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FAMILY-FRIENDLY SKI HOLIDAYS Ski 2 is an independent operator specialising in the family-friendly Italian resort of Champoluc. With a range of over 25 hotels, from budget to deluxe, Ski 2 allow arrivals on any day of the week and holidays of any duration. They run their own British ski school and British-staffed nursery for younger guests, exclusive to their clients. / 01962 713330.

Talk Round-up
12 February

Luxury Family Hotels


Yuck! Just had the most disgusting soft play experience, squealed littleducks, after discovering that her skirt had efficiently wiped up a large toddler-related puddle as she descended a slide: "Some toddlers gave me very strange looks as word went round that someone had wee-ed on the slide, and I was the only visible person with a wet patch." It turned out that soft-play horrors were worryingly common: "DS was at a party once and found a dead rat in the corner of a ball pool," shuddered serinBrightside. "It was one of the nicer places too, all leather sofas and good coffee!" "My phone fell out of my pocket in a ball-pit-in-hell soft play once," recalled mumofmonsters, "after 20 minutes of searching, I thought I had found it: I pulled it up from the abyss bottom and it was a rock hard poo."

This week a journo at the Independent was feeling rather miffed that politicians were paying attention to Mumsnetters, because proper hard-working parents like herself were much too busy working to Mumsnet: "If Dave or Gordon wants my vote, they can tell me to my face, not hide behind the skirts of the smug mums."  Professional hack AitchTwoOhOneOh was surprised that allegations of smugness were permitted: "My editor takes the view that unless you can prove actual smuggery with a quote then it just makes the writer look a bit needy and crap." Stealthsquiggle was intrigued: "What is the scientific test for actual smuggery in a quote - or is it at the discretion of the editor?" "There are lots of types of people who need to be superior," noted Custardo, "and here emergeth a new one: 'I work too hard to Mumsnet'." "There is always time to Mumsnet," snapped wasabipeanut, "she needs to get an iPhone."

Meanwhile, we wondered whether there is any way of measuring whether you really need to do more pelvic floor exercises. "These things can be scientifically measured with probes and electronic displays and stuff," reported lovemynano, before reassuring us that her experience involved a small display in a private gynaecological setting. "I don't want to give the impression that my pelvic strength was beamed live on telly like the X Factor or anything." Southwestwhippet bragged: "In my wilder youth I used to be able to smoke a cigarette using my pelvic floor." "You need to be able to make him wince," divulged hardcore ggirl, although MoreCrackThanHarlem suggested this effect might just be from the visual display: "In the bath it reminds me of an exotic marine creature swaying with the current."

SpringHeeledJack has performed the ultimate flounce: "I've finally had my fill of Real Life. Mindless repetitive toil. I hereby de-register from RL in order to spend my time more productively in worthwhile activities on here." "I'm with you," screeched an excited onebatmother, "I'm downsizing. Just need laptop and a chair now." "Is this just for Friday night or forever?" asked ILoveTIFFANY. "Until the youngest is about 21 I think," decided LeninGrad. "I am in bed on my iPhone," announced Nymphadora: "DH hasn't noticed yet - I left him about 15 minutes ago watching my Farmville plant seeds." "What's this 'Real Life'? Have I missed something?" panicked serenity. "Is there a link?"


WIN A PIGGY BANK SIGNED BY GEORGE CLOONEY! Help support PiggyBankKids, the charity supported by Sarah Brown. Everyone who hosts a Big Night In or buys something from the PBK shop between now and 21 February will be entered into a prize draw to win a piggy bank signed by George Clooney or Ruth Jones (Nessa of Gavin and Stacey fame).

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