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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Not allowed to be a "miss"

97 replies

Blue14 · 10/01/2016 08:35

"Miss" is my preferred title, I hate "Ms" as being single is a very important part of my identity which I want reflected in my name.

However, there are many situations when I am denied the right to use the title "Miss", for example on my credit card, and on my work ID.

This makes me angry, but I am particularly angry now, having just read on another thread that should a MALE which to be called "Miss", it would be illegal to refuse permission, in NY at least, although I suspect many other places would also take that view.

Angry

OP posts:
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BIWI · 10/01/2016 08:43

What do people say when you challenge them on this? Assuming it's true, of course? Hmm

Why not just give your name rather than a title? Why does a title matter rather than who you are?

And what happens in NY, on a legal basis, is nothing to do with what might happen here, legally.

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Savagebeauty · 10/01/2016 08:46

I've divorced but am still Mrs on everything as I CBA to change.
I hate Ms. I have no feeling either way about Miss.
Id rather be known by my name, not a title.
I do quite like Dame Grin

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BIWI · 10/01/2016 08:49
Grin
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VulcanWoman · 10/01/2016 08:51

I like Colonel.

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CallieTorres · 10/01/2016 08:55

Thats bollocks, they should put the title you actually want - what kind of place do you work at (big / small company)

My work id doesnt have titles (probably for this reason) they're not really needed are they?

Credit cards normally have titles in the way that you signed up for them, so if you want a Ms/Miss just tell them - you shouldnt need to make a fuss about it

Have you told them they have it wrong, or have you come here first?

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BertrandRussell · 10/01/2016 08:58

You are not denied the right to be miss on your credit card- they will use whatever title you ask for.

Work? Take it up with personnel.

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Lweji · 10/01/2016 09:02

The whole problem is needing a title.
Why should credit cards have one?

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BertrandRussell · 10/01/2016 09:04

I agree. But if they do, it should certainly be what the person wants. As, I am pretty sure it is.

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Whatdoidohelp · 10/01/2016 09:04

You pick exactly what you have on your cursor card. I don't know how I did It as it wasn't on purpose - I don't have any titles on my cards.

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DulcetMoans · 10/01/2016 09:05

I've not been given the choice twice - was was an online booking for a restaurant. It did have Dr though so I put that. Dr Dulcet!

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Savagebeauty · 10/01/2016 09:05

Lol @ Colonel

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CallieTorres · 10/01/2016 09:12

I have a title on my cards as it cuts the risk of fraud by roughly half (well probably less now with chip n pin)

mrs s smith or mr smith or s smith

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PalmerViolet · 10/01/2016 09:23

I'm finding it really difficult to believe that a teacher is not allowed to use Miss at work.

Why would you have a title on your credit cards? Unless you live in the US, in which case, just get your photo put on them.

Hating 2 letters doesn't seem very rational either.

If I had to though, I'd quite like Marchioness

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BertrandRussell · 10/01/2016 09:38

You know what I hate? At my ds's school all woman teachers are Miss (no last name) and all male teachers are Sir. But much worse- they are referred to a "a Miss" or "a Sir" as in "Go and find a Sir and ask her for some paper" "See that Miss? She's the one to ask"

It make me want to gnaw my own leg off.

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CallieTorres · 10/01/2016 09:50

thats a tough-y BR, what would you prefer? all called Sir? or the Miss called Ma'am?

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thatstoast · 10/01/2016 09:52

How frustrating. Santander wouldn't put my double-barrelled name on my debit card when I got married. Needless to say I don't bank with them anymore. It's difficult to vote with your feet when your job insists on Ms though. Have you questioned why?

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BertrandRussell · 10/01/2016 09:56

Adressed and talked about as Mr X or Ms X. Or, if the particular teacher really insists, Miss or Mrs X.

I can just about deal with them being addressed as Sir or Miss if absolutely necessary. But "a sir" or "a miss"? Never!!!!!!!!

Seems quite simple to me!

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eurochick · 10/01/2016 10:00

Try hsbc. It took about 8 years of trying on and off to get them to take Miss off my card. I haven't been Miss since my early teens. I prefer Ms. I started banking with them at 27....

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reallybadidea · 10/01/2016 10:09

BR - maybe the school could go back to 'mistress' or 'master' as in 'the Games mistress' and 'the history Master' a la Enid Blyton?!

OP - why not print out a little sticker saying 'Miss' and put it over the 'Ms'?

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CallieTorres · 10/01/2016 10:10

I understand what you are saying BR, but sometimes you just want to say oy you!

my DS calls mr x, and miss x - but some in his class say sir/miss

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helloelo · 10/01/2016 10:17

France is bad on so many feminist issues but they have a law that banned miss (Mademoiselle) all together. You're either female (Madame) or male (Monsieur) and that's it, nothing to do with marital status. No other titles allowed.

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Trills · 10/01/2016 10:21

I have a friend who teaches languages and instead of Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssss she gets Madaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame.

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NotCitrus · 10/01/2016 10:54

What about "that teacher?"

I know I got to choose any title with a John Lewis credi card - I have Dr to help reduce fraud but before that it was blank.

My godmother insisted on Miss but that was because she was rightly proud of supporting herself without a husband or family, setting up a business, etc, from the 1920s. I'd hope that wasn't such a big deal nowadays.

The use of 'Mrs' for anyone with a child seems to be endemic in healthcare now, and for parcel deliverers, so I suspect Miss will die out for anyone above ten, just like Fraeulein and Mademoiselle.

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BertrandRussell · 10/01/2016 12:02

Just wondering where the OP is. Perhaps the thread didn't go down the feminist and/or trans bashing line she was hoping for?

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BIWI · 10/01/2016 12:07

GF - 0
MN - 1

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