Is the term 'Angry Fucking' potentially offensive to some women?

(237 Posts)
Ohsiena Wed 31-Oct-12 12:25:16

Ok I said I wouldn't start this, but I've been challenged to do so enough times, so I'm giving in.

It's about this thread - To think you should stay out of other people's bedrooms (378 Posts) 1This thread.

A very few of us understood why the term angry fucking was offensive to MrsC originally.

Most thought she had no sense of humour and just didn't get the joke.

Discussion was widened as a poster thught it was worse as used by a man. This has been attacked as sexist.

I stated on there that I'd like to see what some of the more feminist minded posters would make of this discussion.

I didn't want to start this, I've felt like a bit of a lone voice on there at times and need to do some RL stuff, but I've been called again and again to do so, so I have.

You'll see the phrase pearl clutching a lot....

Flatbread Fri 02-Nov-12 12:54:16

Chap, I know you asked Ed about boundaries, but I can give one example.

We have a friend who is gorgeous looking. Me, and my other girl friends compliment her, and have told her that she las lovely legs, nice breasts etc. One day, a male friend made a comment to her that he really liked her breasts. We all went silent and our gorgeous friend was offended and uncomfortable. The jerk's excuse was that we had told her that she had a lovely figure so often, so what was wrong with him making a similar comment?

You figure (pardon the pun). There is a difference between men and women making sexual or other sensitive comments that relate to the opposite sex.

OneMoreChap Fri 02-Nov-12 12:59:43

Flatbread thanks, that's one example.

You said "Tbh, I have never had a woman friend make a joke regarding angry fucking and double-teaming." Nor have I, but I've certainly seen jocular reference to angry/post-row shagging on here.

Is it only appropriate for women to talk about that?

Is it more appropriate for women to make sexual comments to men? That happens too...

Oddly enough re: complimenting another woman's breasts..., not all that many men I have heard make comments about each other's physique in any nice way - usually a bit of sledging.

Flatbread Fri 02-Nov-12 13:05:36

After-row-shagging is called make-up sex. And as Seinfeld said, it can be the best ever wink

Angry fuck, on the other hand, sounds like taking your anger out on someone through sex. It sounds like a form of punishment and comes across as controlling and aggressive.

i dont think angry fucking is violent at all i think it is just a more harder way of having sex if thats what u like ,and probably very passionate .

scottishmummy Fri 02-Nov-12 13:17:33

traipsing words out of context,across threads into feminism to get a hoped for response
I can only imagine you thought you'd get a favorable response in feminism
this is really puerile

Flatbread Fri 02-Nov-12 13:29:14

i dont think angry fucking is violent at all i think it is just a more harder way of having sex if thats what u like ,and probably very passionate

Oh really? Isn't rape a form of angry fucking? While all 'angry fucking' may not be violent (if it is consensual), most sexual violence involves 'angry fucking'

sm the OP was told to start another thread

TinyDancingHoofer Fri 02-Nov-12 13:54:44

The anger doesn't have to be directed at your partner. Sometimes i have a shit day, and like to have an angry fuck.

PickledFanjoCat Fri 02-Nov-12 14:04:58

A new thread yes, in the hopes of sparking a genuine discussion.

This was just copying the old thread over into feminism in the hopes of sparking a ruck in my opinion.

And the context that those words were posted on the other thread is also missing.

and the post (by a woman) preceding this comment

EdsRedeemingQualities Fri 02-Nov-12 14:11:44

I don't know Pickled. There may have been an element of that but from what I could see, I thought that the OP of this thread started it here as there were very few people on the other one who were willing to accept that those offended may have a point, or a valid reason for being offended, and perhaps she thought that the people usually around in the feminist section might see straight away what she/I/the other people were getting at.

Because some of us were having difficulty explaining it in a way that convinced anyone - even that convinced ourselves (well I gave up in the end, I couldn't put my finger on it iyswim)

I'm glad it ended up being less inflamed than the other thread was at the point when I left it. (yes, before you say it, I got cross on it)

Twibble Thu 08-Nov-12 17:33:11

I can't believe so much time is being wasted discussing this matter. In fact, it makes me Fucking Angry.

That is my contribution to this thread. I consider it to be quite witty.

No? Oh. Sorry. blush

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