IT'S BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH and we're delighted to be working with Breakthrough Breast Cancer. To find out Mumsnetters' top 10 bits of advice ever - and for more information about how you can reduce your risk of developing breast cancer - click here.
2 October 2009
"I panicked feeling unprepared for parenthood at 38 weeks, confessed dragonbutter, and took a tree identification course to help me be the kind of parent I wanted to be. He'll be five this week and has still never asked us about particular types of trees." Morningpaper (for it was she) confessed to taking golf lessons in her third trimester: "I thought, 'my last few months of freedom to learn something new!' So I panicked and chose golf." Artichokes genned up on different schools of parenting thought and then created an Excel table with the pros and cons of each: "DH was made to study the table for several hours ahead of a conversation about what kind of parents we should be. The conversation proved inconclusive, so several friends were invited to add their opinions after studying the table sent to them via email."
There were tales of amusing mispronunciations this week from SalopianGirl, whose DD asks for a 'chocolate cat' (Kit Kat) and calls coleslaw 'salad claw'. "DD asked me fasten her kangaroos yesterday," grinned Plonker, who duly fastened her dungarees, while apostropheisback's DS wanted to know whether all cars have 'divorce pipes'. lucysmum was rather concerned to be called the 'church trespasser' (she's the treasurer, honest). But there was a worrying culinary challenge when BirdyArms was asked: "Shall we knead the bread with our nipples, mummy?" Fortunately, they used their knuckles instead.
Mrsruffallo's feathers were ruffled this week after a date with a greedy chum who always nabs the breasts from the chicken platter when they visit a 'chicken restaurant': "I am always left with the leg. Am I being unreasonable or petty to be annoyed? I feel like slapping her hand and shouting 'share!'" "I would wait until she has helped herself, then distract her and grab her breast," was ToffeeCrumble's rather confusing advice, although others were perturbed by the chicken restaurant phenomenon: "Why would you go to a restaurant that only serves chicken and, to top it all, calls itself Chicken Cottage?" clucked a baffled pointydoug. GeekIsGood couldn't resist a browse around the Chicken Cottage website but was unconvinced by its slogan: 'Chicken You Can Trust': "I wonder what the general view on the trustworthiness of pigs is?" "I wouldn't trust sheep," advised country bumpkin GetOrfMoiLand, "I was chased by a flock through a field once."
There is nothing that can prepare you for the shock of picking up your 8 year old daughter to find her wearing glow in the dark phalluses hanging from her ears, announced a shocked Aimsmum, whose DD unearthed the tasteless jewellery from her grandma's drawer: "She thought they were dinosaur bones." There are some things even a tree identification course can't prepare you for.
You have received this email because you are a registered member of Mumsnet. We do not want to send email to people who don't wish to receive it. If you would rather we did not send email to you, please reply to this mail and put the word "unsubscribe" in the first line of your reply. We sent this email to #email#. To check your registration details, log in at http://www.mumsnet.com/member/. If you don't remember your Mumsnet password, you can get a reminder.