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26 November 2010
Over to our global politics correspondent, cupcakesandbunting, for a live breakdown of the crisis in North-East Asia. "Korea - it's all kicking off," she reported, while carrying 'a cup of hot Bovril into the Anderson shelter'.
"I was just going to put a paper bag over my head and crawl under the table," said HidingInTheBackRow, while a gloomy paulinefouler was "thinking about getting the 'oh f*** rucksack ready'". Cupcakes, however, was determinedly chipper: "It'll be fine! It's just like the '80s again! The Tories are in, we're wetting ourselves over the future king getting spliced and cacking our pants over some unhinged despot with his finger hovering over the FIRE button <puts Wham! Rap on the cassette player>."
LBsmum wanted clarification about the seriousness of the situation: "Don't know about DEFCON 1 - BBC News 24 is wall-to-wall royal wedding, should I be quietly comforted by this? If it was a really dire situation surely we would be hearing all about it? Oh good, James Whittaker is pleased it's at Westminster Abbey, la de la de dar (boom)." S. Korea it is then!
NB: for those confused by the current escalation (and do pay attention at the back there, Mrs Palin), cupcakes also devised a handy 'Which Korea Are We Most Frightened Of?' memory aid: "N. Korea is like the Charlie Sheen of nations - volatile, unpredictable and wild-eyed. S.Korea is a bit more Mickey Rourke - still loony but the safest bet."
Homegrown politics now, as a furious KatieScarlett asked: "AIBU to be angry at DS for clegging me?" Clegging, it transpires, is now accepted MN terminology for 'when you promise that you will do something and then do the complete opposite'. The lad in question had said he would do some dishes but had instead left them in his bedroom. "You have been well and truly clegged," said an outraged LynetteScavo, "you must put a stop to this behaviour immediately... before all young people think it's acceptable, and the country goes to the dogs. Oh look, it already has!"
"Where can I send him for de-clegging therapy?" asked his worried mum. "Or should I just accept it and bid him join the young Liberal Democrats?" "Tell him that even politicians are not allowed to lie to their own mothers," suggested MerryMarigold kindly. But MadamDeathstare counselled: "Do an Obama right back at him. Stand in the middle of the house yelling at everyone indiscriminately until things are fixed."
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