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I am getting a prenuptial before I get married. AMA

(125 Posts)
sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 21:51:51

I'm in the process of getting a prenuptial drafted for my other half to sign before we get married - AMA

OP’s posts: |
HelloViroids Thu 21-Jan-21 21:52:32

Do you live in England? If so are you worried about it being unenforceable?

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 21:54:36

HelloViroids

Do you live in England? If so are you worried about it being unenforceable?


I am in England. They are not legally binding however if done correctly they have to be taken seriously. I will also be getting a post nuptial so it is signed after married too to help in this case.

Without one it is 50/50 so it's worth having one there just in case

OP’s posts: |
PinotAndPlaydough Thu 21-Jan-21 21:59:05

Why? I presume you have assets/money/property you want to protect?

Newnamefor2021 Thu 21-Jan-21 22:02:39

Why?

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:03:00

PinotAndPlaydough

Why? I presume you have assets/money/property you want to protect?


Yes, an estate to protect should we divorce. It will be phased dependant on how long we have been together. It's not as straight forward as you just sign something to say they don't get anything or they get this percentage. You have to be fair and think about a lot of factors

OP’s posts: |
sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:04:10

Newnamefor2021

Why?


As above 🙂

OP’s posts: |
BarryWhiteIsMyBrother Thu 21-Jan-21 22:04:25

How did you first bring it up?

Namechangeforte Thu 21-Jan-21 22:04:40

What is the right way to ensure it is taken seriously in an English court?

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:05:22

BarryWhiteIsMyBrother

How did you first bring it up?


I have always been upfront that there will be a prenuptial in place if we got married... he is completely on board with it

OP’s posts: |
sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:13:34

Namechangeforte

What is the right way to ensure it is taken seriously in an English court?


Proper legal advice for both parties. Fair.
Preferably a while before the wedding - at least 28 days but the longer the better.
Full disclosure of assets from both parties

OP’s posts: |
Woollypulley Thu 21-Jan-21 22:14:41

Will it DEFINITELY hold up in divorce courts after 20 years?

LizFlowers Thu 21-Jan-21 22:15:29

Very sensible.

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:15:35

Woollypulley

Will it DEFINITELY hold up in divorce courts after 20 years?


No not definitely. They are not legally binding

OP’s posts: |
JetBlackSteed Thu 21-Jan-21 22:15:55

What factors do you have to consider to be fair?

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:16:13

LizFlowers

Very sensible.


Thank you

OP’s posts: |
HollowTalk Thu 21-Jan-21 22:17:14

My son has just married someone from another country - they had to sign a pre-nup. It just protects them in terms of what they brought into the marriage.

PurplePansy05 Thu 21-Jan-21 22:18:47

What if your circumstances change during the marriage and your DH becomes the richer party, would you proceed to vary the post-nup/have a new one drawn up?

Would he feel the same way as you and would want to protect his assets, are you both on the same page?

sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:20:18

JetBlackSteed

What factors do you have to consider to be fair?


If you have been married to someone for 6 months, you probably wouldn't give them the same as if you had been married 50 years. So it's looked at in a timescale.

If children involved, enough to fulfil their needs and requirements. For example, if they are used to a bedroom each, ensuring that if we divorce, they would have a bedroom each at both parents.

I am still waiting for feedback and initial draft so I will have more information regards this after more legal advice

OP’s posts: |
sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:22:46

PurplePansy05

What if your circumstances change during the marriage and your DH becomes the richer party, would you proceed to vary the post-nup/have a new one drawn up?

Would he feel the same way as you and would want to protect his assets, are you both on the same page?


We would deal with this should it happen but it will probably be very unlikely unless he wins the lottery

OP’s posts: |
sheerjewl Thu 21-Jan-21 22:23:39

HollowTalk

My son has just married someone from another country - they had to sign a pre-nup. It just protects them in terms of what they brought into the marriage.


Yes this is it. It is just for protection. No one knows what may happen in the future

OP’s posts: |
crazylikechocolate Thu 21-Jan-21 22:27:01

How much more than your partner do you bring to the table at the start ?

Fauchelevant Thu 21-Jan-21 22:31:41

How much does it cost approx to do all the legal stuff? Do your friends or his family know and how did they react?

PurplePansy05 Thu 21-Jan-21 22:33:37

Would you use your money to support him if he lost his job and/or got seriously ill long-term?

sheerjewl Fri 22-Jan-21 05:53:44

crazylikechocolate

How much more than your partner do you bring to the table at the start ?


Approximately £3 million more with more to inherit

OP’s posts: |

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