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Talk Round-up

18 May 2012

"Etiquette advice needed: raw fish in stranger's coat sleeve." Well, this is the sort of thing that happens all the time, thankfully, so MNers will know what to do. First, a spot more detail from entropygirl, whose unfortunate dining companion has a coatful of carp.

"What does one do when one's 10-month-old PFB has thrown raw salmon so that it lands slightly up the inside of a stranger's coat sleeve? The event was unnoticed by the owner of the coat. The context, if it helps, was a Yo Sushi all-you-can-eat Sunday buffet."

"It's one of those 'let's just pretend I never saw that happen' moments," answered Fillybuster, wisely, "of which there will be many more."

"What? Yo Sushi does an all-you-can-eat Sunday buffet? Why didn't I know this?" shrieked an excited bigTillyMint, sidestepping the subject of leaping salmon. Presumably she considers it a small price to pay for as much tuna nigiri as a girl can consume.

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"Raw fish?" enquired outmonday. "I don't blame her for chucking it back. Would you feed her raw meat or eggs? Suppose you wouldn't mind her eating worms either." (I think we call that BLW, don't we?)

RabidAnchovy, clearly an expert herself on the decomposing fish front, didn't feel any urgent warning was required: "They'll notice when cats start following them home."

"I've just seen Alex Kingston in Waitrose," reported a star-struck KatieMiddleton this week. (Not the poster's real name, one presumes, or the celebrity balance would have been decidedly reversed.)  "I immediately had a nose at her shopping and came on here to report back."

"TENA ladys and vodka?" suggested VivaLeBeaver, perhaps thinking of her own Ocado list. "Did you bounce her curly curls?" asked GlaikitFizzog, curious as to the brand of hair-styling products in her basket. "Spill the beans! (Was it beans?)" begged RoxyRobin, before declaring: "DS once saw Jarvis Cocker in Waitrose in Sheffield (clearly not living like common people)."

Turns out she bought nothing more glamorous than "two enormous bars of Dairy Milk and two huge bottles of fabric softener".

"Nooooo! No Aspirational Toiletries?" cried a horrified ReshapeWhileDamp, comforted a little by the thought: "Hey, maybe she's using the fabric softener on her hair?"

CaseySchraeger had the most salutary of salutary tales, however, when it came to encounters with the rich and infamous. Be warned, cheery, welcoming MNers, this could happen to you. "I keep seeing Nick Clegg out and about with his sons. The embarrassing thing is that as he has a son around the same age as my DS and looks vaguely familiar I tend to assume he's one of the fathers from school and give him a big friendly smile, then walk another 10 paces and suddenly realise who he is. He ought to wear a badge or something." He really ought.

"It was acceptable in the '80s... Come and reminisce about your first job," said AgentProvocateur this week. She was gobsmacked to recall that: "We all smoked at our desks, and we had company ashtrays. Our MD had a box of cigarettes on his desk that he'd hand round at meetings."

"Oooh yes, smoking at desks," mused a nostalgic dweezle. "Me (I was the juniorest of juniors) making the tea for everyone and them all having cups and saucers, not mugs. The company chairman calling me 'dear'. Being told off for wearing trousers to work. No mobiles, no email - you had to pick up the phone and call someone or actually get up off your bum and go and see them - and I'm convinced we got more work satisfactorily done because of it."

Horsetowater, however, seems to have had the least technologically advanced job in Thatcher's Britain: "I used to stitch legal documents with a needle and cord. Do they still do that?" Well, do they? Embroider your answers on a postcard, please, and dispatch to MN Towers by pigeon.

(Or you could get less work done satisfactorily and interact wildly with us on Facebook and Twitter. Gawd bless the modern age.)

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