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Talk Roundup
8 June 2007

Calling all campers! Don't miss the Guardian's brilliant Guide to Camping, free with tomorrow's paper. Including recommendations of the best equipment and a comprehensive guide to Britain's best 50 campsites.

Is this the most middle class thing anyone has ever done? pondered Margoandjerry, who stayed up "late" one night this week to watch Mark Lawson interview Biddy Baxter on BBC4, "And I really enjoyed it!" she trilled. Hatrick confirmed her own middle-class credentials when she told us of her evening "amongst the Sculptures at the Henry Moore Foundation, eating ciabatta and olives and drinking mojitas whilst the girls danced about in their Boden dresses to the salsa music." Martianbishop had a picnic "and I packed roasted aubergines for us to have with the salad" while DaisyMOO's children took boiled quails' eggs to school in their packed lunch. Bet the School Lunchbox Police were well impressed.

"No! STOP!! Take your hands off the door handle! DO NOT COME IN! I am ALLOWED to go to the toilet ON MY OWN!!" roared ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands, who has decided to carve herself a niche of privacy after arbitrating between her 8 and 14 year-olds while sitting "mid-wee, with my knickers and jeans round my ankles." Charlottelouise outlined her open-door policy, "If I locked the door, I would have to endure her screaming whilst I went. And sometimes it takes a couple of minutes, so I have horrible image of me giving up and waddling to the door to open it." (Open door policy or not, Charlottelouise is perfectly capable of a "Bad Mother Moment - My DD has fallen asleep on floor, I just thought she was watching TV, and what am I doing? Writing about poo on the computer.")

It would be remiss of me I think not to include InTheWillows' Very embarrassing sexual problem, "For the last couple of months, every time DH commences a certain act (!), I pass wind." Yet I hardly feel it would be ladylike to go into detail here, so you will have to read the thread if you want to find out exactly what act ("oh GOD I thought it would be obvious what he was doing. This is going to be so much worse than I ever thought!" blustered InTheWillows') plus get some helpful tips ("Lie on the floor, grab your big toes with each hand, straighten your legs, and open your legs veeeeeeeeeeeeery wide. A couple of minutes should do it" suggested a very supple Desiderata).

What were you denied as a kid out of parental snobbery? asked Dogsby, who like many Mumsnetters was deprived of innocent pleasures such as ITV and brown sauce. Colditz wasn't allowed to go to the East coast for holidays, "We had to go to Wales and it was nice, but my friends used to go back to school with arcade tickets and sticks of rock and I had some shells." Botbot was not permitted "to become a troupe dancer (a bit like majorettes). As far as I was concerned, troupe dancing was the most glamorous thing in the world. My mum put a stop to that though, saying 'it's common'. I had to do maypole dancing instead." "Wow,"

MORNINGPAPER XXX

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