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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

When was the last time you had cunnilingus? Bless your heart.....

25 replies

sassandfaff · 15/07/2015 17:13

Said in a debate arm pit hair!

And by a self confessed feminist!

Have we gone backwards?

It's bad enough getting this argument by hairy hands.....

Restore my faith please?

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sassandfaff · 15/07/2015 17:13

About arm pit hair

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InnocentWhenYouDream · 15/07/2015 20:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

morethanpotatoprints · 15/07/2015 20:15

me too.

Actually, last night. My dh is fantastic and I love it.
What has this to do with feminism? Is it the word itself? Should I be saying he went down on me?

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InnocentWhenYouDream · 15/07/2015 20:22

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Koalafications · 15/07/2015 20:24
Confused
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BakingCookiesAndShit · 15/07/2015 21:00

If I'm reading it right, it's yet another body hair thread.

OP has, somewhere, said that she has armpit hair, and some kind person has asked her when she last had cunnilingus given that no self respecting man would go down on a woman who wasn't as bald as a newborn

I might be wrong though. Either way, I'm not up for yet another thread where random people tell me that I must stink and be really dirty because I don't follow whichever level of epilation they deem normal.

Because who needs to listen to women like that?

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sassandfaff · 15/07/2015 21:09

Sorry.

Yes I mean the, you are uptight therefore you haven't had oral sex recently argument.

She believes arm pit hair is not a feminist issue and despite people explaining that some feminists think it is, due to the fact that men aren't told to shave it off because it's disgusting, stinky, unhygienic (all adjectives she used herself to describe arm pit hair on feminists) she actually wrote word for word the above title of this post to a fellow feminist.

She called them extremists and hippies....

And not real feminists as arm pit air was a non feminist issue.

I was despairing.

In fact I am despairing of a hell of a lot of comments on the feminist pages on Fb. I'm beginning to believe a lot of people who are not feminists post firstly and a lot of women who identify as such, say really misogynistic things. Hmm

I must be spoilt with all the articulate intelligent stuff that I read on here.

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Koalafications · 15/07/2015 21:29

I don't get the obsession with body hair on MN.

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sassandfaff · 15/07/2015 21:40

I wasn't aware there was an obsession? Is it for or against?

I think body hair on woman looks less attractive than no body hair. But think body hair on men is more attractive than not.

But I understand that I've internalised social norms to feel like that.

I'm also very meh about it, because I have rarely shaved in the last few years.......

I may find it more attractive to be hairless, but my CBA attitude overrides that. Grin

I'm just appalled that a woman who believes she believes in equality, can try and shut someone down my making out she must be a frustrated uptight person.

Shock

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morethanpotatoprints · 15/07/2015 22:02

Thanks, that cleared that up.
I have some arm pit hair as I have a mole and won't remove hair from too near it.
When I can be bothered I remove it, dh isn't bothered one way or the other.
I think I'm a feminist, I believe in choice and equality.
Not sure if this helps OP.

You are what you are feminist or not. If you like hair keep it, if you don't remove it. I don't understand this obsession neither.

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Koalafications · 15/07/2015 22:09

Yes, there is an obsession with certain subjects, for example all of these subjects are quite controversial:

  • Toilet brushes
  • P&C parking spaces
  • Pushchairs on buses
  • Parking spaces
  • Cat poo in gardens


And bloody body hair.
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sassandfaff · 15/07/2015 22:32

Oh I hate toilet brushes. Rank.
And cat poo on my garden.

Not bothered about the others.

Smile

Well, all my comments have been removed. Hmm despite someone calling feminists who don't shave their arm pits as disgusting, hippie, stinky fuck, extremists, being left to stand.

Apparently I'm not allowed to challenge her opinions.

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ShipShapeAhoy · 15/07/2015 23:03

I thought it was about the cunnilingus comment, not to start a debate on body hair? Of have I misread?

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ShipShapeAhoy · 15/07/2015 23:04

Or*

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sassandfaff · 16/07/2015 07:25

Yes shipshape it is about the comment.

It's an awful way to shut someone down when a man does it. I'm actually quite speechless that a feminist did it.

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SweetAndFullOfGrace · 16/07/2015 09:13

Feminists do un-feminist things. I do all the time.

Is it tiresome and sad that women police each other in terms of adherence to social beauty norms? Yes.

Are social beauty norms for women more onerous to maintain than those for men? Yes.

Is this patriarchal bollocks reinforcing women's role as decorative? Yes.

But I don't think it's any more or less problematic that someone who identifies as feminist said it. Most people are entirely capable of cognitive dissonance, after all.

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JohnFarleysRuskin · 16/07/2015 09:19

It is an idiotic and misogynistic thing to say, isn't it.

the sentiment is: 'shut up, you're too ugly to shag- so your opinion is crap.'

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sassandfaff · 16/07/2015 10:23

sweet I just think it's worse that she identifies as feminist, tells everyone hair is disgusting, makes you stink and an extremist and when you point out it doesn't make men stink, you told to go and have an orgasm, you are obviously frustrated.....

I'd find it equally as horrible if a black person in an anti racist movement started saying insults that traditionally white people use against black people to silence them.

To me, they are not worthy of belonging to a group that fights this shit, if they perpetuate this shit. Surely?

John you saying I'm ugly?! Wink Grin

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YonicScrewdriver · 16/07/2015 16:06

Oh now I understand!

I thought she was saying women with armpit hair didn't get sex, in fact she was saying get laid and chill out.

Either way, she's a twit.

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SweetAndFullOfGrace · 16/07/2015 16:20

Oh I agree her feminism is absolutely questionable if she says stuff like that. And saying stuff like that really isn't ok. Agree with Yonic that she's a twit.

I just find that if we focus on what feminists "should" do it sidelines the debate into policing each other's feminism, rather than the actual shitty anti-woman behaviour in question.

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sassandfaff · 16/07/2015 17:31

It wasnt really about what we should do at first sweet. It was an article about Miley Cyrus showing off her armpit hair and how this was good was females etc.

And then the twit women wrote;

Hair has nothing to do with feminism but everything to do with hippies. You "feminists" are disgusting and need to shave, shower, and stop wearing patchouli.

Hmm

It is a massive coincidence that patchouli is my most favourite smell.

I don't wear it though because everyone around me hates it, plus I'm in my 40's........

Grin

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sassandfaff · 16/07/2015 17:32

good for females.

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sassandfaff · 16/07/2015 17:35

The emphasis on 'feminists' is hers.

Apparently there is her type of feminist. (No quotations) who showers, shaves, doesn't stink and cares about the big stuff (she didn't specify) and then there are the other 'feminists' who stink, don't shave, wear patchouli, don't get cunnilingus and can't see the bigger picture.

Hmm

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OrangeIsMyNewBlack · 21/07/2015 21:55

It clearly is a feminist issue, because growing ones body hair should be a personal choice. And feminism, to me, means having the power to make decisions that others maybe wouldn't make whilst empowering others to make the decisions that maybe you wouldn't make yourself... do I make sense?

I keep myself styled pubically, but I don't tend to shave my armpits. It's just not something that I feel needs doing...

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nooka · 22/07/2015 06:58

I assumed that this thread would be about pubic hair because at least there would be a logical if still irritating connection. Unshaven armpits in women is the weirdest taboo. Why do people (including women) care so much? It's just a bit of hair that all adults grow after all.

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