Spending Christmas alone?(24 Posts)
Can anyone who has had to do this please tell me how to cope
I have 3 days on my own, no family for hundreds of miles and wouldn't dream of imposing on friends (not that I have any close enough to really)
Survival tips please!
the good thing about it is;
1) no fights
2) no bossy old aunties or bratty siblings
3) no crap presents you don't want
4) you can get up when you want & eat what you want
5) no fake cheeriness
xmas is WELL overrated - i only do it for dd - i cancelled it one year when i was a single girl - really much better!!!
get in all your fav films & music - definately NOT xmassy - cook a full dinner if you want - who cares if there are left overs.
alternatively, i've some friends who have helped out at homeless shelters etc & said it was good - not that kind myself though...
most importantly, remember you are TOTALLY not the only one.
I live in a fairly remote area with no transport otherwise I think I would expat
I feel like it's all being rammed down my throat, all this xmassyness, and I feel the least ever. Had a shit time recently and although the idea of 3 days stuck in the house appeals on one level (rest regroup recuperate etc) on the other hand I know I'm going to feel so miserable and either spend it in bed, or drunk
Thanks for tip about fave dvds etc Kathy, will get looking on amazon and treat myself to a few maybe. Really hope there aren't any other MNers facing the season alone though
I'm sure there will be lots of drunk threads, *&@?ing MIL threads, eastenders threads etc going all day on MN to keep you amused then...
I think I'd go with the DVDs, new books, (moderate) alcohol consumption and good food thing then. It sounds rather appealing (I'm not a huge Christmas-day fan, specially as I have to drive to and from my parents so can only have one glass of wine....).
Nationalelf, I remember my friend telling me about how her Christmas went after we were all back at work. Her kids had gone to their fathers parents for a few days, and she was on her own. she said she couldn't stand the thought of driving over 2 hrs to her parents and even less staying overnight.
I felt awful that she had not told us, she could have at least come for lunch. She said she re-upholstered the sofa, while she had the time and no disturbance! She did go out with the dog, though, for a good walk.
I always feel a bit low on Christmas morning, since FIL died it has been just DH and I. No parents or siblings, no relatives close by, friends all away or doing their own thing. I agree it's hard when everyone expects you should have a housefull, or be part of a housefull. Kathyb1 has lots of good points about the hard work bits of family gatherings. And by teatime we will both have cheered up immensely!!!
I think the key to this is to plan lots of things to do so you are never at a loose end. Stock up on all sorts of treats - DVDs, books or magazines, nice food, some new bath products - and set yourself tasks you have to do beforehand so you can feel a bit productive. I'm not talking about major hard work: if it were me I'd like to sharpen all my kitchen knives (can be done in front of a film) and sort through my wardrobe/linen cupboard. Also try to get outside for an hour or so every day so you have some fresh air and vitamin D in your system - exercise will help keep the blues away so if you are up for it, try going for a jog or at least a decent stomp around.
If you're worried about drinking too much then set a time before which you don't touch the stuff, the later the better, or promise yourself one day off the booze in return for an indulgent day with a bottle of champagne. If you don't have it in the house you can't drink it, so plan your meals and your drinking too if necessary. Or this could be a good time to start a detox if you are interested, and would be nice to get a head start on everyone else who will be starting on January 2nd.
I think 3 days alone could be a wonderful opportunity to recharge if you use it well. Enjoy it!
NES - i am on my own too this year, from xmas eve morning to boxing day night My DDs are going to their dads, and although i will be seeing them for an hour on xmas morning, it will be just me. Family is either 300 miles north, or 300 south.
I am trying to find some good dvds that i want to watch (am really hoping i can find little house on the praire) and maybe i will do some painting and diy while they are out from under my feet.
I share your apprehension though, and i think my only way forward is to plan and plan some more
Oh good, it's not just me. Except I am alone for TWO weeks
DS goes away when he finishes school next week and I won't see him til the New Year . He's 5
So we're doing christmas this weekend. Father Christmas might drop off a stocking for DS on Saturday night, when he's on a practise run with the reindeer
I'm going to decorate his room while DS is away.
thereisthesnowball: not sure about the knife sharpening....
Sorry to butt in, with no useful advice to the OP other than to use the time to really relax ( I once had two baths in one day, each with different bubble baths. Was luvly), but JetCat - is it the Disney Little House on the Prairie film you're after?
shodan - i dont think so, although i have seen that as well <get a life emote> - no, it is the original Michael Landon one. I keep meaning to order it from amazon, but i never get round to it. Either that or i find something else that needs buying - like kids shoes or something
Grockle - two weeks May i wish you all a very merry xmas for this weekend then, and enjoy your decorating!
I've only spent one Xmas on my own, and i felt terrible leading up to it, worried more about how i would feel than anything. I did all the things everyone here has suggested, stocked up on nice food, films, books, magazines etc - and i have to say it was BRILLIANT! Afterwards I found out that a friend had also been on his own, and he said if he'd known he would have invited me round - and I was so glad he hadn't known and invited me, because it had turned out ABSOLUTELY FINE!! I think it was other peoples expectations of what you SHOULD/SHOULD NOT be doing that stopped me looking forward to it in the first place. ENJOY IT!!!
...In fact, would you like to swap Christmases with me ?!!
The best Christmas I ever had was the one I spent alone in London. I bought myself a Fortnum's hamper, a lovely 3-bird-roast for one, a ton of DVDs and magazines, and lots of Lush bath bombs. No family stress, no travel, no arguments. It was bloody brilliant
I have spent Christmas and my birthday (Christmas Eve baby - nice one Mum) in a hotel alone in New Zealand.
The staff made a huge fuss of me and I had wonderful long baths with lovely oils, watched films and made everyone I have ever known call me to tell me what they were up to.
They did that out of guilt because they love me
You can drink beer in your jim-jams. Sing into a hairbrush etc.
I had a couple of wobbly moments but it turned out fine.
you could try Bridget Jones 1 & 2 because:
1. you realise lots of people are in the same boat
2. you'll feel younger
3. you get to be the one shagging Mr.Darcy
4. you see how crap being in a partnership can sometimes be
5. no reindeer jumper!
Thanks for all the replies
I have bought a (very small!) tree to try and start feeling a bit less humbug and have been on lovefilm for dvd inspiration, have bought the Radio Times and sat and highlighted all the things I want to see and I am searching out some nice fabric to make those cushions I always wanted to.
I still reckon I will be on here drunk and upset and rambling at some point though
Love your username op
if I was in your situation I wouldbuy myself lots of gifts, things like expensive smellies and pajamas etc. I would stock up on luxury food and drinks and make sure I had new books and films.
If it's any consolation I am working nights on christmas day and boxing day.
I offered to work so someone else could have the time off but they say the rotas are done and it won't be changed :/
Agrre with magichomes - it can be quite nice to have the peace and quiet, no stress, you can eat when and what you like, sleep as long as you like, sounds great to me!
I was alone for two years at Christmas because I lived abroad and all my friends went home to their parents, I didn't want to go with anyone as it's even more hard work when you're a guest in a strange family remembering to behave, sit up straight (ie not slouch on a complete stranger's sofa), don't get too drunk etc! I got myself some great books and watched a film, some treats to eat and enjoyed the peace.
If you'r efeeling lonely on 'the day' there will be plenty of people (if not quite as many as usual) on here to chat to I'm sure.
nes: your work people are bonkers - they should bite your hand off!
i wonder if your co-workers know what they said to you?
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