My partner is addicted to crack and heroin AMA

I’ve got one: are you or have you ever been a drug user yourself?

Why are they still your partner? I think I could support DH with this sort of addiction but I would definitely be divorcing him too.

Is your partner in recovery or still using?
Do you have kids / would you want them?
Have you ever considered leaving?

Why are you with him? Also do you have or want kids?

Nip this in the bud envolve a third party. Rehab or out you cannot do this alone. Make or break is the only answer save yourself years of misery

I’m guessing he’s a high earning/wealthy addict rather than a Trainspotting type addict. How often does he need to have ‘a hit’? (sorry I don’t know the vernacular).

I looked after someone in their last weeks. It was heartbreaking and they were a lovely person.

How long has your partner been addicted for? How did they get into it in the first place.

What sort of relationship is it possible to have?

Do you not want to take a step back and prioritise yourself?

How can this be better than being single?

I don't mean to sound unsympathetic, you must have a very hard life. I hope you feel that you could walk away, and you're not staying because you feel you have to.

In my limited capacity to understand this, I cannot imagine any other scenario besides feeling obliged to stay.

In my limited capacity to understand this, I cannot imagine any other scenario besides feeling obliged to stay

Love?

Do you have children?

Were they already an addict when you started a relationship with them? If yes did you know about it?

How did you find out about the addiction?
Has the pandemic affected your partner's access to crack and heroin, or made it more risky? e.g. police checks
Are you afraid your partner will die?

How did they get into it? If they are a “professional” type, who do they buy it from and where do they find dealers?

I obviously wouldn’t want to but I always wonder how people find out about where to buy drugs. I wouldn’t have a clue but perhaps I’m very sheltered.

Sorry I'm quickfiring as I think of more -

Are these the first addictions your partner has had, or do they have a history of addictive behaviour?
Is your partner typically a "happy" person?
Are you married or will you marry them in the future?

Holy cow batman heavy subject
Crack AND heroin😳
Surely one or the other would be enough😟
Ok my question is what's your opinion about legalisation of drugs, yes or no? Or should that be which ones and why 🤔

How well functioning are they day to day? Are they intending to get clean?

I worked in addiction services for a while and while lots of our clients were the (horrible) stereotype of a heroin/crack user, we had plenty who you wouldn't have known to see or interact with them. It was interesting and opened my eyes as to the stereotypes people have about drug users.

Slow response AMAs always remind me how horribly bad my patience is

Could anybody feel that love was enough?

I'm not judging, just viewing it from the outside. I stayed with an abusive man for far too long.

It eroded my self-worth. So, I suspect the OP will end up in the same place even if the man who takes her there has different problems.

Look after yourself OP.

I hope you have some boundaries that cannot be crossed in place.

Could anybody feel that love was enough?

I think I could. For a partner if they were trying to get clean, and it was relatively managed (as managed as an addiction can be). For a child, yes definitely.

If the partner were a bastard in other contexts or I didn't love them very much, definitely not though.

Why haven’t you left him?

crack and heroin? Both of them?

I 'd hope that I could love somebody without being in a relationship with them I could hope that they got clean, but I'd value my own survival and my own sense of myself enough to take myself away from the context of a relationship.

I think a 12 step programme suggests accepting a higher power than yourself, god as you understand it, and no romantic relationships. That's if you're trying to get clean obviously.

If he's not even trying........ I couldn't make that seem ok in my head.

You have to love yourself too.

Does he hold down a job? If he didn't have his own money, do you think he would steal from you? What's the average life expectancy for a user? Does he drive?

nearly all of them do “snowballs” so they mix the heroin and the crack and inject it together, the crack takes you up and the heroin brings you down again but it kinda works together to be a better hit apparently.

That's very concerning, snowballs are fucking deadly.

Honestly a bit of heroin is so much easier to live with! Sounds ridiculous but true!

Are you worried he's going to die? You seem a bit blasé about the whole thing, honestly (maybe not your intention though).