The 11 worst workplace blunders known to woman
We've compiled a selection of MNers' very best workplace mishaps (including *that* Angela Hernandez story).
- "I once got caught by the headteacher of my first school (when I was a teacher), pushing a wheeled drawer unit down the corridor, and flinging myself onto it to ride along, pretending to be an aeroplane.
It didn't help that the headteacher was showing round prospective parents."
- "When asked by our junior what I would like for breakfast, I called across the desk: 'mine's a ginger muffin'. I am a redhead."
- "I once farted while standing in a quiet corridor showing a new member of staff around the building. It was loud and unannounced.
I paused momentarily and having assessed the situation, carried on as if nothing had happened."
- "I over-rehearsed my equal opportunities spiel for a job interview at a disability charity. I messed it up though, and said: 'I believe in equality of access for all life forms'.
I then imagined aliens using ramps to get into supermarkets and got the panic-stricken giggles. You know the kind that comes out in a kind of blast? They looked generally unimpressed.
Didn't get the job."
- "My father once addressed a press conference to do with the Civil Liberties Lobby and called it the Civil Liberties Lobberty throughout."
- "When email was quite new and Microsoft Office was the new way of sending email through the office, I set up an address list on my home computer with the team's email addresses. So I could tell them apart, I called them helpful names like 'Dave the IT guy' etc.
Sadly I didn't like all my colleagues and I was also unaware that when you send a message to everyone in the group, their names come up in speech marks at the top of the email.
My apologies go especially to Floppy Dick and Piers the Pompous Prick."
- "I delivered the same 45-minute lecture to the same group of women within two days. No one had told me that the same women met under a different name. I even added the jokes in the same place."
- "I once arrived late in the midst of a cycling-to-work health drive, gasped down a can of Coke (so much for the health drive), answered the urgently ringing phone with a 'from the depths of hell' resonating belch, and hung up."
- "I used to work in A&E. I once stuck my head round a cubicle curtain and said brightly to the woman sitting on the bed: 'The doctor will be in you in a minute...'."
- "As a trainee lawyer in a very, very boring meeting, I managed to staple my thumb by fiddling with a stapler. I had to run out of the room clutching my hand. I didn't scream until I was outside."
- "I started a new role in my company and went to a conference with representatives from all the company sites who were now relying on me to ensure the correct products reach them with the correct test reports, labels and packaging.
I introduced myself by saying 'Good morning, my name is Angela Hernandez'. A voice from the back went, 'no, it isn't'. The real Angela Hernandez (our Quality Director), known to them all for the past 25 years, looked very confused as to why I was apparently trying to impersonate her. Not so confused as I looked, obviously.”
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