So do you think I have spent an obscene amount on ds

[selphy]

My family have always thought that I spoil ds who will be 10 christmas day he is my only one.
I have spent £400 that is christmas and birthday combined.
So do you think this is way over the top as all my family seem to think so.

[JaxTellersOldLady]

IF you can afford it and havent got yourself head over heels in debt then you spend whatever you want on your child.

If you are going to be paying off cards and cant afford to live a decent life then you are being OTT.

Only you will truly know.

[MentalFloss]

I don't think it is that over the top if you can afford it.

I could never spend that much on each child at christmas because I have 4.

[ChippingIn]

No, I don't - some will - some wont.

I guess the only thing I would say is that if it has left you short of essentials or put you in debt, that it isn't necessary - but if you can afford it, it isn't anyone elses business.

[selphy]

I have afforded it okay and none of it is on the plastic.

[fortyplus]

God these threads are a bore but here goes... if you've bought loads of different things he doesn;'t really need just to excite him then yes yabu.

If on the other hand you've bought him something significant that he will value then no, you're not.

Christmas presents in our family have included a horse, expensive bikes, laptops and even a slalom kayak - all costing a fortune. But if there's nothing 'special' that the child want/needs then a budget of £50 - £100 is plenty.

In my ever so humble opinion

[selphy]

Well there is a xbox amongst it along with xbox games and some wii games.
along with a football strip, the odd craft item, some wrestling figures, the rest is a little trashy.

[ChippingIn]

Selphy - it sounds perfect to me. Tell your family that he is your son, it is your decision and there is no need to worry themselves over it.

[gillybean2]

Stop stressing or wondering what others think. He's your child, it's your money and you say you can afford it, so who cares what your family think!

[chrimblycompo]

I think £200 for each is ok
is the lounge covered in things to open on the day? It may be a bit overfacing/ daunting?

[norfolkBRONZEturkey]

Well I could be all judgy and say an xbox for a one year old? Or I could just say spend what you want, it's you who has to earn it.

[ChippingIn]

Norfolk - or you could read the OP properly and note he is 10 on Christmas Day

[norfolkBRONZEturkey]

I realised that after but had to go and plug my laptop in as it had died. I had read as he is only one not my only one. My apologies.
As I said its the ops money to spend how they want. My first comment was actually really to make the point whay does it matter what others think. I could say one thing but really its not my call (or anyone elses)

[domesticsluttery]

If you can afford it and want to spend it then why not? It is your business.

I spend more some years than others, for example if one of them needs a new bike or last year DS1 wanted a Nintendo DS then I spend more. This year they didn't want/need anything big and all said that they would rather put money towards our summer holiday (peak season Center Parcs with all the activities, we did it this year with money that my Grandpa left us and they really enjoyed and wanted to do it again next year) than have things just for the sake of it for Christmas.

But every family does things differently.

If you are going into debt to buy presents that your child doesn't need then YABU. Otherwise YANBU.

[ChippingIn]

Norfolk

You can't say 'I could say one thing' then not say it - this is unreasonable! Go on - hoist up your judgey pants and tell us what you were thinking!

[norfolkBRONZEturkey]

I was thinking I wish someone would spend an eighth of that on me

[Kewcumber]

don't tell your family then, in future. Problem solved.

In my opinion £200 on birthday and Xmas is a lot (even if I had the money) but who cares what I think - you certainly shouldn't

[ChippingIn]

Norfolk - I don't think you are being exactly straight with me You said 'It's not my call or anyone elses' implying you disagree with the money spent OR something she's bought - come on now... spill!!

[norfolkBRONZEturkey]

Yes I don't get why the op feels the need to ask. Either she thinks it's fine in which case why worry or she doesn't in which case why spend it. It felt a bit like boasting.
I admit I was shocked by the xbox for a one year but as that was my mistake of course it alters the whole of my thought process.
I personally think its a lot of money, but as I said it's not my call. And along the same lines it's not anybody elses call either.

[ChippingIn]

I think she genuinely wanted opinions - sometimes when your family are all telling you that you are doing something 'wrong' you just need to see what the outside world thinks :)

(I thought you were going to go all anti on the wrestling figures )

[norfolkBRONZEturkey]

I suspect football encorages more violence than wrestling does. Wrestling is probably better for some who fancies being an actor

[fortyplus]

I don't see a problem with buying a 10 yo an X box and games for Xmas so yanbu for that - but perhaps it would be more tactful not to mention to others in the family how much you've spent - that sounds like bragging however you put it.

[christmaswishes]

Hi selphy,

Its easy to get carried away. I love buying gifts for people. If you can afford it then its fine. Its upto you how much you spend. Noone elses business. Don't tell them how much you have spent.

Just out of interest whars your little one got? X

[GetOrfMoiLand]

If you can afford to do so.

When I was skint I got dd the bare basics - spent about £20 for Christmas.

However I can afford a lot more now - will be spending £900 on dd this christmas (2/3 of that is paying for a school trip in Feb, the rest is money and stocking)