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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Things you were told weren't ladylike

164 replies

thinkofablinkingnamewoman · 14/02/2014 17:09

A friend mentioned yesterday that her DH hates her smoking while walking - he says it makes her look like a tart. It reminded me of things my DM (mainly, DF occasionally) told me weren't ladylike when I was growing up. They were:
Smoking outside (clearly some things don't change)
Eating in the street (though for some reason chip shop chips were ok)
Sitting with my legs apart more than about an inch. This seemed to be quite a precise measurement
Talking about football to people I didn't know, even though my DF used to take me. Bizarrely cricket talk was ok.
Did you all have similar?

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Sparklingbrook · 14/02/2014 17:12

Eating in the street/walking along. And I still think it. Grin

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ForgettableTampon · 14/02/2014 17:13

yes to all of the Op incl cricket talk being A1

drinking beer

taking deep draughts of any drink, one ought to sip, even if one's throat is afire

mild curry, not ladylike to want a madras or vindaloo/phal

I look back and think sheesh, what a bloody stupid load of rules

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anklebitersmum · 14/02/2014 17:14

Nail varnish especially on toenails. Confused

ditto eating or smoking in the street

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silverten · 14/02/2014 17:15

I seem to remember my mother saying running wasn't ladylike, when we wanted her to join in games with us.

I suspect this had more to do with stress incontinence than anything else, but she would probably combust from shame if I ever asked her about it.

One of my less pleasant grannys used to rant on about how awful it was that I drank pints.

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BabyILoveYou · 14/02/2014 17:16

Drinking out of a can. I cannot do it now!

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ForgettableTampon · 14/02/2014 17:16

oh yes, something else:

don't flaunt your cleverness (the Harry Enfield Wimmin Know Your Place bobbins) be modest and self deprecating at all times

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Weegiemum · 14/02/2014 17:16

Eating while walking.

Otherwise, my mother seemed to object to everything (me being me).

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RedPencils · 14/02/2014 17:17

Can't remember whether eating in the street is considered unladylike or just common. We had plenty of rules about both, and I probably flouted them all.

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anklebitersmum · 14/02/2014 17:17

oh, and drinking out of a pint glass a rule I studiously ignore to this day

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Gunznroses · 14/02/2014 17:18

Whistling
Sleeping lying on your back.

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usuallyright · 14/02/2014 17:19

swearing.
When I was 18 a friends boyfriend told me off, said he hated to hear women swear.
I told the cunt to fuck the fuck off.

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NewBlueCoat · 14/02/2014 17:19

Drinking pints. My mother was relatively enlightened, given her upbringing, but even she used to buy me 2 halves rather than a pint Confused

I wouldn't know where to start with all the ga my gran used to come out with!

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ToriaPumpkin · 14/02/2014 17:19

Drinking pints. From a male colleague when I was 20-21. I suspect this was because I could out-drink him.

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TheBookThief · 14/02/2014 17:19

Ditto eating in the street

Chewing gum

Sitting with legs apart, should be crossed

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thinkofablinkingnamewoman · 14/02/2014 17:20

Had forgotten the pint glass and the nail varnish on toes! And anklets. I wondered why I felt faintly guilty when I had a pedicure the other day!

OP posts:
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sittingbythepoolwithenzo · 14/02/2014 17:20

Eating or drinking in the street (still agree with this one).

Getting drunk and falling over. I remember the chat from my mum very clearly - "I don't mind you going down the pub at 15, but don't come crying to me if they throw you out for being under age, and remember, it is not ladylike to fall over and appear drunk. If you want to create a good impression, don't get further than tipsy".

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cupidsabsolutepsyche · 14/02/2014 17:20

one of the nuns that taught me in primary school said whistling wasn't ladylike...i learned how to do it really quick after that.

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OneHolyCow · 14/02/2014 17:22

Oh yes the smoking outside! I'm Dutch and it applied there too.
Drinking pints, in the UK that is, because lady drink half's.. fuckit, I like pints.

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Wolfiefan · 14/02/2014 17:22

Me!
Grin

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MisguidedAngel · 14/02/2014 17:25

Definitely eating/smoking in the street and drinking out of cans/bottles. I can do the drinking thing now, but not the others. My headmistress used to tell all us girls "her voice was ever soft, gentle and low" - bleurghh!

The most bizarre of my mother's many bizarres rules for ladies was - no white shoes. I can't do that, either.

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Chottie · 14/02/2014 17:26

wearing patent shoes (the boys could see the reflection of your knickers in your shoes and it would inflame their passion) told to me at my convent school, so it must be true

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Wibblypiglikesbananas · 14/02/2014 17:28

MIL told DD that pulling faces wasn't ladylike. I don't hold with the term at all - we were playing at being monsters, she wasn't being rude (and she's only two). Bloody idiotic comment. Same as her comments on food being 'naughty' - erm, no, impossible for inanimate objects MIL...

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elportodelgato · 14/02/2014 17:31

One of my teachers told me it was unladylike to shout in the corridors at school when I was about 16. I remember being bewildered as it had never occurred to me that 'ladylike' was something desirable which I should aim for! I think I said as much too, I was pretty gobby and self-confident back then Smile

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zipzap · 14/02/2014 17:33

I went to a girls school where we weren't allowed to eat hamburgerswith our hands as it was unladylike - we had to use a knife and fork!

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DavidTwattenborough · 14/02/2014 17:38

Drinking pints or going into a pub by yourself - even if you were meeting somebody there...

Also swearing, whistling, and burping (I make a special effort to burp and whistle every chance I get these days - though I'm still not much of a swearer)

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