Right, well this is what I've sent them (made sure I did a spell check, seeing as it's the OED), will let you know if I hear anything back...
Dear Sir / Madam
I was wondering if you might consider changing the definitions for Housewife and Househusband so that they are a little more equal, reflecting their roles in modern society.
At present, there are disparities between the two, notably the Housewife being married but the Househusband just living with a partner, plus the implication that it is the wife's duty to stay at home rather than work.
It also seems to undervalue the contribution a husband / partner can contribute at the stay at home parent, while his wife/partner continues with her career.
I would consider it to be much equal to have a definition for both as 'a woman/man whose main occupation is caring for her/his family and managing household affairs' and just leave it as that.
I would be interested in hearing your views on this,
Fair enough - I wasn't sure about the traditional bit, but thought I'd leave it in to check reactions, partly as historically (rather than traditionally) it was mainly women who would be the one to stay at home.
I wonder why it said 'married women', yet with the man it said he was simply someone who lived with a partner. It makes it sound as if the woman's identity is all about the man, and the man's identity is all about the man!!!
Re SAHM - they need to be able to cite a certain level of appearance in a certain level of publications, I think, so Sahd was probably just not in wide enough usage at the time of the definition. Might be in the next revision.