Make no mistake; what you have on this list here is the BEST of the television that the TV channels in their infinite wisdom have scheduled against the football. I know it doesn't read that way, but it’s true. Pretty insulting, really, that all Channel 4 could be arsed giving the football-allergic is wall-to-wall Come Dine With Me and I for one will not forget it.
Saturday 10th July
Match for 3rd place 7pm
Certainly fairweather football fans might be forgiven for wanting some alternative TV suggestions to this match - after all, do we really care who comes third? Happily, there's some pretty decent stuff on. Fans of the lovely Jason Isaacs can head on over to Channel 5 where he stars as Mr Darling/Hook in Peter Pan ('I do believe in fairies, I do, I do!') at 7pm. If that's too high brow, ignore the fact that Channel 4 in their infinite wisdom have plumped for The Return of the Magnificent Seven and instead split the difference by catching the last hour of off-the-scale parental indulgence in Teen Cribs on MTV until 8pm and then follow that with a blast of withering Hugh Laurie wit in House on FiveUSA from 8pm.
A selection of perfect Mumsnet recipes for TV suppers, whether you're watching the match or not.
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In possession of a fantastic lap fodder recipe and keen to share it? Add your recipe to our snacks section here
Sunday 11th July
Final coverage kick-off 6.30pm
Vuvuzelas at the ready, people, it’s all over bar the shouting (about how England wuz robbed etc etc yawnarama). To celebrate, we have The Karate Kid on Five from 4.30pm onwards, then (and OH MY GOD could this evening of chick flickery be any more condescending/appealing?) you can choose between Beaches on Channel Four at 7.10pm or Sleepless in Seattle on Five at 6.55pm. Now why didn’t they think of running these daft weepies in the first place?
See you at the Olympics, folks!