get my priorities right

Wolfcub Sun 23-Sep-12 20:22:42

Marking place. I am so ready for christmas this year, the cake and pudding making dates are in my diary, I've halfway through making mum's christmas present and I'm planning jams and jellies. Ponce me up Scotty.

winefairy Sun 23-Sep-12 21:27:02

Been looking forward to this thread again so much!

And just ordered that Sarah Raven book, thanks marssparklesdownonme

<resumes hand sitting to appease Fellatio>

seabuckthorn Sun 23-Sep-12 21:31:48

Sarah Raven book? I'm going to need this aren't I? My CK Christmas Organiser has dispatched so Amazon tells me grin

buzzgirly Sun 23-Sep-12 21:40:33

I really want a poncy Christmas! I will have it, it won't be like last years home-made Christmas failure - looks at one half made scarf that has been lying in cupboard since last November!

bumponboardagain Sun 23-Sep-12 22:15:37

Marking my place for tomorrow! Very excited to see this thread. Love Christmas, have loads of free time to prepare for it this year. A somewhat limited budget though.

Should I read up previous thread links as I missed them last year?

FredWorms Sun 23-Sep-12 22:21:11

marking place...

IvorHughJanus Sun 23-Sep-12 22:21:23

Marking place. I need as much help and encouragement as I can get with this Christmas thing. Last year I shopped on Christmas Eve and my pound shop tinsel got destroyed when the cat sneezed near it. This year I wll be poncy if it's the last thing I do.

Hassled Sun 23-Sep-12 22:27:47

Yay! So glad to see another poncey thread!

I have possibly the ultimate Christmas challenge.
DB's partner's parents are from a Southern US state. They watched the London Olympics. They liked the look of the place, and they may well be coming for Christmas (we don't live anywhere near London but in US terms it's probably a short stroll). I have never met them before. I need to make the place seem like some sort of Dickensian paradise and if it doesn't snow I'm fucked. This has to be the most Christmassy Christmas known to man.

StopEatingThatMud Sun 23-Sep-12 22:30:18

Marking place and eyeing up Sarah Raven's book...and snorting a little at Anthea Turner having her own Christmas book according to Amazon, that'll be...not quite to my taste methinks!

cushionpad Sun 23-Sep-12 22:32:26

You have a new recruit have just ordered Sarah raven book can't wait.........

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