To subscribe to the Mumsnet Talk Round-up, please do so on your member registration page.
To unsubscribe click here.counter

Mumsnet Logo Mumsnet Pregnancy Guide advert

PREGNANCY: THE MUMSNET GUIDE Take delivery of our latest arrival by bagging your copy, then rifle it for your quotes, rate it on Amazon - and rave about it to your mates. We want as many mums (and dads) as possible to benefit from helpful and hilarious Mumsnetter wisdom.

Talk Round-up
25 September 2009

What things has Mumsnet made you do? asked Crapweasel, who has bought a Roomba and "upgraded Frootshoots from 'Hmm, a bit vivid' to 'Stuff of the devil'." The highly suggestible TheInvisibleManDidIt "attempted a cartwheel in the living room, just to see if I can still do one, and smashed a vase and squashed a cat in the process". Sazisi blamed Mumsnet for the fact that she is now an avid reader of the Daily Mail website: "I'm quite angry about this actually. I was pure as the driven snow before. Now I go on there and read all kinds of dross for hours." And I'm sure we can all sympathise with CommonNortherner, who says: "I have formed an attachment to the [hmm] emoticon and use it in my head. I think it's the best emoticon I've ever seen and I want it on a t-shirt or a cup or something!"

I received an unasked-for catalogue today with the by-line: Interesting Things for Intelligent People, bragged Slubberdegullion: "It couldn't have come at a better time, as DD1 told me solemnly yesterday that Nina (and her five neurones) was cleverer than me. Well, ya boo sucks Nina, look at what I can buy for myself now. A Frida Kahlo bracelet and lion head soup bowls." "Do buy something from them," encouraged VulpusinaWilfsuit, "it will be the shopping equivalent of joining Mensa." travellingwilbury perused their website and rather fancied a book light, but whomovedmychocolate advised against it: "I have tried all manner of clip-on lights but they are all a bit crap. Now I put a pillow over DH's head and turn a lamp on." Slubberdegullion couldn't think of anyone she hated quite enough to give a heat-activated Global Warming Mug showing rising sea levels: "Here you are my dear, it's a Death of Norfolk mug!"

What's the best snippet of conversation you've overheard? asked Hormonesnomore, who heard a mum recounting how she was reunited with a missing piece of jewellery: "...then when I changed Jade's nappy - there it was!" gremlindolphin overheard two old ladies recalling a glorious past holiday: "Oh yes, dear, that was the place you sat on the Rottweiler, wasn't it?" WickedWench overheard an elderly man on a train asking a favour of his wife: "Can you get the bag down from the luggage rack, please Marjorie? If I try to stand I'll hurt my testicles on the edge of the table." And ElvisLovesEssex recalled a teen on a bus telling his mate about the age of consent: "That's when you don't have to ask her mum's permission anymore before you have sex."

Am I being unreasonable to want to have a poo in peace once in a while? demanded Grisette: "DH gets this pleasure every day when we stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, prevent the dog from barking etc while he spends half an hour 'contemplating his day'." "That's what going to work is for!" trilled WOHM TheMysticMasseuse. Poor LadyOfTheFlowers' self-esteem takes a battering while both sons spectate as she goes about her business: "They just have to be there, not necessarily doing anything, just stood, leant against the bath, supervising me. Then commenting on how big my bum is when I get off."

I weighed my breasts last night, reported FabBakerGirlIsBack, proud owner of 12lb headlamps: "I can't lose the damn baby weight and wanted something to blame. I knelt on the floor, put the scales on the bed and put my breasts on the scales." Her DH was surprised, but lots of Mumsnetters had already weighed their bosoms. ByThePowerOfGreyskull's were about 6lb each: "That was with DH standing behind me taking the weight of one at a time." Moosemama measured her mammoth mammaries after having her DS: "Digital scales on the dining table, then on the floor and got exactly the same reading both times - they were a whole stone!" Highly competitive verygreenlawn embraced the challenge and weighed both her own and her husband's: "DH's are about 300g, but his are more pert than mine." "I did mine in the post room at work out of sheer boredom," yawned CornishKK. "I don't think they were 12lb-ers but I do remember they would have been fairly expensive to post 1st class." Measuring your norks on the kitchen scales – just another thing Mumsnet has made us do.

MORNINGPAPER XXX

FOLLOW MNHQ's TWEETS. Keep in touch with what's happening on Mumsnet by following tweets from the Towers on your computer or mobile.

You have received this email because you are a registered member of Mumsnet. We do not want to send email to people who don't wish to receive it. If you would rather we did not send email to you, please reply to this mail and put the word "unsubscribe" in the first line of your reply. We sent this email to #email#. To check your registration details, log in at http://www.mumsnet.com/member/. If you don't remember your Mumsnet password, you can get a reminder.