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Talk Round-up

20 January 2012Red Cross

Thanks, first of all, to Poledra, who was kind enough to mail me with the news that Bupcakes has at long last changed her full name. She graciously included a link to the thread, and having read it, it turns out old Buppers has an itch where a lady don't scratch. Any further details we leave you to search for yourselves, because it starts out filthy and descends to a vermivorously Dante-esque pit of hell. Abandon all hope all ye who enter there and all that. But apart from that it's fine... 

"Can someone please explain to me how it is possible to spend A THOUSAND POUNDS on a wallet?!" exclaimed VivianDarkbloom this week. She'd been out having a drink with another couple and the woman, "was talking about how she'd bought her DP a wallet for his birthday and said, 'I thought about how expensive it was but I knew he'd love it.' Her DP got out the wallet, it was pretty ordinary."

So now Viv is looking to spend a hundred or so quid on a new wallet for her DP (do keep up) and goes looking on the Harrods website (as one does) and... "I think I have found the aforementioned 'very expensive wallet'", she declares "...retailing at a cool £1060. I am in shock, and also very sad that I thought £120 would make him the wallet king, when they'd probably sniff at it."

Let's have a look then. <clicks on link> Aaaaah, it's made of crocodile.

"Maybe the cost related to danger involved in the kill?" offered sayjay, still keen to help out with Viv's shopping list. "Try armadillo, they strike me as docile."

Or maybe Viv should craft her own purse?

"Go on holiday to Florida, find a croc swimming in your villa pool, then bash it over the head," suggested caramelwaffle.

However, ZZZenAgain pointed out that Florida's crocs are protected, "so you would also need to do it in the dark".

Back to the original question, though... how is it possible to spend a cool thou on a wallet?

"It's very possible imo," nodded GirlWithPointyShoes. "Just scrape out all your brains with an ice cream scoop and go online."

And here we all are...

"Who would you send this to? What does it MEAN????" yelled Kenobi, quite maddened by a greetings card she'd just seen that "has a little line drawing of a unicorn and the words, 'If you could wish for a unicorn, where would you put it?'".

"The garden, obviously," said candytuft63 with a shrug. Although... "I wouldn't actually want a unicorn. Too pointy. Also, don't they have to be cared for by virgins?"

There's your insurmountable objection, not a lot of those on Mumsnet...

"American Mums, are any of you hearing the strange sounds that are being reported?" asked loopylou6. "Supposedly like a mechanical type noise coming from underground or the sky?"

No, like really...

"Great," moaned StellaAndFries, "today will be the day of the alien invasion and we will all be captured and taken into slavery and I'm still waiting for a bloody tax rebate to clear."

Smilerc was on hand to back up loopy's story, oh yes...

"I've read about it too. It's been heard in Canada and most recently in Costa Rica, as well as other places. It's a really eerie humming sound and no-one seems to know where it is coming from. Very strange. I'm sure you could Google it and I know there are loads on it on YouTube."

Mmm, might do that thanks.

Oh hang on, mystery solved. Here's an embarrassed-looking rubyrubyruby: "Sorry... think it may be my belly. <breakfast>"

AITCH
 

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