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Talk Round-up

3 August 2012 

Hey guess what... one or two (or 50 bajillion) MNers have been targeted by a well-known scam where thieves and brigands phone from abroad and try to get access to your personal banking details. But check it out, Iceflower is fighting back... 

"Good morning, ma'am, I'm calling from the technical department of Microsoft.

Me: Hello, oh I'm so glad you called. I have 10 computers that are not working.

Caller: I'm not able to fix it over the phone. You need the technical dept. 

Prostate Action

Me: You are the technical dept, you just told me.

Caller: I'm very sorry, I can't fix it over the phone. What's wrong with your computer?

Me: I want a full refund and I want you to come and pick up my 10 faulty computers.

Caller: <sounding perturbed> I can't fix it over the phone.

Me: I know you can't, hence I would like you to give me a refund and come and pick them up.

Caller: <sounding worried and less confident> Where do you live, can you give me your address?

Me: No. 10 Downing Street. When will you be coming?

Caller: Is this your number, '123 45678'?

Me: Yes, I'm only renting at the moment. When can you come to pick up my faulty computers?

Caller: <finding his stride again> They will come and pick them up in two days. Goodbye ma'am.

Me: Thank you, I look forward to my full refund for 10 computers.

Will I hear from them again? <innocent look>"

So what do we think? Will she? Pepperrabbit wasn't sure. "He may call back for your full bank account details, just to process the refund you understand? <equally innocent look>"

NaiceSpam, oddly, was feeling left out. "I've never had a Microsoft call, I'm longing for one," she complained, while Foshizzle had been targeted by a particularly angry 'softer' who had told her: "'MADAM YOU ARE BREAKING THE INTERNET!'"
"My response?" she said. "Oh crap, I'd better do something, hang on let me press some buttons. Oh no, what's that and what does that do and... oh dear, we've been cut off..."           

"Oi Mother," called ReindeerBollocks lovingly this week. "Get off the boards. I want to MN in peace. Thanks. Love, reindeer."  But who is she?

"She joined yesterday," said the loving daughter. "She won't reveal who she is, but she will know who I am." (She will now, you daft baggage). "I did warn her not to come on MN on a Friday, which of course means she will."    
70isaLimitnotaTarget had some advice for Reindeer's mum: "Tell her if there's a warning not to Google, then for the love of All Things Holy - don't Google. (Unless you have shares in Brain Bleach and Eye Plasters)."

"My mum's technological wizardry extends to 'OK' via text, so I know I'm safe," preened McPhee.
And finally... the Mumsnet Olympics. "What gold medals did you win today?" asked ClaireFromWork, basking in many victories in events such as "spending too much at the pick and mix, DC argument mediation, filing and wondering what Tree Fu Tom is all about". 

DeeLinquent won "gold in not killing any customers, silver in smiling at rude people and bronze in not telling people to eff off. (I said it in my head a lot)". You don't think she works for LOCOG, do you? 

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