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Talk Round-up
24 June 2011

This week, echt felt it necessary to canvas the opinion of the Mumsnet Massive on the topic: "Why my DH is fabulous (or a pretentious twunt) – you decide." I think we all recognise stealth-boasting when we see it, but let us continue. "He's just tripped in, after a day hauling furniture, hanging paintings, digging up rose bushes, walking the dog, cooking my breakfast and lunch, to offer me an amuse bouche of scallop and garlic en croute," she preened.

"Has he got a brother?" quizzed keep, Paxman-like. "Did he wash his hands?" asked c0rn55ilk, rather more to the point.

"MN Jury, please say I am not BU," begged frownieface. The subject of her query? "Rinsing mince. Yes, really. I think that the idea of cooking mince, then rinsing it using a colander and putting it back in the pan is, well... weird. This has been a long-standing argument between me and DP."

"Why the hell would you do that?" asked a clearly horrified SauvignonBlanche. "I have never rinsed my mince," declared soverylucky. PrinceHumperdink, however, was on to something: "Rinsing mince. Does he do any other rhyming but otherwise illogical things? Is there a theme?"

"Does he freeze cheese?" wondered Pictish. "Does he clean his beans?" enquired usualsuspect. "Has he shaken bacon? Does all beef give him grief?" "I bet he washes squashes," snorted Asinine.

"'Mummy, can you pass me Boba Fett?' 'No, Mummy, that's Kitt Fisto!' How the hell should I know? Anyone else have no idea what their kids are on about?" wailed nevergoogle.

AurraSing sympathised: "DS was so cross he couldn't talk to me because I failed to tell the difference between Commander Cody and Commander Rex. They're clone troopers - they are the same!" SarkySpanner had her own tragic tale to add: "DS said: 'Mummy, who do you want to be in our Star Wars game?" Me: 'Nobody, I'm not playing.' DS: 'But you have to.' Me: 'OK, I'll be Princess Leia.' DS: 'No, I think you'd better be Chewie'. Little fecker."

"I think I am usually Asoka," sighed nevergoogle. "I've reminded them that even Darth Vader is probably good to his mother."

And finally, by popular request (well, two people, one of whom owns him [hmm]), a mention for MN's latest mascot, Mortimer, the "baby crow", found in SarahStratton's utility room.

In finest Blue Peter tradition, his name was chosen by MNers from a list that included Edgar Allan, Sheryl and Russell, and he is safe and well (pics of the handsome fellow on Sarah's page) having been taken to the vet.

"They are going to give him a bath, clean his battle wounds and give him some antibiotics," she reported. "And he's a raven apparently, not a crow. Vet said their tails were different. He's rather nice, sat on my finger and ate some mince." Very cute.

But did she rinse the mince? DID SHE?!

AITCH

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